The Other Side Of Me
by Mizzy681
Summary: One girl, two guys. Her best friend and the love of her life. Who will she choose? And will the other give up that easily? Cody/Miz/OC some Randy/Swagger/Evan
1. Long time no see

**A/N: I was rereading the entire story in hope to find some inspiration when I realized a huge part of chapter 1. So I rewrote it, for the fifth time that was. And well... I like a a lot more right now, I hope it's interesting enough to make you guys keep reading, because it will only get better I promise.**

**It's about love, friendship, the impossible choice between two men you love. It has a lot of drama... really, I mean them. The first few chapters is mostly Cody Rhodes, some Randy Orton and Ted Dibiase and of course my OC, Julia. After that Mike/Miz gets a really important role. What can I say... I'm obsessed and he's perfect. Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne and even Zack Ryder also play a role. I use their wrestling names for most of them, except for Miz (that would be silly) and for Dolph Ziggler, who has a minor role, but his name is just too silly to write. When I write Nick I mean Dolph. okay? **

**Disclaimer: I own no-one, not even my muses. I have to share them with Legacychick, but that's okay, because they make a mess of my house and drink all my booze. Apparently (I checked wikipedia on copyright) I do own my ideas and my OC, but well... I'd rather have Mike.**

**Also check out my banner on my profile. It's beautiful. My good friend Legacychick made it for me. I love her for it.**

**Well, enough rambling... please enjoy and remember, I live for reviews, I can take criticism, and I actually do things with it. **

**Chapter 1: Long time no see**

I was back at Raw. Back where I belonged I might add. Okay, writing for Smackdown was fine, but it was nothing like writing for live television. Not to mention that I was back with my best friends.

I was whooping and dancing around in my room, when a knock made me come down to earth, at least a little bit. I bounced to the door, too exhilarated to care who saw me acting this crazy. I opened the door to see my best friend and co-worker Sarah standing there and I pulled her in to an enthusiastic hug, "I'm back, Sar, I can't believe I'm really back. Wanna go for a drink? I can't wait to see everyone again!"

"Everyone huh?" The brunette raised her eyebrow at me, "I can remember you going on and on about a certain superstar."

I huffed, "I don't know what you're talking about. By the way, I'm here to work, not to play." I stared at her, trying to keep a straight face. I knew I should have shut up about him, but there are certain things you can't keep from your best friend, especially not when you're living together.

"Who do you think you're fooling girl? You're all about play. Remember Dolph?" As I said, best friends can be pretty annoying. A small smirk formed around my lips remembering how amusing that fling had been. Usually I didn't get involved with the wrestlers, they were nothing but trouble, but I had made an exception for Dolph. He had just been too much fun to resist.

"Anyway, we have no time for fun. We have a storyline to change. Ted has sprained his ankle and he's out for at least a week."

I pouted, "What a crappy job I have, first they pull me away from all my friends, and then they won't even allow me to go and say hi to them when I'm back."

"Look on the bright side, I'll let you go and tell Cody about the changes," Sarah smirked when she saw what must have been a very obvious blush forming on my cheeks. I ignored her comments and insinuations for now and took out my laptop to get to work. I wasn't so sure yet if it would be such a good idea that the first time I saw Cody again, would be just the two of us in his room. Sure, nothing had ever happened between us, but still…

It took us a few hours to finish the changes, because we decided to take the opportunity to start an entire new storyline. When we were finally satisfied, Sarah took matters in to her own hands and marched out to go and tell Jack Swagger and Evan Bourne about the changes, which left me no choice other than to call Cody. I vowed that I would find a way to get back at her for this later, before I nervously picked up my phone. I had butterflies in my stomach dialing his number. They increased when I heard his voice.

"Hey Julia, so it's true that you're back." I smiled, hearing the enthusiasm in his voice.

"Hey Cody. Err… we have some script changes, because Ted has hurt his ankle. Is it okay if I come down to your room tonight? But if you have plans we can talk about it in the morning." Mentally I kicked myself for sounding this insecure. This was work; I wasn't setting up a date with him.

"Sure! I always have time for you, beautiful. Can you come in half an hour? I just hit the gym and I have to take a shower first." The tone of his voice changed just a little bit and I knew he caught up on my nerves. Damn it, I needed to be in control when I saw him again. But when I put down the phone, I dropped myself on my bed, grinning like an idiot and thinking back to the first time I saw him.

Cody and I had met on my first day at Raw, now more than a year ago. I had expected to be allowed to work together with another writer to get to know the drill, but I soon found out WWE didn't work like that. Either you coped or you could leave. I was told Vince McMahon was impressed with one of the ideas I mentioned in my job interview. He wanted me to start this storyline as soon as possible.

I was freaked out the instant I heard this, because it meant I had to work with the three members of Legacy. I was terrified of ruining my shot and even more terrified of meeting these guys. I was a huge fan of Randy Orton, absolutely loving his character and the way he manipulated the public into hating him. Not to mention that I had had a huge crush on him since I had been a teenager... and the other two members of Legacy didn't exactly look bad either. But I was determined not to start anything with a wrestler. I didn't want to get that sort of reputation…

Cody and Ted were watching me as I approached them to be introduced. They were clearly talking about me, but I had no time to get nervous about that, because the moment I met Cody's eyes the world disappeared. For a second it was just him and me. A moment later everything came back into focus and I stumbled through the conversation, feeling his eyes on me the entire time.

Although we became friends, things never felt entirely comfortable between us. There was a lot of tension. It was like an invitation was extended all the time, only to be pulled back at the last moment. Whenever we went out with the crew, we had loads of fun, joking and flirting, but every night it felt like he switched himself off at a certain moment and went after another woman.

After a few nights out I accepted the fact that he saw things as a game between us, and that he wasn't really interested in anything other than messing with my head. Still no-one could make me lose my balance like he could just by looking or smiling at me. And the strange thing was that, even when he was chasing one girl or another, I noticed sometimes that he was still watching me.

The months passed quickly, and despite the chemistry between us, I had long since decided that Cody wasn't for me and that the wisest thing to do was follow his example and keep a distance. Not only that, but by this time, the draft had taken place, and I was getting ready to swap shows.

We went clubbing with a large part of the crew as a farewell party for me and everyone else who would leave for Smackdown or ECW. The night started out as usual, but this time Cody never left my side. At the time I expected him to go and find his girl for the night; he dragged me onto the dance floor instead. We danced for hours. Nothing existed but him and me. After what seemed like forever, we left to go back to the hotel, together. We stopped as we stood outside of the hotel, and I couldn't stop myself from feeling sad for the first time that night as I looked in to his eyes.

"I don't want this night to end, Cody. I don't want to leave."

"I know beautiful," he whispered this in my ear, "I can't help you with the leaving, but I won't let this night end until you're ready."

At that moment I wanted nothing more than for him to kiss me and carry me to his hotel room. We stared into each other eyes... I could see him thinking, trying to decide what to do. I was sure he knew what I wanted him to do.

After what felt like hours, he took my hand and took me to the park across from the hotel. Here we sat on a bench and talked until the sun came up. He held me tight, keeping me warm. I had been disappointed for a moment, but I realized this was the first time that we had really talked, just him and me. This night I saw a completely different Cody than the man I was used to. Gone was the cocky attitude, gone were the jokes and the boasting. He opened up to me and told me his dreams and fears. We talked about the things we wanted in life, what we loved and what we hated.

This Cody I felt comfortable with. This Cody I could fall in love with. There was no saying what would have happened between us if I had not left. When the sun came up and I had to get ready for my early flight, he brought me back to my hotel room. He hugged me, kissed me softly on my lips and told me he would miss me. That was the last I saw of him for the next six months, until now…

Cody opened the door with dripping wet hair and only wearing a towel. My heart raced in my chest.

He kissed me on the cheek and looked me up and down, his eyes lingering. "Still as beautiful as ever. I missed you, girl." The look in his eyes brought back the butterflies, but I wasn't going to lose my composure. But hell, a little flirting never hurt anyone, right?

I checked him out the same way he did me. "You don't look too bad yourself, Codes. Have you been working out?"

He laughed, still not breaking the eye contact, "My sister needed comforting because her boyfriend broke up with her; I just got off the phone. If you have a minute I'll quickly get dressed before we start."

"You don't have to do that for me Cody. You look fine dressed like that." I muttered under my breath when he walked away. He paused for a moment, letting me wonder if he had heard me.

I closed my eyes trying to memorize every part of his body. I had seen him a lot of times dressed in his wrestling briefs. I thought he looked sexy as hell then, but I could not have imagined how much better he looked like this.

"So Julia," he said a few minutes later, a smirk on his face as he looked at me with his amazing blue eyes. "I always thought I'd have to go to a lot more trouble to get you in my room."

I felt a pang in my stomach seeing the intense look in his eyes. Suddenly I wondered how this night would end. Somehow something between us had changed in our time apart. There had always been chemistry, but now the air almost crackled from the tension between us. I had no idea if I would be able to handle him if he acted like this, but for now I would just play along.

"I always thought I'd have to go to a lot more trouble to get you naked," I said this with a sweet smile, looking at him through my eyelashes.

His smile became wider, his blue eyes amused. "You sure know how to make things interesting, beautiful. I think things will be a lot more fun here now you're back. But let's get to work first." First? What did he mean by first? What else did he have in mind?

I took my laptop out and sat down on the couch. He sat down next to me, almost, but not quite close enough to touch. I felt the warmth of his skin and smelled his clean scent. I had trouble focusing, but pulled myself together and quickly told him the outline of the script.

Since Ted was out for at least a week, Cody would be on his own for now. This seemed like a great time to start an idea I had had for some time now, one that would see Jack Swagger and Evan Bourne teaming up and having a major feud with Legacy. Unfortunately this would start with Cody getting beat up by Jack Swagger after Jack rescued Evan from an assault by Cody. I said so to Cody, but he only laughed.

"I have been beaten up lots of time before, so I can handle this one. We fake it, remember? But I like your idea. I always thought Jack made a terrible heel. He just can't pull it off." He smirked.

I asked him to look at some dialogue. "I don't really like this part. So if you want to you can change it anyway you like, as long as the meaning stays the same."

He leaned over and turned the laptop his way, but left it on my lap. He started typing. I watched his fingers, transfixed with his presence. I wondered if he knew the effect he had on me. I laughed to myself. Of course he did. Cody was in control and he knew it.

"Finished!" He sounded content, and again he had a huge grin on his face, "See how you like it."

At that moment there was a knock at the door. Cody and I looked at each other and I was happy to see the annoyed look on his face. It was obvious that he saw this as an unwelcome intrusion. So did I for that matter. I had no idea where this was going to end, but I did know that I didn't want it to end anytime soon. I was kind of hoping that we'd end up having another one of our heartfelt talks, like the last time we'd spent together.

So far, the Cody I was with was like his old self. Charming, downright gorgeous... but he wasn't the Cody from the park. He wasn't the guy that had completely opened up to me about his life. I was hoping that it was all to do with the fact that we'd not seen each other in a while, and once he got used to me being back again, he'd drop the act.

Cody answered the door and I heard the voice of Randy Orton. I jumped up to greet him. I really liked Randy. He was the dream of every writer, because you could let go of every inhibition writing his story lines. Writing pure horror is so much fun. But, as for Randy himself, he was an amazing guy. He was funny, easy going and terribly good looking, so the dream of every woman, too.

"Hey, Randy, good to see you again. How are Samantha and Alanna?" And yes, this amazing guy is married and has a little girl; so unfortunately, I have to worship him from a distance. We were great friends and he treated me like his younger sister.

"Julia!" He hugged me, "I should have known I'd find you here just after you came back."

I laughed. "Just working, Randy. Some of us actually have to do more than look angry to get paid."

He looked at me closely. "We'll see. Just tell me if this punk bothers you. I will kick his ass."

He slapped Cody on the shoulder. "I came to ask if you wanted to have a drink, but I will leave you two to get on with whatever you are doing. I will talk to you later."

Once Randy was gone, Cody and I sat down again. I began reading the part Cody rewrote and he relaxed next to me. I noticed he was sitting a little closer now, his leg pressed against mine, his arm over the back of the couch, his eyes focused on my face taking in my reaction. I once again found it hard to concentrate on the script.

"That's not bad, Codes. It's not bad at all," I smiled at him. He looked terrible smug and he kept looking at me like he had something in mind.

I saved the file and stood up to put the laptop in my bag. When I turned around he was standing really close to me. My heart jolted. This was quickly getting out of control.

"I think I deserve a reward for that, don't you think?" A sly smile played around his lips and it didn't seem possible but he took another step closer. He was all but touching me. I could feel the warmth radiating from his body. My pulse quickened, reacting to the look in his eyes.

"Oh? Do you really think so? I'll have to think about that. What do you want?" My heart raced. I knew what I wanted... I wanted him. But I doubted this would be a smart thing to do. I knew Cody's reputation when it came to women. On the other side, six months of flirting hadn't brought me any closer to him and I was pretty sure I meant more to him than the average girl he picked up in a bar.

"I want a kiss." He had an intense look in his blue eyes. My heart skipped a beat. This was the first time he had shown real interest in me. I couldn't do anything else than play the game along. Ever so slowly I kissed him on the cheek, looking in his eyes when I pulled back.

He looked amused. "That wasn't really what I meant, beautiful. I think you know that."

"Hmm… is that so Cody? I think you need to show me what you mean." I teased. "Then I can decide if you really deserve that."

Cody had a sly smile on his face as he grabbed me by the hips. He pulled me close. I put my hands on his chest. I could feel his muscles through his shirt. "Are you sure you are up to this Julia? I warn you, I am not really a good guy."

He radiated danger now, but pressed against his body, I had lost all control over my mind. I felt a pang of lust deep inside me hearing his words. He must have seen this in my eyes because he wrapped his hands in my hair and kissed me hard. Like he said, it was not a nice kiss. It was, however, an extremely good kiss and I trembled on my legs when he pulled away.

He looked really pleased with himself. "You like that, don't you."

I couldn't find a good way to respond to that. This was definitely not the Cody from the park... but it didn't stop me from wanting even more of him. I knew I was going to regret this afterwards, but right now, I just couldn't help myself. Before I knew what I was doing, I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck and pulled him in for another kiss. There was no turning back after that.

His hands were traveling along my body. My hands pulled his shirt loose trying to feel his skin. He sighed when I succeeded. He felt amazing. I could feel every muscle beneath his skin trailing my hands along his back.

He pushed me back, breathing heavily. "Wait a minute." He walked to the door. I stayed behind, really confused. I should have taken this moment to try and act sensible, but my mind still didn't work. And then the moment was over, as he looked back, capturing me again with his eyes and his smile. He locked the door. "So I can't have anyone disturbing us. I have a lot of things in mind that I want to do with you, but none of it requires company."

I slowly walked towards him. "So, no threesome tonight?"

He laughed. "So you're the naughty girl, could've guessed that. I think you will discover that I am more than enough for you."

With that said, he lifted me from the ground, once again kissing me hard. I put my legs around his waist. He walked over and propped me up against the wall, so that his hands could have free reign. Every last bit of rational thought left me when I felt the effect his hands had on my body. There was no way I could stop this anymore.

"So," I said much, much later. I was in his arms; we were still naked, still sprawled out on the covers. "That was nice."

A look of confusion and surprise flashed over his face. "Nice? Julia, that's kind of an understatement. That was fucking amazing."

I looked at him with a blank expression. "Speak for yourself." I giggled when I saw the unsure look on his face. Still grinning, I hugged him. "To be honest it was kinda unbelievable."

He smirked. "You think you're funny, girl?" He relaxed next to me, resting his hand on my stomach, pulling me close.

I felt really happy right then enveloped in his arms, until I started wondering what would happen now. I didn't even know what I wanted myself. I always told myself that I didn't want to get serious with one of the wrestlers. I knew their life too well, and I also knew how hard it was on their girlfriends and wives. Being on the road with him would make things a little easier, but not by much. Both of us could get moved to another show at any moment, and what if we would break up?

I really needed to know where I stood with Cody and what he wanted from me. Did he want this to be a onetime thing or was this the start of something more serious? The stupid thing with men was that it was impossible to ask this. The minute they would hear any form of the question 'where is this going?' they'd be off.

These thoughts made me regret that I had made it so easy for him. I wanted more from him than just this one night and I wondered if playing hard to get would have been the better choice. Well, there was no way to back now, and even if it would have been just this night, it had still been amazing.

I snuggled closer to Cody. I would enjoy this as long as it lasted, but keep my distance at the same time. The last thing I needed was to really fall in love with this guy who was famous for his commitment problems. I'll be the first to admit that the chemistry between us was amazing and that there was a side to him that I could love. But I didn't know if I would ever see the Cody from the park again and I doubted that I could really handle the tension that Cody brought along on a daily basis. I wanted to keep things fun and uncomplicated.

For this reason I tried to sneak out some time later. I woke him up and he pulled me back. "Where are you going, beautiful?"

"I have to go. All my stuff is in my room and I don't want to be seen sneaking through the hotel in the morning." I said stern.

"Ah, please, stay with me? Who cares about other people anyway?" He pleaded, trying to look cute and innocent. Luckily for me he failed miserably.

"Give it up Cody," I laughed. "You can't pull off the puppy dog look and you know it."

He smirked. "Told you I am more of a bad guy, didn't I?" Suddenly he grabbed me and kissed me intensely. "So, if you really want to, you can go now."

He lay back on the bed watching me get dressed. I felt a little uncomfortable then, and more than a little turned on by his look. No! I said to myself. I will be sensible.

I walked to him, grabbed him by his hair and kissed him hard. "Bye Codes. See you later." I said sweetly before walking towards the door. I really wished I could have seen the look on his face, but if I had turned around it would have ruined the effect.


	2. The day after

**Chapter two: The Day After****  
**

I hadn't slept very well, as I had been savouring every moment that I could from last night. Not to mention I was more than a little bit worried about how I was going to react seeing Cody again. I decided to act cool, but wondered if I could pull that off. A knock on the door made me jump. My heart hammered in my throat. Surely it wouldn't be Cody?

And of course it wasn't. It was my friend Sarah who came to see if I was ready for breakfast.

"I hate men!" I said letting her in.

"I take it didn't go well with Cody last night?" She asked curious.

I sighed. "A little bit too well to be honest."

"Oh no, you didn't?" Sarah exclaimed. "You go girl!"

I stared at her with a dark look.

"Please tell me you aren't in love with him. That is about the worst thing that could happen." She put an arm around my shoulder.

"I don't know… I don't want to… I just want to play it cool. No! I just want to be cool about it! But you know how he is; he is just so damn cute. And we really get along…" I sighed.

"And I take it he is really good in bed too?" Sarah giggled. "We have all been there girl, falling for the wrong guy."

"He is not wrong, he is just Cody." I was a little bit irritated now. "And I don't think I've fallen for him, I just don't know how to go from here. And you know how much I hate not knowing what is going to happen."

"Easy Julia, no need to bite my head off." Sarah stood up.

"Come on. Get dressed and try to look as hot as possible." She searched my suitcase and threw some clothes on the bed. "Wear this. It will annoy him senseless and you look really good in it."

"My Randy Orton t-shirt? I didn't know you had it in you," I said admirably, "too bad there aren't any decent Miz t-shirts, That would be fun". I said grinning while getting dressed.

"A little bit of flirting with Mike or Jack would be even better," Sarah was really getting in to it no, "Jack was asking about you yesterday."

"Yeah right," I smirked, "Jack is more into supermodels and playgirls. The only reason he even tries is because I turned him down last year. And Mr. All American can't stand a girl who isn't in to him."

Sarah laughed. "Still it can't hurt to flirt a little... it isn't like you're planning anything serious. And you two do get along, when he forgets about his attitude. And you like Mike."

I did. Although a lot of other people found Mike an annoying smart-ass, I kind of liked that about him, I thought he was really cute, too. Too bad he lived in LA, the other side of the country. Talk about complicated. By the way, I didn't really want to get serious with any wrestler.

I smiled. "We have a tough job, don't we? Working with some of the hottest guys in the US. For some reason the normal guys just don't compare anymore." I looked at myself in the mirror admiring how I looked in my short jeans skirt, black knee high boots and Randy Orton t-shirt. "Yeah, this will do. Let's go have breakfast."

* * *

The breakfast room was already busy with the WWE crew and some amazed hotel guests staring at the Divas and superstars. I immediately noticed Cody sitting with Ted and Randy. He winked at me, smiling. I raised my hand, turning around when I felt two arms wrapping around my waist.

"Hey Julia, glad that you're back. I knew you wouldn't like Smackdown. It just doesn't have ME." That's Mike all right.

"Hey Mike, you're right. Smackdown was just too quiet after having to be around you. I couldn't get used to the peace. Although Chris Jericho really comes close to being as annoying as you are." I hugged him, smiling. It was good to be back. After that I was greeted by a lot of the crew and I almost forgot about Cody.

I ate my breakfast deliberately sitting with my back to him, happily chatting with Sarah, Mike and Evan. The latter, I noticed, looked like he was a little too interested in my female friend. I nudged her, asking her what was going on between them.

She looked at me blankly. "Nothing as far as I'm concerned. He is cute though. By the way, Cody has been staring at you the whole time."

I felt butterflies in my stomach. "Don't" I angrily told myself, or so I had thought.

"Hearing voices now, Julia? I have to let you in on a secret, don't talk back, it will only encourage them." I startled from the voice of Randy behind me. "Ah. Good to see that you're still a fan." He looked at my shirt approvingly.

"Why are you never wearing a Legacy shirt?" Cody appeared beside him. "You will look even hotter then. I know you dig us."

I smirked. "Dream on Cody. I am a Randy Orton groupie. Everyone knows that." I stood up to hug Ted DiBiase who just approached on crutches. "We have to go now. We have a lot of work to do. See you later."

I walked away with Julia, smiling broadly at Cody, who looked bewildered. I had the control now, that was sure. I wondered what I was going to do though, now that I did have it.

* * *

Just before the show that night I got a text message from Cody. "I really enjoyed last night. Thought you did, too? But if you want to forget about it just say so and I won't bother you again. Cody x."

Hmm, maybe I had been too hard on him. Still, I waited ten minutes before sending him a text back. "Last night was great! You are allowed to bother me again ;) Julia x."

Less than a minute later my phone beeped again "Good, I will :) See you tonight after the show. We're all going for a drink. Come too? Please?"

I laughed. He was on his best behaviour now. This might get interesting. I text him back telling him that I would come.

After that I focussed on the show, making sure that everyone knew their lines. I loved seeing the way the script worked out. It's amazing when the public reacts like as we planned. Right now, Cody was being booed for talking trash to Evan Bourne, which increased when he went after him with a chair.

I crossed my fingers that they would receive the rescue by Jack Swagger the way I hoped. And yes. The public booed Jack when he came to the stage, expecting him to help Cody. When he hit Cody with a running clothesline the public cheered. After the finishing gut wrench powerbomb the people actually chanted his name. It went exactly as planned.

I sighed. That meant that an entire storyline had to be written and it had to be ready this week. And I had to make sure that Jack didn't mess it up by letting his attitude get the better of him. That could definitely prove to be the biggest problem.

* * *

We went out with most of the crew later on that night. The next show was only a two hour drive which meant we could sleep late the next day. For the very least it meant no six o'clock flights. The atmosphere was great.

I chatted with Mike and some of the camera crew. All this time I had eye contact with Cody, who sat with Randy and Ted. They looked annoyed being cornered by some fans. Sarah was flirting with Evan, before leaving him to go to the dance floor with me.

This meant I got away from Mike (he never danced) who was coming on to me a little too strong. The last thing I needed were two guys to worry about. I was having a lot of fun with Sarah, while still maintaining eye contact with Cody.

Eventually, he stood up and began walking directly towards me, but halfway he was cornered by fans again, this time by two really hot looking women. It looked like he forgot all about me the moment they started dancing before him. This really annoyed me. "If you think I will be second choice to some stupid trashy groupies, you're wrong mister." I murmured.

I left the dance floor, when Evan approached Sarah and quickly got all her attention. I sat with Ted and Randy, soon being joined by Mike.

"Hey Ted. What the hell did you do with your ankle?" I asked.

"Fell down the stairs." He grinned, looking a little ashamed. "Strange thing isn't it. Never been injured before while a substantial part of my job consists of being thrown to the floor, but I can't even get down a stairway." We all laughed. "What is going on with you and Cody by the way? He's been acting really weird today."

"Dunno." I shrugged. "Nothing right now, since he seems to be hung up on those girls." I tried to hide my disappointment, but didn't seem to do such a great job.

I saw Randy glare at Cody. "He'd better not hurt you."

I smiled at him feeling grateful. "Good to know you still have my back".

He smiled at me, visibly relaxing. "You know, I'd do anything for my favourite fan."

I felt tense and kind of sad, but Mike came into use now with some new drinks, before filling us in on his wild tales. He kept more distance, having heard my conversation with Ted and Randy. I was glad about that. I really liked Mike, but could not handle him right now.

I didn't want to use him to make Cody jealous as well. At least, not without asking him. Cody and Mike never really got along, so he'd probably be happy to help me out. I was laughing at the jokes that Mike and Randy were telling, still occasionally turning to glare at Cody.

When we were ready to leave, I saw Cody try to kiss one of the girls but she rejected him, walking away with what seemed to be a boyfriend. The other girl had disappeared some time ago trying her luck with Jack. By the looks of that, he at least would get lucky tonight. I chuckled, happy how that turned out.

I got my coat when I was grabbed from behind by a really drunken Cody, who tried to kiss my neck. "Can't leave without me baby. I want you."

I tried to push him away. "Fuck off Cody, you're drunk."

He glared at me. "Playing hard to get now, are you? You weren't that difficult last night. I know you want me too."

I felt tears in my eyes now. I forgot that Cody was a mean drunk. "If you think I am going to be second choice to some eighteen year old girls who just rejected you, you are wrong. I am not going to be used like that. So I'll tell you one more time, FUCK OFF!"

He looked really angry and for one moment I was afraid he was going to hit me.

At that moment Randy appeared. "You heard her Cody. Leave Julia alone!" Randy looked really mad. If you've ever seen him on the show, you know that look. He looked really intimidating towering over Cody, but I was still afraid that Cody was going to spring either him or me.

Ted appeared too, trying to calm Cody down. "Let her go Cody, you know you are going to regret this tomorrow." Cody was still holding my wrist, but he let it go slowly. Ted always had a calming influence on him.

Randy put his arm around my shoulder leading me away. I was really crying now. "Come on girl, calm down, you know he didn't mean that. His inner jerk comes out when he's drunk." He hugged me tight. "I will kill him for you tomorrow if you want."

I looked in his eyes, wiping my tears away. "Why not right now? It might make me feel better."

"Because," a grin broke across his face. "He will not remember it properly when I do that tonight. Imagine being RKO'd while you're hung-over."

I laughed despite myself. "Oh Randy, why do you have to be married, you're like my prince charming."

He chuckled. "Funny choice in men you have, girl. Most people regard me like I'm a psychopath, I've never been the knight in shining armour before. Maybe I should let you turn me face. You seem to think I can pull it off."

I looked shocked. "Never, Randy. That would be a crime against humanity. The people need someone to hate. It would be like turning John Cena heel. Ugh that would turn out bad." We both laughed now.

I felt a slightly happier after my talk with Randy, but that didn't stop me from crying myself to sleep that night.


	3. All Apologies

**Chapter 3 - All apologies**

Cody

I woke up with a hammering headache having no idea where I was. I slowly sat up, grabbing my head, trying to open my eyes. I swore never to drink again. Once I finally realised where I was, I let out a sigh of relief. Good, at least this was my hotel room and I hadn't puked all over my bed this time. I was a little surprised to find out that I was lying on the floor next to the door. Usually one of the guys made sure I was on my bed. It made me wonder how much of an asshole I had been last night. At this moment I could not remember anything, so I put those thoughts away. Someone would probably tell me later anyway, so that could wait. My first priority would be to try and get to the shower.

I startled from the hard knocks on my door.

"Open up right now, Cody." I cringed hearing Randy's angry tone. I must have done something really bad. I wished I remembered.

I tried to stand up. "Quit the hammering man, my head hurts, I'm coming." I finally got to my feet and opened the door. Outside stood not only Randy but Ted, too. That didn't bode well for me. Teddy mostly stayed out of things like this.

Both were glaring at me. Noticing the ignorant look on my face, Randy looked even madder. "I see you don't know how you acted last night. How many times have I got to tell you not to drink that much? It will get you fired some day."

I put my hands on my ears. "Please don't scream like that, my head hurts".

This only seemed to get him going even more. "Your head will hurt a lot more when I'm done with you." It looked like he was going to punch me.

Ted interfered. "Calm down Randy, give him some time to recover. You can hit him later if you still want to."

I was surprised to hear this from Ted. He usually had my back. I sat down on the couch. "Tell me what I did then, it must have been bad."

Ted looked at me with an expression of utter disgust. "Go take a shower first. You stink! Try to remember what happened last night. It may save your life. I've never seen Randy this pissed off, and that says something."

I wanted to say something to break the tension, but thought better of it. Standing in the shower I slowly tried to recollect bits and pieces from last night.

I remembered talking to Ted and Randy, staring to Julia looking really good on the dance floor. Julia. some uneasy memory tried to enter my mind, but slipped away.

I recalled going to the dance floor wanting to dance with her. The two girls buying me constant drinks. I drank tequila, that explained the headache and the memory loss.

After that, only flashes. The girl, turning me on, but rejecting me to go away with her boyfriend, the other girl kissing Jack, me draining another big glass of tequila. The image of Julia looking scared, Randy glaring at me, but why?

Suddenly it hit me and I ran to the toilet puking my guts out. I remembered what I said to her, how I grasped her wrist when she tried to get away, probably hurting her, wanting to hit her, Randy interfering, wanting to hit him, too.

It hurt me to think about this and I felt more ashamed than I ever had. Thinking about how much I had spoiled things with Julia almost made me cry; I did like her a lot, but I knew I could forget having something along those lines with her now. It explained how angry Randy was at me. He loved her like a sister. I had to go and apologize. I left the bathroom slumping, feeling really bad about myself.

* * *

"I take it you remember?' Randy asked with steel in his voice.

"Yeah" I said, feeling numb.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't kick your ass right now. I promised Julia that I would." His blue eyes were cold while looking in to mine.

I just shrugged. No reason came into my head. If he wanted to hit me, there was nothing I could do to stop him. The only thing I cared about right now was how I was going to apologize to Julia.

Still, I was shocked when his fist connected with my face. Somehow I hadn't expected him to really do it. Although he had had some anger management problems in the past, Randy was not really a violent man. I fell down on the floor trying to protect myself. I saw Ted jump in front of Randy and say something to him. Whatever it was, it seemed to help.

"You will not drink again Cody, or I will have you put on probation. If I even see you holding a beer, I will kick your ass so hard that you'll regret being alive. Get drunk again and I will get you fired. Be glad no outsider saw this. If you would have hit that fan, you would be on the streets already." I had hoped that hitting me would've calmed Randy down, but he still seems as pissed as ever. "Get dressed; we're leaving in an hour."

I heard the door slamming and I was surprised when Ted helped me get up. "You really screwed it up, mate."

That was so true I nearly laughed. "You really think he would try to get me fired?"

Ted nodded. "I think so, yeah. What came in to you, Codes? You're never nice when you're drunk, but still."

"Dunno," I shrugged, looking ashamed, "I know I have a lot to make up for. Where are my clothes?"

* * *

Half an hour later I stood at Julia's door, asking myself whether I should knock. I saw Sarah coming out the next door, looking at me with disgust, before completely ignoring me. This didn't look like this was going to be a pleasant day. I knocked on the door and a few seconds later it opened.

Julia didn't look very happy to see me either. I just stared at her. She was so beautiful, looking angry and vulnerable at the same time. The look in her blue eyes went straight to my heart.

"Did Randy do that?" She pointed at my now black eye.

"Err, yes." I staggered over my words.

"Good." She seemed pleased. I knew I deserved this kind of treatment, but it still hurt to hear her say that. "What are you doing here?"

That question I could answer. "I came to apologize; I was an ass last night."

"You were, you don't have to tell me that. Why would I listen to anything you have to say?"

I was glad that she hadn't slammed the door in my face so I continued the speech I had prepared. "I feel really bad about how I acted; I don't know what came over me. I'm so sorry; please tell me how I can make this up to you. I really like you, but I know I messed that up." I sounded pathetic, I know that, but right now I didn't care.

She did not seem surprised hearing me say any of it. "Nice speech Cody. How long did it take you to come up with that? I know exactly what came over you. You warned me that you were a jerk, and guess what? You are. Stupid me for believing otherwise. Now go."

I halted, not knowing if I could risk saying anything else. "One question Cody?" I looked at her with hope in my eyes. "Did you feel sorry before or after Randy hit you?"

I looked in her eyes, pleading with her to forgive me. "Before. I puked my guts out when I remembered".

She looked at me with disgust. It pained me seeing that look in her eyes. "That would have been the alcohol, not the guilt."

Just then she was about to slam the door in my face, but I put my foot in the way. I'll advise no one to do that, it hurts like hell. "Will you ever forgive me? Not now, I know I can't ask that of you, but maybe someday later, we can be friends again?" As much as it hurt, I knew I couldn't expect anything more than friendship with her, after what I had done.

She looked at me with a slightly softer look in her eyes, which gave me a little hope. "I don't know." She sounded really sad now. "You were going to _hit_ me Cody, if Randy hadn't interfered. I don't know if I can be with a guy like that, even as friends. I really liked you Cody, but right now, it hurts me to even look at you." There were tears in her eyes now and I felt my heart break into little pieces.

All I wanted was to hold her close. But I couldn't do that now. "I swear I'll never drink again."

She sighed. "Does that really matter Cody? All alcohol does is lessen your inhibitions. That means that jerk from last night is somewhere inside you. It doesn't matter how much I like you most of the time, because I didn't like who you were last night. You were just plain mean. And it's not only about the way the night ended."

I looked at her surprised, suddenly understanding. "The other girls?" I asked. She nodded. "But why? The way you acted yesterday, I thought you were just in it for the fun... I didn't think you'd mind."

She smiled sadly. "That's where trying to play it cool got me, then. Still, I'm glad I found out the real you before I really fell for you. By the way, serious or not, no girl likes being shoved aside when a guy sees something better. And if that wasn't bad enough, you came back to me when you'd been rejected. I won't be your second choice, Cody."

I cringed, trying to decide which part to react to first. "That's not the real me, I swear. I know I can be a jerk…"

At that moment we were interrupted by Mike. Great, just the person I needed right now.

"You certainly are a jerk, Cody. You don't have to remind anyone. Is he bothering you, Julia? I can give him another black eye if you wish." He looked approvingly at the one I already had. "I take that Randy did that. He must have done it this morning then. If he would have gotten to you last night, I don't think you would have come off that easily. You're lucky that Ted likes you. Though I don't think even he really does right now."

Mike did witness everything too then. I wondered if everybody I knew did.

"Just leave him Mike, he's not worth it... and besides, he was just leaving. Bye Cody." And that's how it ended. With me on the outside, and Mike in her room.

* * *

Julia

I cried after he left, being comforted by Mike. I don't think Mike really understood why I cried. Cody had looked so vulnerable and sad. I saw a side of him I had never seen before. And the things he said. He really meant them; I could see it in his eyes. I tried to shake these thoughts. Enough of that. I had to get over him and fast.

"You really like him, don't you?" Mike was more perceptive than I had thought. I nodded. I lied to Cody, lied to myself, too. I had already fallen hard for him.

"You know you have to get over him. He's not a good guy. You know I never liked him, but this is more than two guys not getting along. I saw it in his eyes last night. He was going to hit you. Please tell me you have no thoughts about forgiving him. You can't be with a guy like that. You deserve better than him." Mike looked at me with a decisive look in his eyes. "I will not let him get close to you again. I'll sleep in front of your door if needed".

"Thanks Mike." I smiled despite myself. "You're a good friend, but I think I will be safe enough without you as my personal watchdog." I giggled, seeing that picture in my mind.

I hugged Mike, feeling safe in his arms. Safety was a feeling I didn't get with Cody. He was all about tension, excitement and uncertainty. I sighed. It really was true that women always fell for the wrong men. I decided to be stronger than that. I had had my heart broken before. It would heal in time.

"Come on Mike. We have to go to the bus."

I stood up to get my suitcases, but he beat me to that. "At your service, ma'am."

I shrugged. If he wanted to carry my luggage to the bus, he was welcome. I had noticed going for breakfast that the elevator was broken.

When I went to sit in the bus, I immediately noticed Cody sitting on the back seat, looking really depressed. He was sitting alone, even Ted had deserted him. I felt really bad about that, but was not ready to forgive him. I didn't know if I ever could. I couldn't trust myself with him.

* * *

Cody

When I went to the bus, Ted was waiting for me. He looked uneasy. "You know I'll always be your best mate, Code, but right now, I'm too still angry at you to be near you."

I only nodded, understanding him perfectly. "Believe me, Teddy; if I had the chance to stay away from me, I would too. Still, I really need my best friend at my side. Talking to Julia nearly killed me." I really needed Ted right now to talk to. He was the only one who really knew me.

I saw the pity in Ted's eyes. "Later Codes, not now."

I sat at the back of the bus, quickly putting on my sunglasses and looking out the window. I was trying to ignore the others staring at me, and really trying to hold back my tears. When I saw a flash of red hair, I forgot about that intent.

I could only look at her. Even in her comfortable travelling clothes, she looked amazing. There was something about her that really got to me. It was a lot more than her being beautiful, which she was. Seeing her this upset, and knowing I was the one who caused it, made me hate myself. For the first time I realized I had feelings for her. A lot of feelings. I hated Mike for being the guy that got to comfort her.

Randy walked towards her, probably asking her if I had bothered her today. Randy shot a look full of hate in my direction. I wondered if I would ever get on his good side again. Right now I didn't really care. When the bus finally began to move, I switched on my iPod, thinking about the things she had said to me earlier.

I knew I was a mean drunk, which was why I always tried not to drink too much. Once in a while that went wrong. Mostly, I ended up really insulting someone or having to be dragged out of a fight. But hitting a girl? I never thought I'd had that in me. I hung my head. What if she was right? That what I do when I'm drunk is something I could do when sober? I just didn't want to believe that. If I had just stopped myself from being distracted by those stupid girls. They were nothing anyway. Feeling the anger building up inside me, I clenched my fists. This scared me; I didn't want to be that guy. I screwed up big time and now I had to pay for that.

"Are you ok, Cody?" I felt a hand on my shoulder. I decided against ignoring him, glad I seemed to have at least one friend left.

"What do you think, Jack, do I look ok?"

"Not really, no. What the hell did you do to piss everybody off like this?"

I was flabbergasted. "You mean you don't know?"

He shrugged. "I was busy last night and missed breakfast this morning. And I don't like to talk about anyone behind their back, so I came to you. You look like you could use a friend."

I felt thankful about that. "I really do. I even succeeded in pissing Ted off. Never thought I could do that. I was drunk last night."

Noticing the question marks in Jack's eyes, I went on. "I almost hit Julia, because she turned me down. This was because one, I was drunk and two, because I only came for her after I got turned down by two other women, one of which ended up in your bed, I guess. When Randy interfered I almost hit him as well."

Jack whistled slowly. "I can understand why they are angry. Have you tried apologizing? I always find that helps. Still, I've never tried to hit a woman."

I sighed. Leave it to Jack to come out with the useless advice. I removed my sunglasses.

"Randy hit me when I tried. Ted told me he can't stand to be anywhere near me and Julia told me she thought I'm not only a jerk when I'm drunk, but that in her eyes, I am the same person when I'm sober." After that we were silent. Jack could be a pain in the ass, but he knew when to shut up.


	4. RKO

**Chapter 4 – RKO.**

One week later.

Cody had been avoiding me all week. I still didn't know if I was glad about that or not. It was certainly good for me to have some distance, but the glances I saw of him did not make me happy. He looked depressed and was alone most of the time. The only one who hung with him was Jack. But he was busy.

Sarah worked with Cody, Ted, Jack and Evan on the new storyline we were writing. Although it was my idea, it was decided that I had to work with some other superstars. I didn't really mind. I got the new DX-storyline and since those two are amazing performers, writing with them was a lot of fun. DX being who they are, they had a lot to say about their storyline. It really took my mind off of Cody.

Still I resented not being able to work on my idea, and I hated not knowing how Cody was. Sarah told me Randy had tried to press her into writing a storyline in which he could kick Cody in the head, but I asked her to not listen to anything he had to say about Cody right now. I sighed, deciding I would go talk to both Randy and Ted later tonight after the show. It was about time they started to cut him some slack, at least.

* * *

I was watching the show later that night. I felt my heart going out for Cody when I saw his entrance. He tried to be as cocky as ever but I knew his heart wasn't really in it. He seemed to pull himself together once the match started, though. Good thing that Jack was one of the few people who didn't hate his guts right now, or this match would have been ugly.

Legacy was getting the upper hand in the match for the moment, but having seen the script, I knew Evan and Jack where scheduled to get the win. I went to get a drink and when I went back I was surprised to hear the crowd booing so loudly that I could feel the hate flow through the building. That could only be Randy, but it wasn't in the script.

I quickly went to the television screen where I saw Randy walking purposefully down the ramp towards the ring. Cody was in the ring right now, holding Evan in a head lock. Randy walked towards Ted. He said something, and then went into the ring, just looking at Cody. The referee tried to get him out, but Randy shouted something at him, making the man think better about interfering. Cody stood up, slowly releasing Evan. Evan took the opportunity to tag Jack in the match, but Jack just stepped in the ring, stayed in the corner, and kept his distance. I could see in his eyes, that he didn't like what was happening one bit.

A second later Randy was on Cody. He didn't even hit him, just slammed him face first to the floor with an RKO. The referee tried to stop the match, ringing the bell, disqualifying Evan and Jack, but I could see Randy was not done with Cody yet. I could hardly watch this, but at the same time couldn't take my eyes of the screen.

When Randy made ready to kick Cody, Jack interfered. He stood in front of Randy, trying to get through to him. In the meantime Ted helped Cody out the ring. I felt really angry at myself that I hadn't talked to Randy yet. I should have known something like this would happen. Trust Randy, to take his frustrations out in public.

* * *

I didn't want to make this any more public than it already was, so I went up to his hotel room later that evening. Walking the corridor, I ran into Cody. He looked so sad that my heart bled for him.

"Did you come here to congratulate Randy for teaching me a lesson? I didn't see this in the script, was this a secret I was not in on?" He tried being tough, but I could see right through this.

"If it was, I wasn't in on it either. And they will hear about that from me, you can be sure about that. I came here to kill Randy because of this. I thought I made it clear I didn't want him to do anything like this." I laid my hand on his arm. "I'm sorry Cody. You don't deserve to be treated this way."

"I don't?" He hung his head. "I thought you hated my guts too. I thought it served me right."

I shook my head. "No, Codes, I could never hate you. It was just, last week, you scared me. But I don't like seeing you this depressed."

He looked at me, finally letting go of his attitude. I could see into the core of his being. There was so much pain inside. "Oh Cody." I reached out to hug him. He clung to me; I thought he might be crying.

He pulled himself together. "You forgive me then?"

"Yeah, I guess I do." I smiled. "Let's try being friends again ok?"

"Just friends?" The pleading look in his eyes almost made me give in. I could see he was thinking about kissing me. I was very aware of his arms around me and the hammering of his heart.

"Just friends," Then I added, "At least for now."

At that moment we were interrupted by Ted. I sprang to him immediately. "Did you know about what Randy was planning?"

He looked startled by my anger. "Whoa, calm down girl, I had nothing to do with this. I would've stopped him before Randy kicked him, if Jack hadn't done that already. I helped Cody out of the ring remember?"

He turned to look at Cody afterwards, "Look mate, I came to say I'm sorry, I acted like a jerk last week, I kinda got carried away with Randy, and I should have talked to him earlier. I would have if I knew he was planning this. You're my best friend; I should have had your back. I want you to know that from now on, I always will have." He smiled. "It's funny that you are the first to forgive him, Julia."

I smiled too, until I remembered where I was heading. "You two kiss and make up, I have something to take care of."

* * *

I stormed into the room of a very surprised Randy a few minutes later. I glared at him. Randy looked perfectly innocent. "What Did You Not Understand About Leaving Him Alone?" I asked, emphasizing every word.

"I thought you didn't mean that. I know you always try to be nice, but he did deserve it." Randy sounded way too happy about himself.

"He DESERVED you punching him in the eye last week. He DESERVED getting the silent treatment last week. He DESERVED me being mad as hell with him. He however DID NOT deserve to be kicked in the head before an audience of millions. Oh, and to top it all off, you nearly destroyed a perfectly good storyline. How do you think we will explain you attacking Cody like that? How can we make the feud between Legacy and Jack/Evan believable again when Jack had to protect Cody? And it's good he did, because I could see on your face that you intended to really hit him. How would you have explained that injury to Vince? How will you explain what happened tonight? He will probably fire Cody if he heard what happened last week."

Randy had the decency to look guilty now. "I guess I got carried away a little, I just kinda liked being your hero."

I sighed. "I appreciate you standing up for me, but I told you a million times I didn't want you to do it." I hugged him. "Now, go and clear the air with Cody. If I can forgive him, you certainly can too."

Randy looked at me, a worried expression on his face. "You forgave him? You don't think it is better to stay away from him from now on?"

I felt angry now. "Come on Randy, the guy is one of your closest friends. I don't know if you saw how he looked last week, but I noticed. He feels guilty as hell. He made a mistake, but nothing really happened. I think he has been punished enough now, thanks to you." I felt like crying. "I missed him like hell this week, Randy. I think that I'm in love with him."

I slumped down on the sofa, tears streaking down my face. Randy immediately sat down next to me, wrapping a comforting arm around my shoulder.

"But how, why? You haven't seen him for months, you spend one evening together and then he treats you like a ass. And now you're in love with him. I always thought you were smarter than that, Julia."

I tried to get control of myself. "I don't know, maybe I already felt that way before I even moved to Smackdown. And seeing him this sad only made things worse. I can't stay mad with him and I can't get him out my head. You know him Randy, tell me if he is really is the bad guy that he seemed last week. If you think he's bad news I will stay away from him."

Randy stiffened. "The guy can be a jerk, but I've never seen him acting like that. I don't know what got in to him last week. I can't be sure though. Maybe you should talk to Ted. They're really close." I looked at him pleading. "I'll talk to Cody. I guess I have some apologizing to do."

* * *

Cody

I was in my room getting ready for bed. A storm of emotions were running through my head. I was happy that Ted seemed to have forgiven me. I felt more than happy after talking to Julia like that. I remembered how good it felt to hold her again. At the same time I felt ashamed that I had thought about kissing her.

I should've learned from my mistakes. No matter how much I liked her... ha, who was I kidding? I was in love with her... and I couldn't do that to her. I couldn't trust myself around her. I had to be the stronger man here and keep my distance.

I also felt angry at Randy for humiliating me like that. Ok, I deserved being punished, but he crossed a line there. Still, I felt sad that I would probably never get my friendship back with Randy. The guy was not only a friend, he was my mentor and I really admired him. He would get me kicked out of Legacy and maybe even the WWE. I punched wildly at a pillow, when I heard the knock at my door. Hoping for one minute that it was Julia, I decided that I would send her kindly back to her room if that was the case.

If I could have kicked myself in the head, I would have when I saw it was Randy. Of course Julia wouldn't come. "Come in." I said darkly, surprised by the uneasy look in his eyes.

"Look, I want to apologize, I shouldn't have done what I did tonight, I went too far." I was lost for words now. This was the last thing I had expected from Randy. "Let me make myself clear, I am not sorry about punching you last week. You deserved that. But tonight was wrong."

I felt a weight lift from my shoulders. "It's ok Randy, I was an ass. I'm sorry too, nothing like that will happen again."

"No, it certainly won't. I was serious about you not drinking anymore. For some reason that girl really likes you and I have to be sure you can keep your temper in check. If I ever find out that you hurt her or any other woman, you will not get away with it this easily. How could you do it Cody? I never would have thought you to be that kind of man." The anger left his voice, making him sound tired.

"I honestly don't know," I shrugged. "I have been thinking about that all week. I don't want to be like that. I guess I didn't know what was happening, I couldn't control myself, but still... I didn't really do it, I might not have done it even if you hadn't interfered. I hope that at least. Please tell me we are ok."

He looked at me for about a minute, and then replied with only a nod, before slapping me on the shoulder and walking away.


	5. Life goes on

**A/N And here's the next chapter. I know I took a while. I just got another idea for the end, which means rewriting everything that I already had finished. This chapter is an intermezzo before the real drama kicks in again. Read, review and tell me what you want to happen next, I might chance my mind all over again.**

**Loads of thanks to my beta-reader, Chain Gang Princess, and to lknight91, kristi, Legacychick and Volcomstonebabe for their reviews on the last few chapters. Just for lknight91 there will be more Randy later on, but for the next few chapters she has some other men to cope with. **

Chapter 5 - Life Goes On.

Six months later.

Life was almost back to normal. When it was obvious that not only Ted and Randy, but also I could forgive Cody, most of the people went back to their usual business. This of course didn't mean that everybody liked him. Some people never would.

I smiled, thinking back to that first breakfast after all the commotion; when I deliberately sat down to eat with him, ignoring the stares from the others. I was quickly followed by Jack and Ted and we all chatted happily. I did see the unhappy look in Mike's eyes, but just smiled and waved at him.

When Randy entered the breakfast room, suddenly everybody fell silent. He walked over to our table, slapped Cody on the shoulder and then went to sit with Shawn Michaels and John Cena to discuss how to mend the mess he had made last night. He would be expecting a call from Vince McMahon any minute now.

When he finally did get the call, we all waited nervously beside, hoping that nothing serious was going to happen. Randy apologized to begin with, he told Vince that it had all been a personal issue, and that he promised never to do it again. Somehow he managed to get away with it without even a suspension. Vince warned him, of course, and told him the complications the writers now had to try and get the storyline back on track, but other than that, he didn't even get punished. I guess it had something to do with him being one of the top guys in the business. Vince couldn't afford to even have Randy off of work for a few weeks.

As for the storyline, it was actually Randy's idea to basically tell the fans the truth... In a backstage segment, he announced that the reason he had done what he did was because of a personal issue between him and Cody, and that it was nobody else's business. This way, we could always start another feud off between them in the future with this point, if that was ever going to be the case.

With that said, he did end up challenging Cody for a match that night. The match was a beauty, and Cody almost got the victory. We couldn't exactly let the Legend Killer lose to one of his protégé, but we wanted to make it close to keep the crowd on their feet. After the match, Randy pulled Cody up from the mat, and they went out the ring together, being joined by Ted on the ramp.

So, after that, you may have thought that everyone was happy one again... but that definitely wasn't the truth.

* * *

Since then, I did hang out with Cody, but he seemed distant. I constantly tried to talk to him, about anything and everything, but every time I did, he just avoided the questions. When I asked him what was bothering with him, he barely spoke at all. Not to mention when he did, he was the same old cocky Cody that I had first known, not the one I had been hoping to have back now that he'd made such a big mistake. He acted as if nothing had ever happened between us. In fact, it was if I was a vague acquaintance of his now.

After a while, I gave up on asking Cody about his problems, and went to someone else. I tried to get the information out of Ted, but he knew about as much as I did. "If Codes doesn't want to talk, he won't." He shrugged, like a typical guy. "There is no way of getting it out of him, unless you're thinking of torturing him. I'll keep an eye out for him though."

It was around this time that I started to get really close with Mike. He had always wanted to protect me from danger, or even just be the shoulder I cried on, so right now he had the perfect shot to be there and listen to my problems. Not that he really cared about the fact that Cody was being an ass... actually, he was pretty happy that he was keeping his distance from me... but he was there for me, all the same.

It was around this time that I started to see Mike differently. I had always liked his easygoing nature, his sense of humor and the way he was up for any stupid thing we planned, no matter how crazy it was... but it wasn't until now that I realised how perfect he was. How cute he was when he told his stupid jokes, or how nice it was to be comforted by him.

But there was still something missing. He was perfect boyfriend material, but no matter how I had started to feel, it still wasn't the same as how I felt for Cody. There was no heat, no passion.

Still, I often caught myself wondering what it would be like to be with Mike.

The only problem with me spending so much time with Mike, was that he and Cody seemed to hate each other even more, now that Mike was the one spending the time with me. When they were in the ring together during their current storyline, Jack had to keep an eye on them both constantly, and he'd even had to break up a bunch of real fights between them too... both in the ring and backstage.

Talking about Jack, it was strange, but he suddenly seemed to remember that about a year ago now, I had turned him down. It didn't take him long after that to try and even the score. I didn't really want to admit it with him... but when we started to play games with each other, I actually had a lot of fun. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that none of us were serious? Neither of us really liked each other in that way, so all the flirting around we were doing was safe... and easy.

Because of the easiness of it all, Jack and I grew close too. We were often hanging out in each other's hotel rooms now, watching movies, playing games and raiding the mini bar. Most of the time we were joined there by Mike, Sarah and Evan. The latter two had hooked up months ago and they were often the first ones to break from the party. That left me with Mike and Jack, who were my best friends here now. Frequently we fell asleep, all three of us in the same bed, too lazy to go back to our own rooms. The first time that happened it was a little embarrassing, but soon we grew comfortable together and I often snuggled against Jack or Mike. It wasn't like anything ever happened, though.

Although Jack and I knew we were only messing around, not many others did. We didn't know it was possible for anyone to believe we were actually being serious, until one particular night after a show. After a night of laughing, flirting and dancing with Jack, on my way back to my room in the hotel, I ran into Cody in the hotel. His gorgeous blue eyes were staring into mine with such intensity that I could feel my heart hammering in my chest.

He talked with a strained voice. "I just want to say that I'm ok with you being with Jack. He's a good guy, a lot better than I am. I'm glad it's not Mike though." He didn't even give me time to respond before he quickly walked away.

I cried myself to sleep that night... again. Maybe we had somehow managed to fool everyone else, but I couldn't fool myself.

I was still in love with Cody, and I loved him more and more with each passing day. I just didn't know what to do anymore. If I was sure that he liked me, I would have just told him that I wasn't really with Jack. But after the way he had acted over the last few months, how could I? It was like he didn't even care. I didn't understand one bit of it.

The next day, I had tried to talk about Cody to both Sarah and Mike, but it was pointless. "He's bad news Julia, just forget about him." This was the typical comment I got from Sarah when it came to Cody.

Mike usually told me this, too. "You're too good for him; you could do a lot better than Cody Rhodes, Julia. All of us seem to know that, except for you. Maybe you do need to move on. There are plenty of guys out there that want to be with you."

Obviously, he was talking about himself. I don't know where it had come from, but I had actually been tempted by his offer. There was nothing like a good rebound lover to mend a broken heart. But I couldn't do that to Mike; he was too good a friend and I knew he was in love with me. I liked Mike a lot, and I wanted to be over Cody completely before I tried anything with him.

And then there was Jack. That was a much better option. I must say, I was curious about how much of his boasting was true. But there were still two good reasons not to go down that road.

First, was that he actually said in an interview he'd done for the official WWE website that he had never been rejected by a woman before. Obviously this was a lie, seeing as I had rejected him not too long ago. If I were to give in now, it would not count as a real rejection anymore… at least not in his eyes. He would rename it 'playing hard to get' and I didn't want to let him win this one.

The second reason came back to that man once again. I just couldn't bear the thought of moving on with someone that wasn't Cody, because I knew when I did, then everything between us would definitely be over. Jack was one of Cody's best friends... so if I were to start something with the All American American, then every chance of me and Cody ever getting together was gone.

**Reviews please!**


	6. Moving on?

**And here is chapter 6. Read and review. Thanks for the reviews and the story alerts. Especially for**** lknights91** **there is some Randy in this after all. But mostly there is a lot of Mike (yummy). **

**Chapter 6: Moving on?**

"Hey guys," I said, as I walked into the locker room that Mike and Jack shared. "What are we going to do tonight?"

"Julia! Are you crazy? Don't you even knock anymore?" Mike shouted as he hurried to cover himself with a towel. Jack, who was already half dressed, just grinned.

"Relax Mike, I've seen most of you already. You don't exactly wear a lot of clothes when you're wrestling." I leaned against the wall and checked him out. The glance I had seen of his bare ass was almost breathtaking. I loved wrestlers, they had such amazing bodies.

Mike, now with a towel around his waist, walked up to me and smiled.

"The problem with that, Jules, is that I haven't seen quite so much of you. Since Jack and I walk around half naked most of the time, it would only be fair if you would parade around in your underwear once in a while."

"I second that!" Jack exclaimed. "Maybe that's what we can do tonight."

"Dream on guys…" I smiled. "But don't worry, Mike," I took a step closer and ran my hands across his chest, letting them pause on his hips. "I haven't seen quite as much of you as I'd like." I tried to rip the towel from his waist, but he was quicker and grabbed both my hands, pulling me close.

"Be careful Julia; don't start anything you don't want to finish." His eyes sparkled from the fun and something else I couldn't quite grasp. He leaned towards me and kissed my cheek.

"But when you decide that you want to finish it, tell me and I might just let you rip the clothes off my body." He roared with laughter, grabbed some clothes and walked to the bathroom to get dressed.

Still laughing and joking when they were finally ready, we left the locker room to go back to the hotel. There we ran into Randy and Ted. I flew towards Randy and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Oh Randy, I haven't seen you for ages. How are you? Did you have a nice vacation? How are Alanna and Samantha?"

He chuckled. "Well, look who's hyper today. I had a great vacation and everyone, including me, is doing great. Next time that we are anywhere near St. Louis, you'll have to come and visit us. I'd love you to see my little girl again."

"Oh I'd love to; I haven't seen her since she was a little baby," I smiled up, before I turned to include the others in the conversation, "What are you guys up to tonight?"

Ted answered. "We're meeting Cody for a drink in the hotel bar. Do you want to come?" His eyes flickered to Mike and back to me.

I hesitated. I looked at Mike whose smile had faded and then to Jack, who just shrugged.

"No, not tonight. I'm way too hyper. Pour any alcohol in me and I'll never slow down again. I'm so excited about going to Australia tomorrow. I always wanted to go there. I need to calm down a little, or I'll be too exhausted to enjoy anything. We'll go for a drink soon, OK Randy, Ted?"

They nodded. They both looked slightly scared from my outburst, but I shrugged it off. Better they wanted to get away than make me join them. I gave Randy one final hug and whispered, "Say hi to Cody from me." Randy nodded again, but his eyes clouded over and I didn't know if he would do it or even if I really wanted him to.

When we had reached the hotel, both Mike and Jack looked overwhelmed by my elated behavior. Right now I was skipping alongside them through the hotel corridors. In my hotel room I immediately turned on the TV for some music and started dancing and singing along at the top of my voice. Mike and Jack looked at each other, shrugged, and joined in. Mike surprised me by being quite a good dancer. He never danced so I had expected him to suck. Jack on the other hand... let's just say his attempts to move to the beat were hilarious.

I think we had danced for close to half an hour when Mike and Jack finally gave in and slumped down on the bed. They made themselves comfortable and talked softly. I pouted because my friends were so boring and I started dancing seductively to get their attention. Two pair of eyes snapped back to me and followed my every move.

"So," Jack joked. "Have you decided to strip for us after all?"

"In your dreams, Jack." I grinned and dived on the bed between them. The bed squeaked alarmingly. "You guys are way too heavy. You're breaking my bed."

"The bed was fine before you jumped us." Jack raised his eyebrow at me.

"What did they feed you today, Jules? I've never seen you acting this crazy." Mike grinned and pulled me close. "Stop bouncing, you're making me seasick."

"Now you understand what it's like for people when they're around you." I stuck out my tongue. I put my head on Mike's chest and snuggled close to him. "Hmm… you're so much softer than Jack. You make the best pillow."

"Ha… there you have it Mike. I told you that you were getting fat."

"Don't listen to him Mike. You're perfect." I yawned, suddenly exhausted. All of that dancing must have taken its toll after all. I snuggled in even closer and closed my eyes. "It's too bad you snore."

"I don't snore. Jack does." Mike sounded offended.

"You do snore, Jack snores like a pig and Mike, you talk in your sleep all the time. It's never quiet when you two are here. It's a miracle I sleep at all."

Jack laughed. "What do you expect from him? He never shuts up... but you talk in you sleep too, Julia."

"What!?" I bolted up suddenly. "I don't!" I cringed in horror, "What do I say?"

"Oh just the usual stuff… 'Jack you are so handsome' or 'I want you Jack', things like that."

I shook my head furiously. "No..." I rolled my eyes, "I can't imagine saying anything like that. When I've dreamt about you, it's only ever been nightmares. Are you sure it wasn't Mike who said that?" I giggled, ducking the pillow that Mike flung at my head.

We continued like this for quite a while, until I kicked them out under loud protest. I wanted to take a bath and a get good night's sleep. For one short moment I realized that I might have let Mike stay if it would have been just us, but I shook this thought away quickly, blaming it on my exhaustion. Still, he did have an amazing ass. I wouldn't mind seeing that again.

* * *

I woke up from a knock at my door. I looked around confused, surprised that I was alone, before I remembered that I had kicked out my friends. I stumbled out of bed and opened the door to see Mike standing there. He checked me out, grinning. I was only wearing a men's t-shirt and it barely covered my hips.

He didn't say anything, just entered my room, pushed me up against the wall and crashed his lips against mine. And I… I answered his kiss, opening my mouth for his tongue, moaning against him. I wanted this as much as he did. Mike took my shirt off and I practically tore his from his chest. He didn't waste time now that he had me where he wanted me.

His hands were roaming every part of my body as mine were with his. I cried out when his hand slipped between my legs, feeling how ready I already was for him. The next moment we were both naked and he lifted me so I could put my legs around his waist. He propped me up against the wall, then lifted me a little more so he could enter me.

He started pumping in and out in a steady rhythm, every stoke getting me closer to an orgasm. When he finally pushed me over the edge, his face started to change, for a moment he became Cody, then a flash of Jack, Randy for less than a second and Mike and Cody all over again...

I woke up from the shock; my entire body ached from the need awoken by my dream. It had felt so real and so right somehow. I turned over, half expecting Mike to be lying next to me and I felt a stab of disappointment to find out that he wasn't.

I had never felt so confused in my life. What did this dream mean? The way Mike acted in my dream was nothing like my friend... he had acted like Cody. And what was with Jack and Randy? Jack wasn't so difficult to explain, but Randy? I focused on Mike and Cody again, the other guys didn't really seem important. Did this mean I wanted Mike to be more like Cody, or did I want Cody to be more like Mike? Both options were a possibility. I had seen the softer side of Cody, and I knew there was also another side to Mike.

Mike might never have acted on his feelings towards me in that way, but that was because he didn't know how I felt towards him, either. Plus, he was still giving me the space he knew I needed to get over Cody first. But, as I had said, I had seen Mike at his most confident, when he had been pursuing something that he had wanted... and at that moment, he had reminded me very much of Cody.

But then there were also many differences, too. One being that Mike was open and honest about his feelings and intentions. He was a lot less complicated than Cody, but that wasn't exactly hard. I was beginning to grow tired of all the issues that he had, and all the problems he was causing in my life. I might still have loved him more than I would ever love anyone else, but he obviously didn't have feelings for me anymore. It was then that I realised it might have been time to finally pull myself together, and move on.

* * *

When I saw Mike again a few hours later, I saw him in a completely different light than I had before. I had always thought he was cute, but now I actually had butterflies in my stomach as I watched him smile at me. I realized then that he had a special smile just for me.

"Morning Jules", he said cheerful as always, "I saved you a seat. Did you sleep well?"

I stared at him, not being able to look away from his bright blue gaze. I had a flashback suddenly, remembering the way it felt to have his lips on mine, his hands roaming my body, how it felt to be with him. I blushed and my lips formed a small smile on their own accord. Mike cocked his head and looked at me curiously. His eyes sparkled and his lips formed a sexy grin.

"I did actually, I had an amazing dream," I responded to his playful mood and the tension that now existed between us. We still stared in to each other's eyes.

"Oh?" He said, while leaning towards me. "Tell me about it. Was it about me?" He chuckled when my blush deepened. "Good! I dream about you all the time, gorgeous. It's about time it was the other way around," He tossed me a bright smile, "Is there any way we are going to re-enact that dream of yours in real life?

I swallowed. I had wanted Mike to act more confident towards me and now I had my wish granted. I couldn't believe how much more attractive this made him.

We both turned around when I heard Jack shout Mike's name. I waved at him and Mike signaled that he would be with him in a second. He turned his full attention back to me.

"So it looks like I have to go now. We'll continue this conversation some other time ok?" His voice was so relaxed, but his eyes told a different story. There was a promise in them, a promise that he wouldn't forget what just happened, a promise that the hunt was open as far as he was concerned.

He stood up and leaned towards me. For a second I thought he was going to kiss me, but his lips went to my ear, whispering, "Make sure you remember that dream, gorgeous. Dreams tell you what you really want." And then he was gone.

* * *

Mike

I walked away grinning, my mind still on the blush on Julia's cheeks. It must have been one hell of a dream if it had completely changed the way she saw me... but I most definitely wasn't going to complain. I wanted her. I had since the moment I had laid eyes on her, so even if I was only going to get one night to be with her, I was happy. She was such a tease, so I couldn't wait to see what she was like when she finally lost control. Pissing off Cody would be a major bonus. It wasn't like I was expecting anything serious to happen between us. Contrary to what she and many others believed, I wasn't in love with her. But like I had said, it didn't mean I didn't want her.

Truthfully, I knew Julia better than she knew herself... and I knew that she was the kind of girl that always fell for the wrong guy. She might have complained about the way Cody had acted towards her, but we both knew deep down inside that was what she wanted. She needed the drama, tension, and the highs and lows that came with it. Now that Cody was no longer giving her what she wanted, she was looking somewhere else for the same kind of relationship... and that somewhere else was me. That didn't bother me in the slightest. Friends with benefits were the way forward, especially when they looked like Julia did.

"Hey man," Jack spoke up as I reached him, "What the hell is going on between you and our favorite redhead?"

I grinned triumphantly as I replied, "She had a dream about me and now she wants me," I punched Jack on the shoulder, "I am so gonna win this bet."

So perhaps that part was best kept quiet when Julia finally let go and gave me some.

* * *

Jack

I chuckled, shaking my head back and forth as I watched Mike smirking at me. He thought he was winning the bet? He had no idea...

Being pretty close to Cody, I knew a lot more than Mike ever would. I knew for a fact that this new attitude Cody was walking around was completely fake. The reason he was acting like an ass was because he was trying to hide the fact that he was still desperately in love with Julia. He also hadn't been watching Cody's face only moments earlier when he and her had been flirting. The jealous, murderous gaze he had sent his way had made me cringe.

I sighed to myself, if Cody and Julia loved each other, then I had to do something to help them, not be pissing around trying to sleep with her and make things even worse in the process. Despite never liking any of this happily ever after stuff, I wanted my friends to be happy, and the only way that was going to happen was when they were together.

Besides, what was the point of continuing this bet, when I didn't really want anything from it? Julia was a great friend, and yeah, she was drop dead gorgeous… but I didn't want anything other than friendship with her. The minute I slept with her, everything would just get fucked up. Julia came with complications, and I wanted my life simple. To be honest, this was the reason I had never even tried to kiss her.

Still, it would be interesting to see what happened if Mike would win. I knew what he was like. He had the tendency to fall in love easily, and I knew that it wouldn't take long for that exact thing to happen after he'd slept with Julia.

* * *

Julia:

I stared at Mike after he left. He had just turned into a completely different person overnight. But then again, maybe the change was just in me; maybe it meant I was finally getting over Cody. But when Mike had left the room with Jack, I looked the other way and saw Cody stare at me. He made me nervous with that look; he looked so sad and so angry at the same time. When he noticed I had seen him, he turned away quickly, a fake smile already plastered on his face. I sighed; Cody just didn't make any sense.

"Hey Julia." Randy sat down next to me. "I see you have a lot of admirers."

I smiled at him. "I know; I collect them. Do you want to join the club?"

"I have to check with my wife first. I'll get back to you on that…" He flashed me a quick grin, before all traces of humor left his face, "but seriously Julia, you have to make a choice. It's not fair of you to lead them on."

"Randy! I am not leading anyone on!" I hissed at him. "I can't believe you would think that."

The chair I sat on fell down when I stomped out the breakfast room. I could feel that people were looking at me, but I didn't care. Who did he think he was, talking to me like that? I wasn't leading anyone on, right?

"Julia," Randy had caught up with me and grabbed my arm with barely any time to spare. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean it like that."

I turned around abruptly and glared at him. "Then please tell me how you meant it. It seemed pretty clear to me."

"I just… err… you know…"

"I don't know Randy!" I spat out every word. "Who am I leading on exactly and why do you assume it is any of your business even if I was?"

He sighed. "You know who I am talking about."

"No, I don't! So be my guest and tell me."

"Mike… Jack… and Cody of course." Randy talked slowly like I was some kind of idiot.

"You are an idiot, Randy." I pricked my finger in his chest with every word I spoke. "And you would have known if you had just asked me things instead of jumping to conclusions. If you stopped acting like my older brother for a moment and started acting like the friend I thought you were, you might have known that Jack and I are just friends. What will happen between me and Mike is a still mystery, but I can't wait to find out! And let's talk about your precious Cody, should we?"

I was shouting so loud now, even Randy was cringing, "He is the one who has been leading me on from the beginning. He made me fall for him, sleep with him, and then when he'd got what he wanted, he dumped me immediately after. He has barely spoken to me in a month and still he doesn't even have the decency to give me the chance to get over him. Can you explain why he only shows interest in me when I'm with another man?" Tears were falling freely now, and I knew they weren't just to do with my anger.

"Julia," He sighed, inching closer to me, "I didn't know, I'm so sorry. I just saw you with Mike and with the way Cody looked... he's just been a mess for months now, and everyone heard the rumors about you and Jack, so I guess I jumped to conclusions." He put his hands on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes. "But… if you still like Cody, why are you flirting with Mike?"

"Because I'm sick and tired of Cody and his attitude," I sniffed, "Yes, I still love him, but he obviously doesn't feel anything for me, so I decided to get over him once and for all. And Mike is a great guy, he's kind and sweet and funny and really attractive and he doesn't have any of the issues that Cody has. He makes me feel good Randy, and that's what I need."

The sound of someone scraping his throat made me jump. This was not the sort of conversation that I wanted to be overheard. When I looked up, straight into the azure eyes of Cody, who was standing there next to Ted, I cringed. I couldn't read the expression on his face; I couldn't tell how much he had heard.

"Randy, we need to go now," Cody said without taking his eyes off me.

"Cody… hi… " I started to take a step towards him, drawn to him like a moth to a flame, but Cody had already stalked off with Ted. I looked to Randy, desperation seeping in.

"Do you think he heard all that? Oh Randy, what am I going to do now?"

Randy shook his head. "Don't worry; he might not have caught everything. I'll talk to him ok?"

"No! Just leave it. If I want to get over him, I have to learn to let things go." I looked at my watch. "I have to go Randy, I'm running really late. I'll see you at the airport later. We're going to Australia!" I plastered a big smile on my face trying to mimic my mood from last night.

Randy looked at me searchingly, before pulling me in for a hug. "That's a good girl; don't worry, be happy, right?" He chuckled. "And Julia… you're right. Mike is not a bad guy; he reminds me a little of me. But he'll have to answer to me, if he ever hurts you. You can tell him that."

"Bye Randy." I actually walked away smiling. Randy could always cheer me up.

* * *

**I can't say it enough… reviews are greatly appreciated, even the bad ones :) Oh and any requests / plot ideas are welcome… You never know, I might do something with it. **


	7. First Class

**A/N And here's the next already. For the moment no more Mike (yeah I'm sorry too, but he will be back), but a lot of Cody and a little bit of Jack and most of all, loads and loads of drama. I loved writing the last chapter; it was so much fun, so I'm so excited that you guys thought it was funny too. I try to bring back more fun later on. **

**Thank you**** lknight91, kristi, Legacychick and Volcomstonebabe, **YouCantSeeMe.x, miamitravel and GreyLionDiva for the reviews of the last chapter. And most of all thanks to my beta-reader chaingangprincess, without you this story wouldn't be half as good. 

**I hope to update soon again, but I have so much to rewrite and so little time to do it (I hate work: why can't they just let me write in piece) and there are my other stories which need attention (especially Another World (Randy/OC), please read it and let me know what you think. I think Play the Game is rubbish myself, so I think I will remove it soon and just keep writing it for my own pleasure -it's where I put all my Nick Nemeth fantasies, yummie, I love him - without the pressure to make it any good). Ok enough blabbering... It's obvious time to go to sleep now. **

******Anyway, read, enjoy and afterwards I would appreciate reviews again.**  


**Chapter 7 First Class**

Julia

Hanging with Jack had major advantages. With his smile and attitude he managed to get the two of us into first class for the long flight to Sydney for the yearly Australia tour. The rest of the crew, divas and superstars flew coach or business class. We stood to board the plane before any of the others, and as we did, the hair on the back of my neck began to stand on end, and without even looking, I could feel that Jack and I were being watched. While our tickets were being processed, I took a quick peak around Jack's huge frame, and was surprised that it was two pairs of gorgeous blue eyes that were watching us, not just one. The first pair I noticed looked so upset that I had to force myself to look away. I couldn't stand seeing such a depressed look on his face. The second pair, on the other hand, made me smile. Mike's amused gaze stared back at me, and I could have sworn I saw a sparkle of something. Whatever it was, it sent a shiver down my spine...

A few minutes later, when we were comfortably sitting in our luxurious seats, strapped in for takeoff, Jack leaned towards me, a flirtatious look in his eyes, his trademark smile on his face.

"So Julia, a kiss would be an appropriate reward for this fine accomplishment."

I looked at him with fake disgust. "If you think I would ever kiss a hairy, oversized barbarian like you, you are wrong. Don't you ever shave?" I traced my hand over the stubbles on his face.

He just laughed. "You forgot insanely handsome, impossible strong and smart as hell." Wow, could this man be any cockier? I rolled my eyes at him.

"Come on girl. Everybody thinks we're doing it. Why not give it a try? It's going to be worth it, I promise."

I frowned, finding it hard now to work out if he was being serious or not. Did everyone really think he and I were having sex? Although, when he was acting like this, I couldn't help but wonder why I wasn't... this arrogant Jack was extremely attractive.

"Don't you want to be a member of the mile high club?"

I just smiled. I already was. It was a little souvenir from my fling with Dolph Ziggler, but I wasn't going to let Jack into that secret. Anyway, if it wasn't that I didn't want Jack to mess with my already crazy life right now, I would have given into him without any bribes.

Loving Cody and having a crush on Mike all of a sudden were enough to keep my mind and heart busy. I still couldn't get Cody's saddened gaze from my mind. Why did Cody have to act like this, just when I was thinking about moving on? I felt defeated and confused.

"Hey what's wrong?" Jack said, sensing my mood. "Not still hung up on Mr. Rhodes?" He frowned, seeing the look in my eyes, "I see," He was quiet for a while. The second the seatbelt signs went off, he left without saying a word, leaving me behind, lost in my own thoughts.

* * *

Cody

I didn't think I would even be the same again. I never had any patience for people feeling depressed. I always thought they just had to pull themselves together, stop whining and move on with their lives. But now I knew how it felt to hate yourself, to feel like you'll never be happy again, to know deep down that you're a really bad person. For the past six months I felt like I was empty inside, filled only by a black cloud of despair. I lived my life in a daze. I couldn't enjoy the things I had loved before. My performances in the ring were bleak; I could barely pull anything off anymore. If Randy, Ted and my father hadn't vowed for me, I would probably have been fired already. I couldn't care less. I didn't care about anything anymore. Nothing except for Julia, anyway.

I had closed myself away from most people, trying to act like the person I had been before. That's where the cocky attitude came in handy. Well, it was good for people who didn't know me so well. They expected that from me all the time... but as for the ones who were close to me, it didn't fool them at all. Ted didn't even ask. He had never been much of a talker. He hung close to me, though. He had meant it literally when he had said that he'd have my back from now on. I appreciated this, I didn't want to talk, but it felt good to have my best friend at my side, knowing that he would listen to me the moment I finally decided to open up.

Randy did try to talk to me; he tried it the nice way and he tried to bully it out off me, but I just told him to fuck off. The asshole then asked my brother to talk to me, and later even my father. I could easily tell Dustin to fuck off as well, but that didn't work with my father. I couldn't tell him the truth; my father would not understand how I could feel like this over a girl. He wouldn't understand the bigger problem either. It wasn't just about Julia anymore; it was about me being a bad man, a man who didn't deserve to be happy, a man the world would have been better off without.

I had wanted to talk to Julia. She kept trying for months... but I just couldn't have her that close. I wanted to protect her from me, and I wanted to protect myself. I couldn't be just friends with her, I needed to be with her, but that would be egocentric. So I decided that she needed space to get away from me. A better man would've been happy now she was doing just that, getting it on with Jack... or was it Mike now? After seeing her flirt with that jack-ass this morning, I wasn't so sure. Either way, I wasn't happy, like I should be. The only thing I could feel was jealousy.

For me, this just proved how much of a jerk I was. I still felt ashamed about how I gave her permission to be with Jack; like I had anything to say in the matter, like she would really care about what I thought. I could see that she pitied me. Ted told me that wasn't true, that she was worried about me, but I had asked him to stay out of this. And then I overheard some of her conversation with Randy this morning, and I was even more confused and jealous than before. I had thought that Jack and Mike were friends, so I couldn't understand why Mike was trying to steal Julia away from Jack. I could only hope that Jack would win that battle. I didn't think I would be able to live in a world in which my girl - I still thought about her like that - would hook up with a clown like Mike.

I was pondering over this while boarding the airplane to Sydney. It was typical that Jack was the only one to get first class. I couldn't keep from staring at him and the red-headed beauty -my red-headed beauty - as they stood and made their way over to board. I tried to forget about everything once I was finally on the plane myself... thankfully, over the past few months, I'd become pretty good at keeping my mind blank. Now that I was no longer thinking of Julia, or Jack, or Mike, and realising that I was going to have nothing to do for the next fourteen hours that the plane was going to be in the air, I quickly fell asleep.

I woke up shortly after, startled by a nudge from Ted. When I opened my eyes I saw Jack glaring at me.

"I'm so sick of you two whining about each other. Now go up there before I change my mind again. I can't believe I'm actually giving away a very comfortable seat for an idiot like you. I would have brought her over here, but I don't think the flight attendants will find it funny when I carry a screaming woman through the plane."

I didn't really understand what was going on, so I just stared at him.

"Come on Cody, how thick can you be? Go get that girl, or I swear, I will carry you over there myself."

Slowly I understood what he was talking about. I frowned at him, wondering why he was even doing this. Weren't he and Julia together, kind of? Not knowing what else to do, I shrugged my shoulders, before pulling myself up from the seat. I cringed as I noticed the audience we had from the other passengers, and decided on a quick reply.

"Thanks man, I think," I sighed quietly, before I picked up my feet and made myself down the plane towards the first class seats, feeling nothing but insecure the entire way.

* * *

Julia

"Hey," he said, "Err, Can I sit down?"

I opened my eyes and looked at him with a bewildered expression in my eyes. "Sure, but how…? Why…?"

"Jack forced me," he must have realised how stupid he sounded, because his eyes grew wide and he quickly added some more before I had chance to speak, "But I'm glad he did. This is much more comfortable." He stretched his long legs out in front of him as he took the seat, trying to make a joke to break the tension.

He failed miserably. I actually trembled from the tension between us. He clearly took this the wrong way, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I'll go now." He stood up quickly, but before he could disappear, I took his hand.

"You could never scare me, Codes." He sat down again, softly caressing the palm of my hand with his thumb. He failed to look me in the eyes.

"I don't understand," His voice barely more than a whisper, "Did you break up with Jack?"

I sighed. "There is nothing going on between me and Jack. There never was and there never will be." I was glad he didn't mention Mike. I wouldn't have know what to say then.

He looked at me then, still not believing what I was telling him. "But everybody said, Mike told me…"

"When did you start listening to anything Mike says, Cody?" I shook my head, trying to get my mind around what was happening right now. I desperately needed to know what Cody was doing here. And even more I wanted to know how much of my conversation with Randy he had overheard. I hoped he hadn't heard me shout about him and I really hoped he hadn't heard me talking about Mike. Though if he had, wouldn't he have mentioned Mike instead of Jack?

One thing was for sure, I was going to be having words with Mike later on. I could have killed him for what he had done; he knew very well what the situation was between me and Jack. Although I guess, what Mike and I had was a completely different story, I'd even admitted that to Randy... but now, with Cody sat beside me, holding my hand; everything I felt for Mike disappeared from my mind completely.

"But Jack, he is…"

I interrupted him, "If you want me to be with him, tell me now. He just proposed introducing me to the mile high club. I can always take his offer." I'll be the first to admit that my ability to joke was a bit impaired as well.

He grabbed my hand tight, "No, don't."

We were silent for a while, still holding hands. I was just about to speak up when an unfamiliar voice burst our silent bubble.

"Cody Rhodes! It's really you. Can I please have your autograph?" I almost laughed out loud, seeing what was clearly a businessman in a very expensive suit beaming at Cody. "It's for my kids," He added, "Is Randy Orton on the plane too by any chance? My wife would love his picture."

Cody signed the autographs, let me take a picture of the man and him and just pointed to the business class, "You will find everyone you like down there, just don't tell them you got that from me." The man nodded a thank you, and began to walk over, but Cody shouted after him with an afterthought, "Do me one favor, mate. Pretend you don't recognize the Miz."

We looked at each other smiling, some of the tension gone now.

"How are you really doing Cody? You've been avoiding me."

He looked away, but I laid my hand against his cheek, turning his face back towards me. I didn't want to give him the chance to get away again.

"I'm fine." He clearly lied.

"You don't look fine." I was getting angry now.

"It's none of your business." He said that between clenched teeth. That stung, if he didn't want to talk, what was he doing here? I let go of his face and turned away, not wanting him to see the tears in my eyes.

"Julia," his voice was soft now, "It's for your own good. You're better off not caring about me. I'm no good. I hurt you before. I don't want to do that again." It was his turn to cup my face, turning my face towards him. I could see from the pain in his eyes that he'd let all his guards down now. This was all because of my stupid mouth. He had heard me before, and now he was punishing himself because I had said I couldn't move on.

"Do you really think that Cody? That you're a bad guy?"

He only nodded. I couldn't bear to believe what he was saying. I cried about this, tears streaming down my face.

There were tears in his eyes now too. "Please don't cry. I can't bear to see you like this. I never meant to hurt you. I only want you to be happy."

I reached for his hand. "Do you have any idea how much it hurts me to see you like this Cody? I know you're hurting like hell, but you won't let me in. You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to, but please talk to someone. Talk to Ted, talk to Randy." I was pleading with him now. "I thought we were supposed to be friends?"

I hoped we could be a hell of a lot more than friends, but I was too afraid to admit this. If he turned me down, I didn't want this to happen in an plane. I wanted it to happen somewhere that I could cry my eyes out afterwards.

I was suddenly aware again that a plane wasn't exactly the right place for this discussion, either. Jack was a moron. He could have conspired his little plan to get us together somewhere a little more private. Then again, he probably thought we would just kiss, make up, and that would be it. If it were only that simple.

"I don't think I can be friends with you." He sounded harsh, seemingly having taken my silence to collect himself. He put his walls back up. I was sure that he was going to reject me right now.

"Then what the hell are you doing here?" I was not going to let him get away that easy. "Why do you have to torture me like this?" I wiped my tears away, glaring at him.

"I'm a jerk, remember."

I surprised myself, not just Cody, when I slapped him in the face. "I never want to hear you say that about yourself again Cody," I hissed at him, my hands half way between him and me, wondering what I should do, "You might act like a jerk, but I know you're not, so just drop the act and tell me what you want from me."

"You are really going to force this out of me, aren't you? Look who's torturing who now? You are the one that is hurting me just by existing." I was not the only one who was angry now. "I can't even stand to look at you." Ouch again. "I wish I never met you."

I didn't really understand where any of this was coming from. Before I could think of a way to respond, or to even think... his lips came crashing down against my own.

It was a desperate kiss, deep and longing, both of us clinging to the other. It was a completely different kiss than the last one we had shared, but this was a completely different Cody. For a moment I forgot about everything. I was at the one place I wanted to be, the only place I ever belonged... I was in his arms.

A second later, and it was all over. He slowly pushed me away. "I'm sorry Julia; I didn't mean to throw myself at you. I didn't want to make things more difficult for you," He looked devastated as he closed his eyes, and began to say his next words. "I love you, Julia, so much... but I can never be with you." And with those words left to linger, he walked away.

"I love you too Cody." I whispered. He didn't hear me, he was already too far away.

* * *

Cody

I couldn't bring myself to go back to my original seat. I couldn't face Jack, or anyone else for that matter, after what I had just done. I still couldn't get my head around it. After everything, after working so hard to stay away from her for the last six months... I'd just gone and put myself back in square one. Actually, it was even worse this time. Not only had I sprang the fact that I loved her on her, but I'd also told her that I couldn't be with her, either. God, I was so stupid. My heart felt like it had been torn from my chest at the thought of it all.

I wanted to blame Jack. I wanted to storm over to where he was sat and beat the living hell out of him, to scream at him about how this was all his fault. If he hadn't had thrown us together like this, then I would have still been asleep...

But it wasn't Jack's fault. I should have had a little more self control. I knew what would happen, yet I still allowed myself to go and talk to her.

I shook my head back and forth, realising for the first time that I just couldn't do this anymore. I wasn't strong enough to be around her, not when I felt so strongly, yet I could do nothing about it. There was only one option that I had that I could think of right now... and that was asking Vince to allow me to move to Smackdown. I knew it'd do nothing for my career, especially when I'd have to leave behind Legacy... but I just didn't care anymore. I had no desire to follow my lifelong dream now. All I wanted was for Julia to be happy... and there was no way that was going to happen while I was there. She'd even said that herself.

It took another ten minutes for me to pull myself together enough to make my way back to my seat. Or so I had thought. The second I laid eyes on Jack and Ted, I could feel tears brimming my eyes. I hadn't felt this emotional before in my life...

"How did it go?" Jack asked hopefully.

"Mission failed," I shook my head, barely being able to get any words out before my emotions got the better of me. I felt Ted's hand clasp a hold of my shoulder in comfort as I crumpled down beside him and cried.


	8. Down Under

**A/N Sorry it took so long for me to update this. It had nothing to do with the strike, but for more than a week i could not get anything written, so I gave myself some days off writing and luckily it worked. It's all going smoothly now, so i hope to get the next chapter up pretty soon. **

**In this one there is a little bit of everyone, but some more Mike than the others. **

**I'm really sorry Legacychick, I know you want Cody, but I like Mike a little more right now :p But don't worry, Julia seems to have a mind of her own, so Cody will be back soon.**********

******Anyway, thanks for the reviews, please keep reviewing, I love that!**

**Chapter 8 - Down under**

Julia

For the majority of the flight, I had cried on Jack's shoulder. Any attempt of him to get me to talk about what happened, had only resulted in me bursting into tears all over again. I knew Jack was very uncomfortable being forced into this role; joking around to cheer me up was usually his thing; holding me when I cried had always been Mike's part in our threesome. To be honest, I had wished that I could have Mike there with me, but it didn't seem fair towards him. Now things between Mike and me were changing; I wanted to keep Cody out of anything I did with him from now on. If it had been possible I would have gone to Randy, who was the second best choice when it came to cheering me up, but I couldn't pull myself together enough to go to him, or even to ask Jack to get him for me.

When I got off the plane I could feel people staring at me: how could they not? I was still crying, my eyes hurt and must be red and puffy and I could barely stand on my own legs anymore. Several others stared at Cody, who hurried off with Ted and Randy trailing behind him. For just one second I caught his eyes; he looked as miserable as I did.

Mike hurried towards Jack and me. "Jules, what's wrong?" His voice was soft with concern. He pulled me in for a hug. For one moment I let myself sink against his warm body, allowing myself to feel better, then I pulled back again. I didn't want to take a step back with Mike...

"I don't want to bother you with this, Mike. Trust me, it's better for us. I'll talk to you tomorrow ok?"

He started to shake his head, but I turned away from him and Jack and I started to walk to the baggage reclaim on my own. By the time I had collected my bag, my friend Sarah had caught up with me. I smiled through my tears when I saw her. A female friend was just what I needed right now. With her spending almost all her free time with Evan, and me hanging with Jack and Mike all the time, we hadn't seen each other as much as we used to, but as always, my best friend was there when I needed her the most.

By the time we arrived in the hotel, my tears had dried at last and I could finally talk again. I told her everything that had happened; starting with the dream I had had about Mike and ending with Cody telling me he loved me, but that he couldn't be with me. After I was finished, Sarah sat silently for a few moments, trying to take everything in, before she asked me this.

"What do you want? Or should I ask, who do you want?"

"I don't know…" I shook my head, "I... I want Cody. I love him, and he…" I stammered.

"Be honest with yourself Julia; you barely know Cody, and he has been an ass for most of that time," Sarah interrupted me.

"I know, I know… but I've also seen another side to him. He can be an amazing guy!" I defended Cody with fierce passion.

"Cody is trouble, Julia; you know that, all he has ever done is hurt you. Look at yourself right now. One talk and you are heart-broken all over again. And right now he is a mess… and he even told you he doesn't want to be with you… don't you think it's time for you to move on?"

"So you think I should go for Mike then?" I asked her.

She surprised me when she shook her head. "I don't think Mike is the great guy you think he is. I didn't want to tell you this, since I thought you weren't serious about Mike or Jack, but…"

"But what?" I snapped, "Mike is one of my best friends. He is always here for me."

"I know girl…" She looked at me with pity in her eyes. "But did you know Jack and he have an outstanding bet over who will be the first to sleep with you?"

"They have WHAT!?" I nearly screamed now. "Who told you this?"

Sarah looked serious. "Evan told me. Apparently they joke about it a lot. It might be only a joke, it's hard to tell with them, but I think it's serious."

"No," I furiously shook my head. "I can't believe it. Not from these guys. They are my best friends. Mike has never tried anything with me, and even Jack hasn't really, not seriously. It has only ever been a joke." And although I meant my words, I couldn't keep the doubt from seeping in; could everything have been a game a get me into bed?

_A few days later__..._

Cody

I felt stupid for telling Ted what I wanted to do. I should've known Randy would bully it out of him. I didn't blame Ted though; I probably would have down the same thing, if it had been the other way around. Randy was pacing back and forth in front of me, anger flashing from his eyes.

"I will not let you ruin your career. I will not let you leave for Smackdown and I certainly won't let you leave the company. I will call your father; I will even call Vince if I have to. I will not let you lose everything over a woman. Either you decide to be with her, or you get over her. Just make a choice. It's that simple Cody. It's not like she doesn't want you."

I was furious. I hadn't expected him to act this difficult. Actually, I had expected it, but I guess I'd just hoped that he wouldn't. And it was so obvious that he didn't understand anything about what I was going through. Simple… nothing was simple anymore. He sounded exactly like Jack when he acted like this, and it was this easygoing side of my friends I was insanely jealous of.

"My career is my business, Randy. Right now I don't care about it. Wouldn't you do everything that's needed to protect Samantha?" I tried to get him to understand. I couldn't do this without their support; I needed my friends to stand by me. But I could see they didn't know what I was talking about.

"I don't understand why you think you need to leave Cody," Ted pleaded with me. "Why can't you just be with her? Everyone can see how much she loves you."

"I just can't," I nearly screamed now. "I will only hurt her again. I can't trust myself around her, around any woman."

"So that's what's been bothering you. Codes," Randy said. He slumped down on the bed and hung his head. His voice had lost all vigor. Understanding dawned in his eyes.

Ted looked devastated. He actually had tears in his eyes. I couldn't believe that I had hurt my friends so bad. I turned my back on Ted and Randy. The pain I caused them was too much to bear; my entire body ached from the effort that it took to contain my sobs.

Ted put his hand on my shoulder. "Codes… you can't really believe that. You're my best mate Cody… I _know_ you, man, I _know_ you. You're a good guy. You can't still be thinking about that. It happened such long time ago."

"It was a one-time thing, and nothing happened in the end. I'm sorry we gave you such a hard time back then. We all acted on our emotions." Randy added this, his voice weak but sincere.

Ted again, "Why are you so convinced that you are the bad guy? You were drunk that night."

I shook his hand from my shoulder, turned around and glared at him. "Alcohol just lessens your inhibitions. That means the guy who almost hit her is somewhere in me." I still remembered every word of what she said to me.

"I am a violent man, guys. I will not risk the woman I love for my own personal gain."

I didn't give them the chance to answer. I left the room and slammed the door behind me.

* * *

_Meanwhile,__ on the beach__..__._

Julia

"I really don't see what the problem is," Jack said when he rubbed sunscreen lotion on my back. We were enjoying a few hours of rest on our foreign tour. I was glad it was just him and me; I desperately needed someone to cheer me up.

"He loves you. You love him. Do the math."

I turned to look at him. "Is your life really that simple?"

He grinned. "It's even simpler than that. If I want a woman, I sleep with her. If she's any good, I'll sleep with her again. And that's it as far as I'm concerned. No need to mess up a perfectly enjoyable life by falling in love." He stretched his long body. "Right now I see a lot of women I'd like to screw. God, I love Australia. It's even better than California."

As he spoke those words, he started to rub my legs. "I can do my legs myself, Jack." I tried to get away from his hands.

"I know you can… but it's a lot more fun for the both of us when I do it." He chuckled, meanwhile continuing what he was doing. His hands slowly massaged my legs and the cold of his hands combined with the warmth of my skin gave me shivers. The bet suddenly slipped into my mind; had I seen things like this as only a joke, simply because I wasn't really into him?

"You'll never give up, do you?"

"Never. Not until I have you in my bed." He suddenly slipped his hands into my bikini bottoms and grabbed my butt. "Though it doesn't need to be a bed for me. Come on, Julia, nobody needs to know."

I slapped his hands away. "As if you wouldn't be boasting about it to anyone who wants to hear."

He laughed out loud now. "You know me too well. Still if that's what it takes, I might be able to keep my mouth shut. Don't say you're not a little bit tempted, Julia."

I sat up suddenly and leaned towards him, so I sat between his legs. I had decided to play his game along for a moment. I wanted to find out about the bet, and I wanted to know before I saw Mike again.

"I don't think you can handle me, Jack. I think… that you are nothing but talk." I smiled seductively and wrapped my hands in his hair. His eyes widened now I had turned things around so suddenly.

His hands slipped around my waist, pulling me close. Slowly he brought his face closer to mine, until our lips were only an inch apart. His eyes bore into mine. Just when his lips were about to touch mine, I realized I really didn't want this; It didn't feel right; there was no tension, no need; it would be like kissing my brother. I didn't want to go through with this, not even as a game. At the exact same moment that this thought hit me, he shook his head.

"No Julia, this is not going to happen." He put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me away a bit.

Though I was having second thoughts as well, I couldn't help feeling insulted. He had been trying to get me here for months and now he could have finally had me, he turned me down. I glared at him.

"Don't get angry Julia. It would only mess up our friendship. Not that I'm not curious at how it would be, I just like things uncomplicated. And there's nothing simple when it comes to you." He grinned at me, begging for forgiveness.

"You are an ass. Don't you dare act like I'm a drama queen. I can't help it that all men are idiots." I punched him on his shoulder. I grinned when he winced. "And anyway, Jack," I added casually, "don't you have some sort of bet to win?" I looked closely at his face to take in his reaction. He looked away from me, the smile on his face gone now.

"So it's true. You and Mike have a bet over who will be the first to get me?" If looks could kill, Jack would have dropped dead on the spot. "I thought you two were my friends Jack, I trusted you, I can't believe everything was fake."

"Hey Julia, don't act crazy now." He grabbed me by the shoulders, forcing me to look him in the eyes. I fought to get away from him, I was still sitting between his legs and I couldn't stand being so close to him anymore, but of course I didn't stand a chance against my huge friend.

"Of course we are your friends. That bet is just a joke between us; a really old joke that is. We made it when we had only just met you, before we were even friends with you." He chuckled, "Just be honest Julia, neither Mike of I have ever really tried anything with you."

I couldn't stay mad at him when he was grinning at me like that; not now I believed him. Jack was one of the most honest people I knew. He believed that lying would always cause problems, and his entire life focused on steering away from trouble.

"Ok, I believe you. You're sure the same goes for Mike?" Jack nodded.

"Good, because since you failed to live up to the expectations, I need to look for something else to take my mind of Cody."

He lifted me so I sat next to him and handed me the bottle of sunscreen lotion so I could do his back.

"So we're back to Mr. Rhodes again, aren't we?" He was serious now. "I really meant it when I said that I don't understand what the problem is with you two. I can see it's eating both of you alive. Just go and talk to him."

I shook my head. "That got us nowhere last time, remember?"

Jack was curious now. "What happened back there? You didn't tell me anything then... and Cody is even more close-lipped than usual."

I felt tears in my eyes even from thinking back to the flight. "I don't really know. We were talking, I slapped him…"

"You slapped him?" Jack's eyes grew wide.

"I just couldn't take all the bad things he was saying about himself anymore. And I couldn't take it that he was back to being cocky Cody again. Every time he shows me who he really is; what really is bothering him, he just hides behind his attitude all over again. The worst thing is that I know how depressed he is, anyone can see that. One moment he's pouring his heart out, and a second later he acts all defensive again. Then he called himself a jerk and I just snapped."

"Did you figure out why he feels this bad? I really want to help him, but he won't talk and I don't understand what is bothering him."

"You remember that night when he almost hit me months ago?"

Jack nodded.

"I think he's gotten it in his pigheaded mind that he's really bad news and now he wants to protect me from himself. I think it's my fault, too. I told him something like that back then. I didn't mean it. I only wanted to hurt him. And you know what? It wasn't even about him almost hitting me. I don't really think he would've done that anyway. It was about him choosing those other girls over me and him telling me he thought I was easy." I really cried now. Jack put his arm around me.

"Did you at least tell him how you feel about him?" He spoke quietly, rubbing circles on my back soothingly.

I shook my head. "He told me he wished we never met and then kissed me, told me he loved me and walked away. I haven't talked to him since."

Jack seemed amazed, shaking his head. "Please remind me of this if I ever decide to fall in love." Afterwards, we barely even spoke to each other. Each of us were far too wrapped up in our own thoughts to start another conversation.

* * *

That night after the show I didn't feel like going out along with everybody else. I was exhausted from the jet lag, not to mention from the many nights of sleep I had missed as of late. I knew I would be extremely lucky if I would get any sleep tonight... my mind was running haywire like usual, but I could still give it my best shot.

I was broken by the emotions of the last few days. The conversation I had with Cody had brought along so much pain, longing and confusion. I had thought I was getting over him; I had thought the wounds were healing, but nothing was less true. If he hadn't kissed me or told me that he loved me, I might have been able to accept that we were over; that we would never be together. But now? If I could only convince him he wasn't the bad guy that he thought he was, we might have a chance.

But then there was Mike. Ever since I had dreamt about him, I couldn't stop thinking about him. He was quite the opposite of Cody, who was avoiding me. Instead, Mike found me on every possible occasion. I was working on his storyline now, so this meant we had to spend a lot of time together anyway.

The relaxed atmosphere that had always existed between us was gone now, replaced by a feeling of anticipation. Everything he said to me had a hidden meaning. Sometimes, especially when it was just us, the insinuations were almost out in the open. When we were with others, he was really subtle; the invitation was really only visible for me, hidden in the expression of his blue eyes.

The way he flirted and joked with me left me tongue-tied most of the time. I wasn't used to not having a way to respond to anyone and this only built the tension between us even more. Mike was the only one who could take my mind off of Cody. Mike was so happy, carefree and open that worrying was impossible when I was around him. For the first time I truly understood why Cody and Mike hated each other like they did... they were complete opposites.

There was a knock on my door. I expected it to be Sarah or maybe Randy, who hadn't gone out either. Imagine my surprise when I saw Mike standing there, leaning casually against the wall, a huge smile on his face. As always, he seemed utterly comfortable with himself.

"Hey Mike, I thought you went clubbing with the rest of the guys?" My voice fluttered slightly. I tried to sound as relaxed as he looked, but I don't think I pulled it off very well.

He shrugged. "I just didn't feel like it anymore, not after I found out that you were staying behind, all alone in your room… so I decided to come here and keep you company." Once again his tone was light, but the meaning behind his innocent words was clear.

"Sure, I could use some company," I said lightly, in control of myself once again. "I don't think I can sleep anyway. Do you feel like watching a movie?"

He walked towards me without speaking, barely inches away as he looked down into my eyes. He was so close that he would only have to lower his head a few inches to kiss me. He looked utterly amused as he stared down at me. My eyes flickered to his lips and back to his eyes. A small smile formed on his lips. He had me where he wanted me, and he knew it.

"A movie, that sounds like fun." He chuckled and started to move away from me, but I let my arms slip around his neck and pulled him close. Suddenly I couldn't take his teasing anymore. I needed him to blow every thought, doubt and worry out of my system.

"Just kiss me Mike; I'm not in the mood for games."

He just looked at me, a huge smile growing across his lips. One arm slipped around my waist, the other cupped my face. His thumb stroked my cheekbone and I sighed under his tender touch... and then his lips touched mine and the surge of heat that flowed between us erased every conscious thought from my mind.

He let the kiss deepen and he opened his mouth slightly to explore my lips and mouth when I invited him in. His tongue found mine and we let them dance together passionately. My hands trailed across his back, taking in as much about him as they could. His hands stayed where they were; one on the small of my back, pulling me against him, the other wrapped in my hair, pulling me deeper into the kiss.

Minutes later he slowly ended the kiss. I didn't want to, I wanted it to go on forever, but he didn't allow me to take control. He looked at me with his head cocked, a devious smirk on his face and satisfaction blazing in his eyes.

"So, was that anything like your dream?"

I couldn't help laughing. Mike made everything fun. However, it did nothing to erase the sexual tension existing between us. I found it hard to concentrate from the look he was sending my way, and his hands that were still holding me close to him.

"Well… in my dream you didn't talk this much," I teased. "But you kiss even better than I could imagine, so I can't help wondering what else you have in store for me."

"I didn't talk?" He chuckled, "And you're sure that dream was about me?"

His hands played with my hair, caressed my neck and shoulders and then the side of my body, grazing my breasts. I closed my eyes and sighed under his touch. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen how sexy his joking was before... but I guess, he had never touched me like this before either.

"I've never seen someone look this hot in a pair of sweats. It makes me wonder how you look without them."

"Mike?" I looked into his bright blue eyes that were sparkling with both amusement and desire. "Shut up and kiss me." To re-enforce my order I grabbed his ass.

He gasped. This was something he hadn't expected from me and I was glad that I had managed to surprise him. His lips found mine again for another mind-blowing kiss. This time he didn't let me go. He slowly maneuvered us over to the bed; before he proceeded to show me just what else it was that he had in store for me.

An hour or so later, we were still entwined with each other underneath my covers. I was snuggled against him, my head on his shoulder, his arms around me, and my fingers were tracing his abs. Although he was one of my closest friends, and not to mention a man I hadn't even thought of as anything other than that friend until a few days before, I was completely at ease with what had just happened. I didn't understand how he did it, but Mike made everything easy. Even crossing this boundary in our friendship didn't change anything about how good he made me feel.

"So Mike, are you glad you won the bet?" I asked playful. He tensed for a moment, but quickly relaxed when he heard how light my tone was.

"I'm just glad I finally have you in my arms." He kissed me tenderly to show me that he meant his words. "Winning the bet is just a bonus. Who told you about that anyway? Please don't tell me Jack did. I know, it was obvious that you wanted me and not him, but still, that would have been cheating."

I giggled. "Sarah did. You guys told Evan. You should have known he's too lovesick to keep anything to himself."

"I'll kill him," Mike chuckled. "He could've ruined everything."

He rolled over on his side so that he was facing me. He pulled me close against his still naked body, my legs entwining with his. His lips melted against mine. It was a slow and deep kiss that I could feel deep in my body. I had never been kissed like this before. Every time his lips touched mine, I forgot everything around me.

"So Julia, tell me," he began with an unexpected serious undertone to his voice. "What do you want us to be?"

I tensed. "What? Isn't that supposed to be my thing to ask? And you should want to avoid that question for as long as possible." I tried to maintain the playful mood. This was not a question I wanted to answer.

Unfortunately, he didn't let himself get distracted by my joke. "Maybe... but I want us to be honest with each other. I won't play games, Julia. I have no intention to hurt you or to get hurt myself."

He brushed my hair out of my face and softly pecked my lips. The expression in his eyes was sincere and warm. "I won't lie to you Julia. I could fall in love with you, if I'd allow myself to it. And maybe even if I don't want to."

I pulled him close for a kiss. I wasn't prepared for so much honesty. I had no idea how to respond to this. I knew how to play games; in fact I was a master at that. His openness forced me to turn away from my usual act and made me give him an honest answer.

"Mike, I really don't know what I want. I like you. I like you so much. You are everything I could wish for in a man, but…" I was silent now. I didn't want to ruin this perfect night.

"I'm not Cody?"

Mike sighed, and I cringed, wondering what he must have been thinking. I had thought he would have expected something like that... he knew how I felt. I honestly wanted to forget about anyone else but him, I wanted to think of nothing but the man lay beside me, and what we had just shared together. I wouldn't blame Mike now, if he wanted this to end after tonight, especially considering what they both knew was the truth... but then again, after what he had only just asked, perhaps that wasn't the case. Perhaps Mike wanted something a little more serious than I had first thought.

"Mike," I sighed, stroking his cheek. "Don't think that. It feels so good to be with you... but I don't want to lie to you. You're right; I'm still in love with him. I wish I wasn't, I really do."

Thinking about Cody physically hurt me. I'm sure the pain showed in my eyes, because Mike softly stroked my cheek and pulled me close for another sweet kiss.

"I'm so sorry Mike. I wish I could tell you something else. You are so amazing. When I'm with you, I don't even think about him. You make me feel so good. I need you for that Mike. I need you to blow my mind away. You are the only one who can do that for me, but I don't think it's fair of me to ask that of you. I don't know what I can offer you. I can't promise you anything, not now, not yet, maybe not ever. Can't we just see what happens?" I looked into his eyes. I hoped this was enough for him.

Mike looked at me for a moment, before he kissed me and said, "Thank you, for telling me the truth. I don't think I could have done this again if you hadn't."

He threw me a dazzling grin, his playful mood back. "If I understand correctly, you want to use me for sex. I think I might be able to live with that… at least for now."

He kissed me once again. His lips were soft and warm on mine. I smiled against his lips, wondering how I had gotten so lucky... but it didn't take me long to forget everything as he pulled me closer and deeper in to the kiss... and we didn't let go again for a very long time.

* * *

**I wanted to write out the sex scenes, but I'm having some mayor writers block concerning those, so I just left them to your own imagination. I might add them later.******** I'll tell you if I do. **

**As always, reviews are greatly appreciated. **


	9. Secrets

**I promised you I would get this one up faster, didn't I? So enjoy. **

**Thank you all for the reviews and the fav's. There highly appreciated.**

Chapter 9 - Secrets

Julia

The sun shining right in my face woke me from a deep and dreamless sleep. I had slept better than I had in ages. When I slowly became aware of my surroundings, I realized that I was pulled protectively against a warm body. For one second I didn't understand who I was with... then I remembered everything that had happened last night. I wasn't prepared for the surge of guilt and anxiety that flowed through my body at these memories. Only one person crossed my mind; Cody! I completely tensed up and tried to slip away before Mike woke up, but that was to no avail. Before I had barely even moved, his arm tightened around my waist and his lips found my shoulder.

"Don't leave Jules, stay with me for a little while longer." The sound of Mike's still sleepy voice combined with the feeling of his lips on my body faded out all uneasiness and guilt and left only a feeling of contentment. I sank back in his arms and relaxed against his chest. We lay silently for minutes, arms and legs entwined. I was halfway back to dream world when he finally broke the silence.

"You know, it's always nice to wake up next to you, but somehow it's so much better today," Mike said with a smile in his voice. "I wonder why that is."

I giggled. "I think it's because Jack isn't here. I slept so much better without his snoring." I could feel the rumble of his silent laughter against my body. I turned on my back so I could look in his eyes. They shone brighter than ever, with no doubts or uncertainty visible there. A happy smile formed across his lips as he looked into my eyes, and his mouth found mine in a sweet kiss. Yet again, this made me forget about everything that wasn't him. The only thing that counted at that moment were his lips on mine and his hands roaming my body.

"Do you wanna take a shower with me, gorgeous?" He asked between two kisses, the desire blazing in his eyes.

I could only nod; my insides felt like they were made of hot liquid. After one last kiss, he disentangled himself from me and stood up, stretching his muscular body. I couldn't stop myself from checking him out. My eyes traveled from his legs all the way up to his eyes. I felt the heat rise on my cheeks when I saw the amused smirk grow on his lips.

"Yeah Jules, I know I look amazing. You're quite a looker yourself." He held out his hand towards me. "Come on lazy. I have a busy day ahead of me and I wanna start it the best way possible."

I stretched and stifled a big yawn, then grabbed his hand. He pulled me close and I squeaked when he unexpectedly swooped me up in his arms. My arms were around his neck immediately and I pulled his head towards mine to capture his lips. Only when I felt the warm water flowing over us did I realize that he had carried me to the bathroom.

"How do you do that Mike?" I asked him before crashing my lips against his again.

"Do what, Jules?" And before I could answer him, his mouth covered mine.

"This is a fun way to have a conversation," I grinned at him, pecked his lips and finished my question, "How do you make me forget about everything around me every time you touch me, kiss me or even just by looking at me?"

He slowly put me down on my feet, and cupped my face in his hands, brushing a wet strand of my hair out my face. "It must be some sort of superpower." He still smiled, but there was also a hint of sadness in his eyes, which didn't match his light tone. For a short moment his smile faded and he added, so soft that I could barely hear him, "But I'm not so sure that's such a good thing."

He didn't give me time to ask him what he meant, or even to think about it. His lips lowered on mine again, taking control of my mouth; his hands were everywhere, taking control of my body. I responded to his furious passion and let go of every inhibition. I felt like I was burning and his hands and mouth only incited the fire even more. It felt like a dream.

Last night had been amazing, but it didn't compare to this. Somehow, today there was more intensity in the way he kissed me, touched me, and made love to me, that was like nothing I had ever experienced. He brought me to heights that I had never dreamed of. It almost felt like he was trying to brand me with kisses, to mark me as his. One thing was certain... taking a shower would never be the same again.

We stood panting; my legs were around his waist, my back against the wall. His arms tightened around me and his face buried in the crook of my neck.

"I never, ever wanna move again," Mike whispered in my ear. "I would be perfectly happy if I could stay here with you for the rest of my life."

"Hmm… I like the sound of that," I replied, while wrapping my arms tighter around his neck and pulling him even closer. "But don't you think that you would get tired eventually?"

His lips traveled across my shoulder to give me a sweet kiss. "I'll never get tired of holding you Jules. I think that I'm… "

We both screamed as the water suddenly turned ice cold. We stumbled out of the shower and fell down on the floor laughing.

"I guess I need a new plan for the rest of my life," Mike grinned. "Somehow, spending it with you in a shower isn't fun when it turns cold... and although I would happily stay here, this floor doesn't seem to like me very much." He rubbed the back of his head. "It hit me." He pouted, making me giggle. With the smallest of smiles, he entangled himself from me, pushed himself off the floor and pulled me up next. Mike grabbed a towel and wrapped it around me, then started drying himself, meanwhile leaving the bathroom.

The moment Mike left my sight; I felt my happy mood evaporate. I thought about how everybody would react when they found out what had happened between Mike and me. Especially the reaction I envisioned from Cody... just the thought of it almost broke my heart. It would not only hurt him, but also ensure we would never be together. For one second the thought slipped through my head that he might get so jealous at Mike that he would finally fight for our relationship... but that chance was so slim, I couldn't risk even thinking about it. Not to mention that I didn't want to use Mike that way. I didn't know how he really felt about me and I felt ashamed that I had slept with him so easily. I also knew that if that was what Mike wanted, I would let it happen over and over again. He really blew my mind away. If it hadn't been for Cody, I would have happily tried to make things work with Mike.

"Mike?" I slumped into the room to get dressed. Mike was already fully clothed and he was tying his shoelaces. He looked up to meet my eyes, his happy smile darkening when he saw the look on my face.

"Yeah?"

I didn't answer straight away I rummaged through my suitcase to find some clean clothes, cringing at the thought of saying these words, as I knew he wasn't going to be happy. "Can we keep this between us for now?"

He was silent for a long time. His eyes burned holes into my back, but I was too much of a coward to look him in the eyes. I heard him stand up and approach me.

"Jules, look at me please?" For the first time _ever_, Mike sounded insecure.

I slowly turned around to face him. He stared down on me, his expression unreadable. "I don't understand what you want from me." He lifted his hands as if to touch me, but let them fall to his sides again.

"Err, I… you… I think…," I stammered. "I don't know!"

And I really didn't know, because as I saw the hurt and anger in the bright blue eyes of my best friend, I realized that Cody wasn't the only one who held my heart hostage. Most of it still belonged to Cody, but Mike had now captured a small piece for himself. I cursed the tears forming in my eyes. I was sick of being such a crybaby.

"I told you last night, Mike. I can't promise you anything."

"But do you want to do this again?" He took a step back and crossed his arms. "Or do you want to go back to just being friends?"

I couldn't stop my tears from falling freely now. This seemed to thaw him a little, because he brushed them away with his thumb. He closed his eyes and shook his head. When he opened his eyes again, the strange expression was gone and the openness and warmth that I loved about my friend were back.

"Don't cry Jules, there's really no need for tears. Don't you understand that I just need to know where I stand? Last night and this morning have been so fucking unbelievable." He stepped closer to me, and cupped my face in his hands. The expression in his eyes changed again, this time to naked desire. That look send shivers down my spine. "I really need to know if we're gonna do it again. If keeping it a secret is the price, than I will happily pay it."

"Mike," I sighed his name, a surge of relief flowed through my body at his words. I admit there was also a little part of me that was disappointed he was only talking about sex. My hands stroked his chest, then slipped around his neck. "Just because I don't want the whole world to know about it, doesn't mean I don't want it to happen again. It wasn't only amazing for you."

I pulled his head towards mine to show him just what I meant by my words. What was meant as one last kiss, at least for now, quickly became a highly passionate kiss and a moment later my back hit the mattress. His shirt was already out and I was fiddling with his belt when his eyes fell on the clock.

"Damn," He cursed. "You have no idea how much I want you right now... but I have to run. I have an interview in half an hour and absolutely no idea where I need to be for it." Despite his hurry, he took his time when he bent to kiss me again, before disentangling himself from me. Before he left, his eyes took in every inch of me. "Hmm… this is an image that I never want to forget. Have I told you already, how hot you look when you want me?" He blew me a kiss and winked. "Bye Jules, I'll see you tonight."

I stayed behind, confused and feeling uptight and really guilty. What the hell had I gotten myself into? And what was I gonna do about it? Stupid men, life would be so much easier without them.

But it would also be a lot less enjoyable. I could still feel the effects that Mike's hands had had on me.

I shook my head furiously. I needed to get my mind away from guys and focus on my job. Mike wasn't the only one who had places to be, I had a meeting and I was already very late. I smirked at the thought that popped into my brain... getting fired would be a great way to solve this situation. I rushed to get dressed. Looking in the mirror, I pulled a face. My hair was a mess and I had no time to fix it, no other solution than to pull it back into a ponytail. I stuck out my tongue to the mirror. I hated my hair like this. No time for make-up either, I just had to wait until later to be presentable. Now I just needed to run.

* * *

"Are you up to this, Julia?" a voice asked. I snapped out of my daydream and looked at the senior-writer, my boss, with a bewildered expression on my face. He shook his head, amused. "Have you heard anything we've discussed this morning? You seem to be a little bit distracted. I'm not used to that from you."

"I'm sorry, Sir. It won't happen again." My cheeks burned.

"So, are you up to it?" I had no idea what he was talking about, so I just nodded. I hoped I had not just agreed to do something horrible, like moving to Smackdown again. I would have to ask Sarah later. I cringed when I saw her worried expression. I had definitely not agreed to something good.

And I was right, it wasn't good... it wasn't good at all. I had just taken on the job of writing an outline and a first draft for Legacy's storyline from now on until Wrestlemania... 9 months later. I loved the idea, writing for heels had always been my preference and working with Randy would be a blast. I hadn't worked closely with him since I first started working for the WWE. The main problem was that there were two other men included in this storyline, one of them being Cody. One part of me loved this opportunity, I would be spending time with him, but I was also afraid that he would think I had volunteered for this, to force him to spend time with him. It would be terribly uncomfortable to be forced to be close to him, to travel with him when we were both trying to get over the other. Not to mention, I didn't think Mike would like this very much either.

* * *

Later that day, I was getting tired of myself. I was sick of worrying and pining and thinking in the same never-ending circles. I needed to have fun, I wanted to dance and drink and laugh and I needed to get away from men to do that. Who I did need was Sarah. I bounced into her room, which she shared with Evan now.

"Girls night out Sarah… no excuses and definitely no men allowed."

Sarah nodded, an enthusiastic grin spread on her face. "Good plan. It's been too long since it was just us, hasn't it? Anyway, you have to tell me what happened between you and Mike. We saw him sneaking out off your room this morning."

"No," I shook my head, my eyes wide. "I don't want to talk about men tonight. They're all useless," I grinned at Evan, who merely chuckled. Good thing he wasn't easily offended. "I just wanna have fun tonight. By the way, Mike is always sneaking out off my room."

"Not with that look on his face, he isn't," Evan replied, smirking slightly, eyebrows raised.

"What look?" I asked innocently. On the inside, I cursed.

"Never mind," Evan sighed. "I'll just ask Mike. I'm sure he will tell me everything."

"He won't," I said, a little too fast. "Cause there is nothing to tell," I added. I didn't miss the amused look Evan and Sarah exchanged. It was time for me to leave. My friend would torture it out of me soon enough, but not tonight. Tonight I was going to have fun.

Not too long after leaving with Sarah, she and I were doing just that in a bar just across from the arena. It was a great place, since none of the crew would come into a place that was this packed with fans. The bonus was that it was close to the hotel, so we could walk back later. The bar was amazing; it had great cocktails and lots of happy Aussies. I finally managed to forget about everything and felt like myself again. At least, for the first part of the night...

"What the hell..." I began, choking on my cocktail as my eyes found a bunch of people entering the bar, "...are they doing here?"

Sarah turned to look in the same direction as me, only to notice Ted, Randy and Cody walking through the crowds. What was the point in having a girl's night out, when the men you were trying to avoid somehow managed to follow you? To make matters even worse, Mike, Jack and Evan, among others, followed them in only seconds after.

"Dunno," She shrugged. "I didn't tell them where we went." I looked at her with disbelief in my eyes. "No really, I didn't. I'm not whipped enough yet that I can't even spend a night without Evan. Let's just ignore them."

"Girls only tonight, Mike," I said, when he came over to greet me. "Look," I pointed at Evan. "Not even Evan is allowed."

He shrugged, leant in to kiss me on the cheek and whispered, "Let me know when this girls only thing ends okay? I'd like to finish what we started this morning." I couldn't help smiling when he walked away. Everything about Mike was just so uncomplicated. I wish I could say the same about myself and a certain other guy.

Even though Mike's prospects had made me smile, and nobody else tried to bother me and Sarah, my good mood quickly disappeared. I tried to keep it up for Sarah, and even more for myself, but having Cody and Mike here at the same time didn't exactly allow me anything other than a mind full of stress. The fact that they were both were staring at me didn't help either. It only brought up all my doubts and worries again, and soon I was brooding silently over my drink. I had sent Sarah away and even the bartender had given up with flirting with me.

* * *

Cody

I cursed Randy that he had convinced me to go out tonight. I agreed with my friend that it would be a waste to spend the entire Australian trip pining in my room, but why did we have to pick the one bar Julia was in? I wish I could have drunk away my pain, but with Randy around, that surely wasn't an option. Even more, I wished I could just go and talk to her, but that was another thing that was no option. I wasn't worthy of her and I didn't want to hurt her ever again. So, I needed to stay away from her. Right now, she was unhappy, and it was all my fault. I had caught a quick glance from her before she noticed me coming in, and she had looked perfectly happy. Now she sat lonely at the bar, a sad look on her face. If I had needed anymore proof that I needed to leave, I had that now.

"Randy? Could you do me a favor?" Randy nodded. "Could you please check on Julia for me? I can't stand it when she's so unhappy."

Randy shot me a piercing look, "Then just go and talk to her yourself. We're not in high school anymore."

"You're an asshole, Orton. You know why I can't," I looked at him, but his expression didn't change, so I just shook my head, "Never mind. I'll ask Jack." I turned my back on him. So much for being a friend.

A strong hand grabbed me by the shoulder before I could walk away. "Stop, Cody. I'm sorry, I'd just rather stay out of this."

"I'm not asking you to play matchmaker, I'm asking you to cheer her up. If you won't do it for me, then do it for her," With those words, I walked away.

On my way back from the bathroom, some fans approached me. Normally I didn't let myself be dragged into conversation with fans, but tonight it gave me something else to think about. I still looked towards Julia once in a while, and I was glad to see that Randy had gone up to talk to her. I had hoped spending time with him would cheer her up, seeing as they were good friends... but the more time he spent talking to her, the more upset she looked.

* * *

Julia

"I just don't know what to do anymore Randy. I've made such a mess of everything." I looked at my friend, my eyes pleading with him to help solve my problems.

"It's not your fault, Julia. Cody played a big part in all of it. I even blame myself for some. If I hadn't been so hard on him back then, he might not have been so depressed right now." Randy rubbed his cheek, looking tired.

"No Randy," I shook my head. "It's my fault, I hurt him so bad. And I could've made things right on the plane. Jack gave me the perfect opportunity, and I blew it and now nothing is as it should be." Angrily, I wiped the tears from my eyes. "My head feels like it's gonna explode. Why fucking tell me that he loves me if he doesn't want to be with me?" A horrible thought popped into my head. "Do you think he's just trying to mess with my head?" I ripped a coaster into tiny pieces. "It just makes sense, you know."

Randy stared straight ahead for a moment, then shook his head. "No. Definitely not. I think he really loves you and that he really thinks that he's doing the best thing for you." Randy turned to face me again. "But it's not just Cody anymore. I've seen you with Mike the last few days and something has definitely changed between you two... and he hasn't taken his eyes of you tonight, either."

I couldn't prevent myself from smiling and then my cheeks burned hot when I saw the amused look in Randy's eyes. "Quit it Randy. I don't want to talk about him now."

He raised an eyebrow. "You do realize that Mike is a part of the mess in your head, don't you? Whether you've already slept with him…" I tried to force my expression to stay neutral. "Ok, so you have. It doesn't really matter. You need to make a choice. If it isn't for them, though I don't think Cody could get any worse and Mike can take care of himself, then it's for yourself."

"I know, I know." I groaned when I rested my head in my hands. "But it's not that easy. I just can't seem to get over Cody. I was trying to, and them he goes and tells me that he loves me."

"Cody is thinking about leaving. Did you know that?"

"What?!?" I started to shake my head, but then I saw the look in his eyes. He was deadly serious. "Please tell me it's not about me. He can't do that. I won't let him."

"Then please talk to him. Don't let him think he needs to leave, Julia. I don't care how you do it, but please try it, for him, for me?" I slowly nodded. I had so much to think about now.

I told Randy I was going back to the arena to walk the halls and think about things. Truly being alone might help me clear my mind. When Mike tried to follow me, I begged him to let me go alone. He might not have liked it, but he gave me the space I needed.


	10. Torn

**A/N: And here's the next... please enjoy and don't forget to tell me what you think about it. Feedback is highly appreciated. I would love to hear some thoughts about how what you guys want to happen. I have Legacychick's muses for the week, so I hope to get a lot written.**

**Chapter 10 Torn**

I might have decided I wanted to get into the arena to think, but I hadn't thought about how I would get in at this time of the night. But when I had set my mind to do something, I usually found I away to make sure I got just that. In this case a sweet smile to the security guard and a bullshit story about a lost cell phone got me in.

Strange enough I felt kind of good as I walked the empty corridors. I hadn't been truly alone for so long. For the moment I tried not to think about anything. I emptied my head and concentrated on the sound of my footsteps and breathed in the silence. I imagined all my tension and worries to stay behind with every step I took. The meditation class I had taken a long time ago finally paid itself off.

When my head was clear, I decided I wanted to find a place to sit and think things over. Now I was in this state of mind, I realized that I had to approach my current problems like in the same way I always solved a problem. I needed to look at this rationally and avoid being caught up in all the emotions again. Then I needed to make a decision and stick with it. As I had learned in my psychology classes, emotions are caused by thoughts and not the other way around. Though I doubted if this really went for love as well, trying it wouldn't hurt me.

My wanderings had brought me backstage and to the curtains onto the ramp. We would do another show here the next day, so everything was still here. I walked down the ramp and wondered for a moment what it would feel like to walk here with eighteen thousand people cheering you on. Or booing you of course, depending on who you were. I shook my head, it wouldn't be my kind of job. Being in the centre of the attention was one thing, but that much attention? I would just leave it at writing.

I climbed in the ring and went to sit in one of the corners. The lights went out, the stadium was dark now, but it didn't matter to me. Sitting here in the dark made this an even better place to think. Slowly I began to unravel all the little bits and pieces of the mess my life was right now. For once I didn't start thinking about Cody of Mike or anyone else. I started thinking about me: what did I want? I wanted to feel loved, I wanted to feel safe, I wanted to be with someone I could really talk to, someone who would understand me, and on top of it all I wanted to have fun. For the first time in my life I wanted to have a steady relationship. I was ready to think about the future. For a moment I let my mind slip to my career. I would stay with the WWE for at least one more year, after that I would rethink everything. I would love to work for a television studio. I smiled, there was one point for Mike; he already lived in LA. Right now both guys lived far away from me and for me moving was not an option. Not if I wanted to keep my job for a little longer.

Now my mind was already on Cody and Mike, I tried to picture them both in the life I wanted. This wasn't so easy. Sarah had been right, I barely knew Cody, so I had virtually no idea what life would bring with him. I couldn't even imagine what it would be like to spend a day with him. With Mike on the other hand, I could picture life all too well, and I must admit I really liked the idea of this. I knew Mike and I could make things work, we would be so good together. He was not only my best friend, but as last night had proven, we were very, very compatible in bed, too.

Mike was the perfect guy, except for one thing… he simply wasn't Cody. I felt desperation seep over me again. However painful it was and how much easier it would be if it wasn't true, right now Mike was my second choice. If Cody would tell me he wanted to be with me, I'd chose him in a heartbeat.

Right that moment, I decided to try one last time to talk to Cody. If that didn't work, if we couldn't take a step forward in, let's say, the next month, I would move on. If nothing else worked, I would quit and leave myself. I sighed, trying to decide what I was going to say to Cody when he would let me near enough to try and talk to him.

* * *

Cody:

After I had seen Julia leave the bar, I had hoped that I could pull myself together and have some fun with my friends at last. But as I leaned onto the wall and looked at the happy crowd, I felt oddly detached from everybody.

Randy sat brooding at the bar. He had barely moved since Julia had left. I was dying to find out what they had talked about, but the verbal ass-kicking Randy would certainly give me, prevented me from even approaching him. By the way, I didn't need to torture myself even more. And Randy didn't look like he had anything cheerful to say.

On the other side of the bar Jack was chatting up a very beautiful and not to mention a very young girl. She didn't look one day over 18, if she even was that old. I chuckled; some things would never change.

And over there was Ted was talking animatedly with Evan and Mike. How could he have fun with that idiot? How could anyone? I didn't understand how there could be people who liked him. But to be honest most of my friends did, even the girl I loved spend most of her time with him. They had been flirting lately and the last few days Mike couldn't take his eyes off her. Not that this was truly something out of the ordinary: Julia was so beautiful no man could keep himself from looking at her.

But I had seen how she looked at him now, how she moved and smiled when she was around Mike. A long time ago, that had been the way she had acted around me. Now there was only pain in her eyes as she looked at me and I knew for a fact that it would only be a matter of time before I would lose her to him. And the worst of it all was that I knew she would be happy with him. I had never seen her look unhappy when she was around him.

Suddenly I couldn't stand to be here anymore. It took only a fraction of a second for my decision to become final: I would quit the moment we got back to the States; going to Smackdown wasn't enough. I needed to be out of her life for good.

Half an hour later I was walking through the dark stadium. Tears were clouding my vision. It suddenly came to me how much I was going to miss this when I had quit. It had been my life, my dream since I was a little kid. But it wasn't enough to keep me here. The good things didn't make up for the torture seeing her caused me. Not for the first time this week, I realized I just didn't care anymore where I was or what I was doing. I was dead inside anyway.

I climbed into the ring; this being the only place my head was ever clear. I thought I saw someone sitting in the corner, but immediately knew I must be mistaken. No-one would come here in the dark. I was alone. Alone for now and alone for ever. I felt lost and small and tired and so, so weak. I knew what was right, I knew what I needed to do, but I didn't know if I really had the strength to go through with it. I didn't know if I could live without my heart. My knees buckled under me and I fell to the ground. Painful sobs ripped through my body.

* * *

Julia:

The sound of footsteps echoing through the huge arena caused my blood to turn into ice. I scolded myself for the stupidity of coming here all alone. I could have just gone to the hotel, but no, I needed to go and act all dramatic again. It might only be the security guard checking where I had gone to, but I didn't feel save at all at that thought as I recalled the face of that man. He was a big, bulky man, with sleazy, unreliable eyes; hungry eyes, I thought. The kind of man who would take a smile as an invitation to do anything he wanted. The kind of man who would tell I had asked for it after he had raped me. "Quit it Julia," I told myself off. There really was no need yet to start acting hysterical, at least not until I knew who it was. After all it could very well be Randy looking for me. I willed my breathing to slow down and my body to relax a little. I was so tense my muscles ached.

Still, for all my self-directed pep-talk, I was terrified when I heard the man enter the ring. I huddled in the corner in an attempt to become invisible. I wondered if I could slip out without him noticing or if I'd better make a run for it. Mentally I repeated the self-defense lessons that Randy had endlessly practiced with me. Adrenaline was running high, I only hadn't decided if I would fight of if I would run.

Now the man was getting closer, there was something familiar about the shape of his body, the sound of his footsteps, of his pained breathing. The second later I breathed easier… It was Cody.

He didn't appear to have noticed me sitting here. He seemed too lost in his own thoughts. I thought I could hear him crying. I didn't know if I should let him know that I was here, didn't know if I should interfere in his privacy. But this might be the best opportunity I would ever get to talk to him. For minutes I hesitated, deciding to speak up… then stopping myself, before I could even utter a word.

But when I heard the pain in his voice, I just stopped thinking.

* * *

Cody:

I startled when I felt her arms around me.

"Cody," she whispered. "Cody come here."

I could not do anything else than to pull her close to me. I just didn't want to be alone right now. I didn't have the strength to keep my distance, I couldn't and I didn't want to. I didn't care about anything else than her arms around me, her warm body pulled tightly against mine and I just cried, feeling safe for the first time in months.

I must have cried for more than ten minutes, sobbing into the crook of her neck. Her soft hands stroked my face and my back. She was muttering soothing nothings in my ear. After what felt like eternity the sobs that ripped though my body lessened and my tears dried. But even when my tears had gone, the need to hold her against me didn't go away. She felt so good in my arms, it all felt so right. But it wasn't right, nothing was right about this situation.

But when I tried to lessen my grip, she said, "Please don't let go of me, Cody. Please don't. It just hurts too much."

What else could I do than to hold her close and comfort her, now tears streaked her face. I didn't understand what caused her pain, but I would do everything to make her feel better.

"I'm so sorry I did this to you Cody. I shouldn't have said it, it was so mean of me. I never meant to hurt you like this."

"It doesn't matter Julia, I probably deserved it."

She pulled away from me, hugging her knees. My arms suddenly felt way too empty.

"But that's just the point, Cody. You didn't. You're right in thinking it would've been better when we'd never met. I ruined your life."

I wondered if I dared to touch her again. She seemed distant, looking at me from the corner of her eyes.

* * *

Julia:

I had no idea what to say next. He just didn't seem to understand what I was talking about and I had no idea how to explain it. And honestly I didn't really want to say it out loud. It would raise yet another wall between us. But I couldn't go on letting him feel this bad about himself. Not when I knew it wasn't true, not when I knew I had caused this. All I could hope for was that he could stand to be near me ever again. I didn't even dare to hope that he would still love me afterwards. But then at least he had a chance to be happy again.

"Do you know how it is?" He spoke careful now, as if he was thinking about every word before it came out of his mouth, "Not to know if you'll ever feel whole again? Not to know if you'll ever be happy again? Not to know if you're not better of dead?"

I inhaled sharply but kept quiet, waiting for him to continue.

"The last few months have been the worst of my life. It seems impossible that I could feel any lousier than I do now. Still when I think of a world in which I never met you…"

He shook his head, seemingly lost for words. "You didn't ruin my life, I did that myself. I tried to hit you remember?"

I felt so horrible guilty right now, somehow I had to mend the damage I had caused.

"But Cody," I spoke really soft, careful not to spook him. I could feel his tension even though he wasn't touching me. He could make a run for it every moment now. "You didn't hit me, I don't think you would have. You don't have that in you. I know that."

My voice trembled with emotion. "Cody, you were drunk, you were angry, you weren't yourself that night. There's a difference between the intention to do something and actually doing it."

* * *

Cody

I looked at her lost for words. "But, what you said about alcohol just lessening your inhibitions? Isn't that true?"

She looked down, the pain on her face was almost unbearable. Tears dripped from her eyes. As I tried to wrap my arm around her, she shied away from me and continued her explanation, meanwhile still staring at the floor.

"I was so angry at you Cody. I liked you so much and then you just looked at those other girls and you forgot all about me. You acted like there was nothing between us, like I was nothing more than one of your usual conquests. It hurt Cody, it hurt so much…"

I cringed at those words. I could've had her, she could've been mine if I hadn't acted as such an idiot. Of course I would have hurt her sooner of later anyway, I wasn't good enough for her. I was so lost in these thoughts that I nearly missed the next thing she said, spoken in a soft, choked up tone.

"So I wanted to hurt you, like you hurt me. What I told you, it's not exactly true."

I was bewildered and tried to wrap my mind about what she meant. "Go on."

She sighed. "It's kind of complicated. Those inhibitions I talked about are about the only thing that makes us civilized. So when you're drunk, with your inhibitions gone, you just do things you'd normally never do. Like peeing against someones front door or stripping in public. Or trying to hit someone."

She cried again, but I wasn't so sure I wanted to comfort her right now.

"I'd never had said it, if I had knew how it would affect you. I'm so sorry, I should've talked to you earlier, but I didn't know what was bothering you. No-one did. I only figured it out after we talked in the plane."

I slowly stood up, I wasn't listening to her anymore. I was getting really angry and I needed to get away from her fast.

"Cody, I know you're angry at me and you should be, but please listen to me."

I stopped and slowly turned my head towards her. Julia stood up too and reached out to touch my hand, but thought better of that when she saw the expression in my eyes. I tried to relax myself, so I wouldn't lose my temper.

"Randy told me you're thinking about quitting. Please don't. I'll go if you can't be near me again. Say the word, and I'm gone. I will, I swear."

I turned around and started to walk off, but she grabbed me by the arm.

"I'm so sorry Cody. I never meant to hurt you like this. Cody please talk to me? Cody…? Cody…? Please, talk to me, please, I'm so sorry, please don't go…"

Too angry to understand the words she screamed at me, I just pulled my arm away and I walked out of the arena.


	11. Love Hurts

**A/N This one is pretty short, so I'll get the next one up pretty soon, I think it's gonna be monday. **

**The last few weeks I've been to lazy to thank all of you who are so kind to review, so thank you:**

**.Eden, undermyumbrella, LegacyChick, lknights91, miamitravel, Chain Gang Princess, GreyLionDiva, VolcomStoneBabe and Kristl for reviewing the last few chapters. I also want to thank everyone who has put this one on story alert and for everyone who has even put it on his favorite story list: I love you guys.**

**So enjoy and please review :)**

**Chapter 11: Love hurts**

Julia

Randy found me still crying in the ring. I must have been there for more than an hour. I was shivering, I was so tired, I couldn't even stand on my legs anymore. He lifted me in his arms and carried me back to the hotel. Even in his arms, I couldn't stop crying. I only sobbed harder.

"He hates me now Randy. I think he really hates me." I kept repeating these words over and over in between my sobs.

He shushed me, pulling me even closer to his chest. "I'm here for you. I always will be. Tell me what happened."

So I did. It took me a long time to make him understand, since I burst into tears a few times halfway through the tale. Randy was quiet for quite a while after I had finished.

"Thank you Julia, for doing this for him. You did the right thing. No one else could have done this. Now he needs to heal. Give him the space to do that."

His lips grazed my forehead. "You need to sleep now. We'll think about how to fix you two later. I promise you that."

I clung to Randy. I pushed my face into his chest and let my tears soak his shirt. When we reached my hotel room, he slowly set me on my feet and asked me for the key. I nearly fell down, my legs felt like jelly. Randy put his arm around my waist to keep me up. I felt panicky. I had no idea where my key was, or my phone, or my bag. I was starting to hyperventilate and I looked up at Randy with wide eyes, tears streaming down my face.

"Jules?" a strained voice asked. I slowly turned to the direction of the sound. Mike pushed himself to his feet; he had been sitting next to my door. "I was so worried Jules, I couldn't reach you. You left your bag in the bar."

He held out my bag towards me. I just stared at it, at him; I didn't know what to do. Randy took the bag from him and started to look for my key.

"What happened to you Jules? Did someone hurt you? I knew I shouldn't have let you leave on your own." Mike started towards me, but I just buried my face into Randy's shirt. I couldn't deal with Mike right now.

"Go away Mike. Can't you see she can't take anything more right now?" Randy sounded harsh. He opened the door and pushed me in. He told me to get ready for bed. When he turned around to leave the room, I clung myself to him.

"Please don't leave Randy, please don't leave me alone." I started to cry all over again.

"I'll be right back, hun. You need to get yourself into bed; I just need to talk to Mike for a minute, ok?"

He pulled back to look into my eyes and wiped the tears from my face with his thumb. I watched as Randy walked out of my room and then I slowly started to obey him. Automatically I went through all the usual tasks of getting ready for bed. I didn't allow myself to think about anything for a moment, I was afraid that I would break down again and collapse on the bathroom floor. All I wanted was my bed. As I was finally crawling in under my covers, I tried to ignore the angry voices of my two friends - my two protectors - as they were arguing down the hallway.

* * *

Mike

"If she's hurt, she needs me. What happened to her Randy?" I usually liked Randy, but right now I felt like ripping his throat out because he was standing between me and my Jules. "It's Cody again, isn't it? I'll kill him, I swear! Why can't he leave her alone?" I glared at Randy, my hands clenched into fists.

"Mike, can't you see how much she loves him? They need a chance to work things out. As long as things between them are like this, neither of them stand a chance of moving on." His glare matched mine. "You need to give her space. And Mike… If you ever, ever hurt her…"

I didn't let him finished his sentence. "If you can't stand her getting hurt, then you should do something about Cody. He is the one who's always hurting her…" I took a step closer to him until our noses were only inches apart. I didn't need much to lose it now. "And Orton, I warn you, you don't want to push me like this. I'm not one of your students. You can't tell me what to do. She means a hell of a lot to me too, remember."

"You gotta stay out of this Mike. You have no idea what's going on between them. You might not believe me, but you better keep your distance, otherwise the pair of you are going to get hurt." Randy's voice was soothing now, but it only pissed me off even more.

"I can take care of myself and I'm very capable of looking after Julia. I would never hurt her." I hissed these words at him. "So get out of my way and let me check on her." I tried to slip past him.

"No! Fuck off, Mike. I'm not asking you this again." He moved so he was blocking the door again. "She told _me_ where she was tonight, she asked _me_ to stay with her. If she'd wanted you, she'd have asked you." A smirk crept up his lips. "I hope you remember that I'm married Mike? You seem to be a little jealous."

That comment startled me, because it was so true. Despite everything, I smiled. I took a step back and my anger evaporated. "She's really something, isn't she?" I shook my head. "Just let her know I'll come if she needs me ok?"

As I started to walk away, Randy grabbed me by the arm. "Mike, it's really better like this. Believe me; you don't want to hold her when she's crying over another guy." I only nodded.

I sighed as I finally left and walked towards my own room. I had my hands in my pockets and I tried to make sense of the mess in my head. Jealous over her friendship with Randy, what an idiot I was. Randy was right, although I wanted to be the one she came to when she needed help, I didn't want to comfort her about _him_. The thought hit me that I wasn't only jealous of Randy, I was jealous that Cody had the power to make her feel this bad. I wanted to be the one that could break her heart, although I would never do that, of course. With me, her heart would always be safe.

I felt so stupid for believing she was over Cody. I should have expected this. She had even told me herself how she still felt about him. Still, I couldn't wrap my head around it. After what we shared together, I couldn't believe she still had such strong feelings for another man. There had been no doubts, no holding back, no clue's at all. In one night, she had made me forget about everything I had promised myself. It would be almost impossible to keep the distance I had intended. Going back to being friends would be the wisest thing to do... but then I remembered how perfect it had felt to have her in my arms and I knew I wouldn't be able to turn away from her. I was already lost.

Still muttering and cursing to myself, I entered my room and got into bed, alone. Who would've known that Jack had been right the whole time? I could very well imagine his smug comments when he found out how I felt about Julia. 'I told you so,' would be the very least of it.

* * *

Cody

I must have walked for miles already. I couldn't believe what had happened tonight. I was so mad at her. All this frustration had to come out, so I broke into a wild run. How could she have done that to me? How could she have hurt me like that? How could she have purposefully done that?

I could still hear it echoing in my ears. _'So I wanted to hurt you… So I wanted to hurt you… So I wanted to hurt you…'_

The words became the rhythm of my steps. When I was finally too exhausted to continue, I willed my steps to slow and came to a halt. I had no idea where I was right now, but I didn't really care. I noticed I was getting stares from the few people still awake at this hour. This didn't bother me in the least. I glared at them and they went back to their own business.

I took a turn when I saw the sign pointing to the beach. I took up running again; I wanted to be really alone as soon as possible. And the run felt good, it almost cleared my mind. Almost.

It was so ironic, a few hours ago I'd wanted nothing more than to not be alone and now I just wanted some peace and quiet to think about what had just happened.

I sat down in the sand a few minutes later. I listened to the sound of the waves, feeling myself relax for the first time in months. A weight had been lifted off my shoulders. The black hole was gone. I was angry now, but it was a healthy kind of anger. I wasn't the guy who hit women. I didn't need to be alone my whole life. I was merely the guy who had to try not to drink too much, but I'd always known that and I hadn't had a drink in months now. I didn't even miss it.

I was furious at myself that I had believed her, and so angry at her that she had that kind of power over me. This girl was not good for me. I felt my heart breaking again. She had caused me so much pain; I had nearly let her destroy me.

But I still loved her. I loved her like hell.


	12. Pick me, choose me, love me

**A/N oops almost forgot I promised an update today. I'm really happy with the wrestlemania outcome. So much better than the Rumble or Elimination Chamber. No need for tears today :)**

**We're back to Julia and Mike for the next two chapters, after that we'll see Cody again. I wanna thank Legacychick for lending me her Muses. The next few chapters wouldn't be written without her Mike-muze. I love him, I really do. he has such interesting ideas :)**

**Thanks you .Eden and Legacychick for the review and thanks to everyone who put it on fav of story alert after the last one.**

**The song in here is Never Surrender by Skillet. I love that band, and this song. Their lyrics are amazing.**

**Chapter 12 - ****World Of Hurt**

It took me hours to fall asleep. Randy stayed with me the entire time. When he came back from his argument with Mike, I was huddled deep under the covers, my face buried in my pillow. Randy wouldn't tell me what Mike and he had talked about. He just told me that Mike was worried about me and that I only needed to say the word to make him come to me. This only made me cry harder. I felt so guilty towards Mike; he was such an amazing guy. I could never be selfless enough to comfort Mike if he was crying over another girl. But maybe this just meant that he didn't have feelings for me? That for him it was only friends with benefits, after all.

Finally, exhausted from all my worries and tears, I fell asleep. I didn't sleep well; I had terrible nightmares. I dreamt about Cody, that he left me forever… and about Mike, who, when I reached for him to help me, laughed at me and left with another girl. I dreamt about chasing first Cody, then Mike through the empty arena, but it quickly turned around, so that suddenly I was the one being chased, this time by the security guard from the arena, who only got bigger and scarier as my dream continued.

When I finally woke from this last dream, I was still exhausted, but too scared to even try to sleep anymore. I was alone. Randy must have left me some time after I had fallen asleep. I didn't blame him. I couldn't expect him to stay the entire night. He was married after all.

For the next hour or so, I just stared at the ceiling. I didn't want to move, I never wanted to leave my bed ever again. The mess I had made of my life was so unbelievable; I would have laughed in your face, if you'd told me a year ago that all of this would happen.

I must have fallen asleep again, because I was awoken by the sound of my phone. Since I couldn't reach it from where I was, I just ignored it. I didn't want to talk to anyone anyway. The phone kept going. I put my head under the pillow and tried to drown out the sound. It didn't work. Why did I have such an annoying ringtone?

I really needed to use the bathroom now, so I decided to answer the phone afterwards. Luckily it had stopped by then. I picked it up anyway, wanting to listen to some music. I noticed I had more than one missed call, a few from both Jack and Randy. I didn't want to speak to anyone now, so I turned my phone on flight mode.

Nobody could reach me now. I felt guilty for a second, then I just shrugged. There's not a lot that could happen to me in a hotel room. I wasn't going to come out today. Tomorrow I had to, seeing as we were leaving, but not today. If they'd fire me for missing the show, so what? I honestly didn't care; I had other things on my mind.

I finally found the song I really wanted to hear. I started to cry again when I listened to the words...

"_Do you know what it's like when  
You're not who you wanna be?  
Do you know what it's like to  
Be your own worst enemy  
Who sees the things in me I can't hide?_

_Do you know what it's like  
To wanna surrender?_

_I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow  
I don't wanna live like this today  
Make me feel better, I wanna feel better  
Stay with me here now and never surrender  
Never surrender…"_

I had put the song on repeat, not for the first time thinking how amazing it was that somehow, someone had managed to put all my feelings in to a song. I always felt less alone when I listened to the few bands that could do that for me.

"Julia?"

The first few times I thought I heard my name; I just ignored it, thinking I was going crazy. And anyway, I wanted to be alone. But the increasingly loud knocks on my door finally became too much to ignore and I turned the music off.

"Jules? Are you awake?"

"Go away," I shouted. "I wanna be alone." The knocking still didn't stop. "Piss off, Mike. I really wanna to be alone." I could hear him leaving and started to cry again, I felt so guilty about hurting his feelings. A few minutes later I heard more footsteps and I could hear him lean against my door.

"Don't shut me out Jules," He said. "Please don't think you need to push me away." I cringed at the sadness in his voice. This was so mean of him. I couldn't bear to see him sad; it just wasn't natural. "I won't leave until you let me in Jules. You know I won't, so just open the door."

I hesitated for a few more minutes. In the end I couldn't resist it anymore. I wanted nothing more than Mike to be with me now. The nightmares about Mike had been almost as disturbing as the nightmares about Cody.

Very slowly, I stood up and I walked to the door. I opened it up and stared into the concerned eyes of my best friend. His eyes were red. I wondered if he had been crying too, or if he was merely tired. Mike pulled me against him into a bear-hug. His arms pinned me against his body. I leant my head against his chest.

"Never do this to me again, Jules. Never send me away again," he whispered in my ear. "I don't care what's wrong with you, I don't care who breaks your heart, I'll always, _always_, be there for you. Whatever you want from me, whatever you need from me… it's yours, I swear." His voice was urgent and strained. He almost sounded like he was in pain.

"Mike…," I started to cry again.

"Shush Jules… you don't have to say anything if you don't want to. I'm here to cheer you up, not to make you feel even worse." He slowly released me from his tight grip and smiled, his eyes never leaving mine. "So, do you want to go and do something, or do you want to hang out here?"

I smiled through my tears. "I'm not exactly dressed to go out, don't you think?"

I was still in my pajamas; my hair was probably a crazy mess; my make-up must have been smeared all across my face. I hadn't had the courage to look in a mirror yet, but I knew I must have looked like hell. With any other man, I would have been really uncomfortable looking like this, but when I was with Mike, I always felt at ease. I was glad that this was one part of our relationship that hadn't changed.

"You look good enough for me, gorgeous," A charming smile played around his lips. "And anyway, I see nothing a shower can't fix."

When I heard him mention the shower, I felt a pull in my stomach. My eyes grew big and an involuntary smile crept on my lips. A second later, I felt bad for thinking about this now, when only a few minutes ago I had been heartbroken over Cody. Mike, however, didn't give me the chance to sink back into my depressed mood, as he reacted to the thoughts that he must have seen in my eyes.

"Don't worry, Jules," He said, rolling his eyes. "I wasn't thinking about _that_. You have to try a lot harder to get me into bed again. I'm not _easy_, you know."

"Ha ha… aren't you the funny one," I smirked at him. "I bet you can't remember how many times you've slept with a girl that you'd only just met. I know _I_ can't count them."

"That's so not the point. Has anyone ever told you how mean you are?" He pouted at me. "And now you go and take a shower. I'll order something to eat. I'm starving."

Mike pushed me towards the bathroom and just as I thought he had gone back to acting as just my friend, he smacked me on my butt. The expression in his eyes when I looked back at him over my shoulder was nothing less than devious. For one moment I thought about dragging him with me into the shower. He wouldn't resist me, I was sure about that. If I had understood him correctly, he had just told me that I needed to take the initiative if I wanted more of him.

As the warm water relaxed my tense muscles, I tried to guide my thoughts along safe roads. Finding a safe topic to think about wasn't so easy. The moment Mike wasn't near me, my mind tended to slip back to Cody, but I really didn't want to fall apart again. I had shed enough tears for him. I needed to try and accept that we would never be together. But as much as I wanted to go on with my life, I wasn't quite ready to give up on Cody yet.

Thinking about Mike wasn't the easy escape I had hoped it was. It got my mind off Cody for sure, but it also brought my mind back to what had happened in this exact shower less than 24 hours ago. That thought made my legs turn to jelly. No, those thoughts weren't safe at all, but they were very, very pleasant. Again, I realized that it had taken Mike only a few minutes to get me to snap out of my depressed mood, and to make me feel alive again.

A few minutes later, I was going back into my room, comfortably dressed in sweats and a tank top. I wanted to hang out there for now and maybe go out into town a little later. That was, if Mike managed to cheer me up a little more. The subject of my thoughts was sprawled out on my bed, shoveling pancakes in his mouth and chuckling at the television.

"You big, greedy pig, that's my breakfast you're eating. When did I offer to buy you some, anyway?"

"Relax Jules," He sent me a lazy smile. "I ordered some for you, too. And to make up for this, I'll buy you dinner sometime soon. If you're a good girl I might even take you somewhere nice."

"I'll have to think about that… I'm not so sure that I want to be seen in public with you," I said, teasing him, before I ordered him. "Now give me some of those pancakes. They smell good."

When we had wolfed down the crazy breakfast he had ordered, we made ourselves comfortable on the bed. At first we sat next to each other, a little distance between us. It made me nervous. I wanted to snuggle up against him to feel safe and sheltered again, but on the other hand, I didn't want to make things between us even more blurry. I shifted restlessly, unable to find a comfortable position to sit in. It was as if he took this as a sign, because he soon wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close, meanwhile sliding down in a half-lying, half-sitting position. I rested my head on his shoulder and a moment later I put my arm across his stomach. It was too pleasant to resist.

He was flipping channels fast. I stared lazily at the television; I didn't really focus on the screen, and tried to stay in this blissful mood. When he finally found something interesting, a rerun episode of Grey's Anatomy, I let myself be pulled into the tale quickly. It was one of my favorite episodes, with one of the most memorable scenes when Meredith begs Derek to choose her over his wife. I said the words 'so pick me, choose me, love me' along with her.

Mike tightened his arms around me at this scene and he buried his face in my hair. I looked up at him to see what was wrong. He had a dreamy and somewhat sad expression on his face. The usual smile was gone and there was something in his eyes that I couldn't quite grasp.

"What are you thinking Mike?"

"You don't want to know what I'm thinking, believe me Jules, you don't," His voice was serious, but a slight smile played around his lips now_._

I couldn't resist teasing him a little. _"_Ah… are you thinking dirty things about me again, Mikey?"

He chuckled, "I am now, thanks for reminding me." The way he checked me out made me blush. His grin became even wider. "I can tell you what I'm thinking now, if you still want to know."

I shifted so I was lying partly on top of him. His hands slipped around my waist immediately and with his thumbs he stroked the few inches of exposed skin on my back just above my waistband.

"Please tell me Mike, I'm curious about what you're thinking now." My hands messed with his hair; we were staring into each other's eyes. The tension between us was building fast.

"You make it very hard to think when you're acting like this, gorgeous." He pushed my top up a little and now his entire hands could reach my bare skin. His hands were hot against my cold skin. His soft touch gave me shivers. "I'm thinking about everything I want to do with you, about everything I want you to do with me…" He pushed my top up a little more. "And I'm thinking about what you've already done to me, and I wonder if it will be even better the next time," his voice was husky now. "And most of all I'm wondering when the next time will be," the last part was almost a groan. My fingers tightened in his hair when I heard his words.

Desire raced hot in my veins and I could see my feelings mirrored in his eyes. I desperately wanted to be kissed by him. I had to admire his self-control. I could feel how much he wanted me and still he waited for me to take the next step. I thought about teasing him some more, to force him to take the initiative, I lent closer with the plan to only kiss his cheek, but as my lips neared his, I couldn't resist the temptation. Heat flowed through my body the moment our lips met. His lips melted against mine, his tongue begged for entrance and I slightly parted my lips to let him in. He let one hand slip under my top and pulled me further on top of him. His other hand slipped into my sweats and started to massage my butt. I moaned into the kiss. His erection pushed against me and I moved my hips against him. A loud groan was my reward. Both hands were tugging on my top now. I sat up a little to allow him to take it off, still not breaking the kiss...

"Julia!" Someone shouted, accompanied with loud knocking. I cursed Jack for his timing.

"Ignore him Jules." Mike pulled me back into the kiss. His arms tightened around me and he made it impossible to get away from him. Honestly, I didn't want to. I wanted Jack to piss off and leave me and Mike to get on with what we were doing, his hands felt so good.

"Julia!" His voice was really urgent now. "Do you know where Cody is?"

This got my attention. I broke the kiss and pushed Mike away. He sighed. He must have understood it was useless to try to hold me now. I smiled apologetically, pulled down my top and hurried to the door.

"Julia? Why didn't you answer your phone? I tried to call you a million times."

I didn't even hear his question. "What do you mean by 'Do you know where Cody is'?"

"He isn't at the hotel, hasn't been there all night. Randy bribed the maid into letting him check Cody's room." Nervously he raked his hand through his hair. "We hoped he was with you."

I shook my head. "I haven't seen him since he ran out on me last night." I bit my lip. What if something happened to him? He was so mad yesterday. Have you tried calling him?"

He nodded. "I got about as much luck as I did trying to call you. That's why we hoped he came to see you."

"I've gotta try and find him." I was getting myself into a panic. Jack grabbed my arm and dragged me back into my room.

"That's no use. A lot of the guys are already looking for him. I'll call Randy, let him know that you're still alive and don't know where Cody is." His eyes widened when he saw Mike, who was at my side in two steps and pulled me against him.

"Jules, you need to calm down ok?" I was hyperventilating now.

"Something bad happened to him, I know it, I know it." My breath came out in ragged sobs.

Mike cupped my face in his hands and he looked into my eyes. "Just try to breathe slowly Jules…they'll find him soon. Everything will be alright, I promise… please calm down now, Jules. Come on gorgeous… you can do it, you're stronger than this, I know that." He tenderly stroked my tears away. After what felt like hours I could breath again. His eyes were the only thing that kept me sane. I was still shaking and crying. He pulled me into a hug and over my head he spoke to Jack.

"Why did you spring it on her like this?"

"Sorry man, I'm just really worried…"

Mike interrupted him abruptly, "Shut up, I won't have you upsetting her again. We'll talk outside ok?"

"Jules," he pulled back to look into my eyes again. "I have to talk to Jack about this. Will you be alright for a minute? I'll be right back, ok?"

I nodded. I still felt shaken, but my panic was bearable now. I knew I should've felt insulted that Mike didn't want me to hear what Jack had to say, but I only felt sheltered.


	13. Used

**A/N: Another update for my loyal readers. I love you guys! Thank you LegacyChick (for the review and for lending your Miz-muse to me, this chapter, like the last and the next wouldn't been here without him) and miamitravel, .Eden, lknights91 for the reviews. i also greatly appreciate the favs and story alerts. **

**By the way I really think that Mike is like this. Call it wishful thinking, but I love that guy. I always thought I was too old to have a crush on a guy I don't even know... boy was I wrong, hahaha. **

**Enjoy and don't forget to leave a review. **

**This one is entirely in Mike's POV**

**Chapter 13 Used**

I stalked out the room, expecting Jack to follow me. In the doorway I halted and looked back. Jack gave Julia a quick hug and whispered something in her ear. She smiled when he walked away, so at least he must have said something to cheer her up. That was good, because it wouldn't take much to make me lose it. Talk about bad timing… the interruption by itself was annoying enough. But having to witness what his message had done to Julia… it put things into perspective and put me back into my place, which was far behind Cody. I needed to remember this; I was playing with fire, but oh my god… she would be so worth getting a few burns.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked Jack.

"What do you know already?"

"Practically nothing. I know that she was heartbroken yesterday and that it had something to do with Cody. She was still a mess this morning. She didn't really want to talk, so I didn't push. I just cheered her up."

"Julia and Cody ran into each other yesterday night. They talked, I don't know exactly what happened, Randy wouldn't tell me, but something she said made Cody mad as hell and he ran out on her. Nobody has seen him since and everybody is worried as hell. He hasn't been exactly stable over the last few months and I'm afraid something bad has happened."

"If you say something like that to Julia, I'll kill you. She doesn't need to worry even more. Did you guys call the police?"

"No," he shook his head, "Just think about it. He's a grown man and he's only been gone for a couple of hours. They'll laugh in our faces." He looked at me closely. "What exactly did you do to cheer her up? I've never seen you acting like this. And both of you look a little, err… flushed…"

"Let's just say I would've appreciated it if you would've come an hour or so later." I couldn't help grinning.

"Mike," he chuckled, "I don't know if I should congratulate you or tell you that you're an idiot. That girl is trouble, you know that."

I nodded, "But well worth the trouble, believe me. If I could only make her forget about Cody…"

"Judging by her reaction when I told her about him, you're not doing such a good job. I still think you should be careful. She might not do it on purpose, but she will hurt you and break you into pieces. You only need to think about what she did to Cody."

"Just shut up and stay out of this," I was getting angry now, accepting that Jack could be right was not an option. "I can look after myself, I'm nothing like Cody." I glared at him. "And don't forget most of this mess is your fault."

"Err… what the fuck? What did I do?" He looked bewildered.

I sighed, Jack could be so thick. That was one of the qualities that usually made it fun to hang out with him. At other times, it was only annoying as hell. "If you wouldn't have put them together in the first place, none of this would have happened. She was finally getting over him. But no, you needed to act like a naive, happily ever-after fairy godmother and now things are an even bigger mess. I can't believe that a guy, who has never even managed a steady relationship himself, can still think things can be that simple."

Jack pulled a face. "Oh yeah, that… I can see why you see it like that." He smiled apologetically. "I was only trying to help, you know. They really love each other, so I just thought..."

"You just thought that putting them together would solve everything. Have you even considered, that the mess they are both in now means that they aren't even right for each other? I mean, it's not like they even had a long relationship, they're like this after sleeping together only _once_. Did you ever consider that they will be a disaster together?"

"You're just jealous, Mike." I wish I could have wiped the amused smile off his face.

"I am _not_ jealous… okay, maybe I am, but that's not the point." I rubbed my face. "Never mind, just think about it, ok? I need to get back to Julia now. I don't want her to be alone too long. Are you coming too?"

He shook his head. "I need to get back to Randy and Ted. I'll leave you to go back to what you were doing." A big grin appeared on his face.

"Yeah right… fat chance," I pulled a face at the thought. "Call me, not her, if you hear anything."

* * *

Before I entered the room again, I leant up against the door post and looked at her. Julia was lying on the bed, huddled up into a little ball. She was shaking, and although I couldn't see her face, I was sure she was crying again. Crying again over Cody. I hated him, I hated him with every inch of passion I had in me.

"Pick me… choose me… love me." I whispered. I closed my eyes for a second to get rid of the tears that clouded my vision, before I walked to the bed and laid down next to her. I pulled her in my arms and let my head rest on top of hers. She crawled against me and started to sob even harder.

"What if something's happened to him? It's my fault, everything is my fault… I messed everything up. Something bad has happened, I know it…" She was working herself up into a panic again.

"Shush Jules, don't worry. I'm sure he'll turn up tonight for the show. He gets to beat me up, don't you remember? He'll never miss _that_… he loves to beat the shit out of me. He'll be alright, I really think so. He's probably only taking a walk, to think about things."

No matter how much I hated Cody, I really hoped he was ok. Julia would never forgive herself if something had happened to him. I also agreed with Jack, anyone could see the guy was depressed and not exactly stable. What if he would have killed himself or gotten in an accident? I sighed. Great, now I was getting worried myself. I grunted, frustrated with myself.

Julia turned around in my arms. I cringed at how vulnerable she looked, with tears still dripping from her eyes. Her lips were trembling, she was as pale as a ghost and the pain in her eyes was unbearable. All I wanted was to make her feel better, to make her smile again. And I just didn't know how.

She moved her lips, like she was trying to say something. Her hands reached up to my face. One hand slipped around my neck, the other one stroked my cheek. I closed my eyes involuntary. Her soft touch felt so good, but what was she thinking? What did she want? She couldn't… and then her soft and warm lips touched mine. She tasted salty from her tears, and I knew that this was so wrong. I shouldn't let her use me like this, but I wanted her so bad. As I was trying to reach a decision, I let myself be pulled deeper into the kiss. She seemed so desperate, so urgent. My head was spinning. I moaned when her hands slipped under my t-shirt. I needed to stop her, before there would be no turning back. I slowly pushed her away. She resisted for a second, than became limp like a puppet. I looked at her face, so beautiful, so sad and so, so desirable, with her lips swollen from our kiss.

"No Jules, not now. Not like this."

"Mike, please? Make me feel better Mike, make me feel good again." She begged me, tears again dripping from her eyes. I could do nothing more than kiss her tears away. I wanted her so bad. But I wanted her to want me too; I needed her to want me for more than for making her forget about Cody.

"Please Mike?" As if she read in my eyes that my resolve was weakening, she sat up to take her top off.

I cursed myself and her and then myself again. But I stopped her. "Don't Jules. Please don't use me like this."

Still, she didn't let me be and pressed her lips against mine again. I couldn't stop myself from kissing her back. I rolled her on her back and I let my hands slip under her top. I caressed her stomach and her breasts, and I smiled when I heard her moan. I could make her forget, I could make her forget about anything but me. I could rip her clothes off and make her scream my name. I wanted that, even if that would be all I got from her. But when I broke the kiss to take her top off, and I looked in her eyes, I noticed she was still crying. There was desire in her eyes, but even more than that, I saw pain and I wasn't prepared to be merely a painkiller. Not when I wasn't the one who caused her this pain. So, I pulled away and stood up from the bed. I needed to put some space between us.

"I'm sorry Jules, I can't do this." I reached to pick up my phone. I would call Sarah to come for her and then I would leave. I needed to be alone to think.

"Don't you want me, Mike?" She asked. She sat up on the bed, a confused expression on her face.

I groaned, frustrated. "It's not that I don't want you, Jules. Believe me, I do. I want you more than you think, more than you can know. The problem is that I think that you don't really want me."

She glared at me. I didn't understand what I had done to make her angry. "You didn't seem to mind about that before."

"What?" Did she really say what I thought she said? I wanted to leave; she couldn't be serious, or was she? She had told me she needed me to blow her mind away. Was that all? Had everything only been about Cody? '_She will hurt you and break you into pieces'_, Jack had said. I didn't like when Jack was right about things, I didn't like it at all. I couldn't turn away, I could only stare at her in disbelief.

She stared back, and after a few moments I could see her expression change into horror. Tears dripped from her eyes again. She stood up from the bed and started to walk towards me, then halted, seemingly insecure as she sat back down on the bed. She hung her head. "I'm so sorry Mike, I didn't mean that. I'm a horrible person. I just keep driving people away from me. And I need you Mike; don't ever think that isn't true."

Her words made me feel a little better. But I still didn't know what to think. It might be better if I just stayed away from her for a while.

"I'll call Sarah. I don't want you to be alone today." I turned around so I didn't see the hurt in her eyes. I dialed the number and I quickly explained things to Sarah. She would come right away. In the meantime, I texted Jack and told him that he needed to contact Sarah if they found Cody. Just before I left, I turned around to face Julia. The pain on her face made me hesitate. But there was no way that I'd forgive her quite this fast. If she had pulled a stunt like this on Cody, I understood why the guy was so upset.

"Sarah will be here soon. I just need to be alone to think about things." And with those words I walked away, not waiting to see if she would reply.


	14. Healing

**A/N Too lazy to write a real note. We're back with Cody in this one. **

**Read and Review please. I love reviews, they make me happy, because that means someone is actually reading (and even better) liking this. ****Oh and don't be afraid to tell me if you don't like something, I'm still learning.**

**I've noticed that most reviews on here are something like "great story" and "I loved it update soon" and I noticed it makes me afraid to review something I don't particular like or to leave less than superpositive feedback. I think everyone on here writes themselves or likes to read and we can give each other valuable advice. ****Now I'm already talking, I also want to say that I hate the people who resort to the "if you don't review, I won't update-strategy" I hate to be told what to do, so anyone who says that, probably won't get a review. **

**Err... wait... somewhere in all this ramble, I really wanted to make a point... but what was it? :) It's like this when I start talking (or writing) I just don't shut up anymore. **

**Ah, here's the point: Review please, even if you hate it!**

Cody

A wave of cold water washed over my legs and I sat up with a scream. I didn't understand where I was. I could only see water and bright sunlight. Slowly I came to my senses. I was still on the beach; I must have fallen asleep here last night. The sun was blazing hot and the tide was coming in. No matter where I was, I had slept better than I had for months.

As I was waking up, I tightened myself for the impact of the anger and the depression. Every day for the last few months, just a few minutes after I had woken up, it had hit me. But not today, today felt different. I wasn't there yet, but for the first times in months I had some room in my mind to think.

I stretched and yawned and aimed a big, goofy grin towards the people who were staring at me. So what if they thought I was an idiot? I was glad I could finally breathe again. I slowly started to make my way through all the people. I was hungry.

I realized I was very lucky that I hadn't been robbed, though my wallet was soaked. So was my phone. I shook it, but it just gave one pathetic beep and went blank. No way to call anyone now. It had to be pretty late already. People would worry. Of course, I didn't remember a single phone number, I always used speed dial. I cursed when I realized I didn't remember the name of the hotel either. At a trip like this all hotels blurred into one.

When I reached the boulevard, I looked around to see some familiar landmarks, but to no avail. I was totally lost. My stomach growled. This was something I could handle. At a nearby food stand I bought a sandwich and some coffee and I sat down on a bench to think about what to do next.

Savoring the sun, I sipped my coffee. I felt really good; at least, as long as I didn't think about things, like where I was, how to get back to the hotel, how worried my friends must be, what the hell I was going to do about Julia and whether I was still going to quit. Argh, my stupid mind just went crazy again. Why couldn't I just live in the moment for once?

Half an hour later I still sat on the same bench in the same position and I still hadn't decided what I was going to do about any of my problems. I knew that sitting here would solve nothing, but I just didn't seem to be able to stand up and go and do something. As long as I was sitting there, I could ignore everything that was going on and just enjoy the sunlight and the view. But I knew that the moment I would get up, I had to go and solve things. I wasn't ready for that yet. So, I sat there and I looked at the sea and the people walking by. As long as I didn't let my mind slip, I felt really happy. I couldn't help smiling. I must have looked a mess, but still a lot of people smiled back. Some others avoided my eyes and just hurried on.

Another half hour later, I still sat on the bench and now I was almost ready to go and do something. I had already decided I would go and look for the arena. There was a big chance that I would find somebody there who could tell me where the hotel was. Just as I was about to push myself up and get going, I saw a familiar figure walking up to me.

"Hey Cody," Zack Ryder said as he looked at me over his sunglasses. "You've gotten everybody running around looking for you, and here you are lounging at the beach."

"Hey Zack, "I grinned at him. "You sure make my life a lot easier. I was just getting ready to look for the hotel."

Zack sat down next to me. "You have a great view here," he checked out some girls who were walking by. They reacted with bright smiles. "I hope you don't mind me asking, but why do you look like you've slept on the beach?"

I burst out in to laughter. It felt good to really laugh again. I only laughed harder when I thought about how crazy I must have looked. I wiped tears out of my eyes. "It's because I did mate, I did." I still chuckled. "I slept really well, I must say."

"What's wrong with the hotel, man? You're not really the guy to go on spontaneous camping trips." A big grin had formed around his lips at my outburst.

I grinned. "Girl trouble… loads and loads of girl trouble."

Zack nodded, understanding perfectly. "I've heard something about that. It's that girl Julia, isn't it? I can't blame you, she's hot!" I smiled, he couldn't be more right about that. "Wanna talk about it?"

I thought about that. I didn't really know Zack all that well. He had only just joined the Raw roster and we didn't hang out with the same people. Or more accurately, for the last few months I had barely spoken to anyone else other than Randy, Ted and Jack. But in the few minutes since Zack had found me, I was really starting to like him.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to man. I don't want to poke my nose anywhere it's not appreciated." His eyes grew big as he checked out another girl walking by. "Oh my god, look at that! I know something I wanna poke in her." He wolf whistled at her and was rewarded with a big smile and a small wave. "By the way, is it okay if I text Randy that you're fine? They're all worried sick about you."

I nodded, feeling really guilty now, "I would've called someone myself but my phone is dead."

He quickly texted Randy, then relaxed next to me. "I must say, you've found yourself a pretty perfect spot right here. How long have you've been sitting here?"

"Dunno," I shrugged, "At least an hour, but that's just a guess. I've got no watch, no phone and no idea where I am, and I just couldn't make myself get up and do something about it." I smiled sheepishly. I felt oddly comfortable talking to him. I wondered if it was him or just my new and improved state of mind.

"She must be something special if she's gotten you this lost. You know, she's hot and all, but she always seemed like a little bit of a drama-queen to me." I glared at him and he put up his hands defensively. "Sorry Cody, I didn't want to insult your girl."

"Never mind, I know what you're talking about. She can be a little over-emotional, but somehow that's one of the things I like about her. I just wanna protect her, you know," now I started talking I just couldn't stop myself anymore and I told him the entire story about me and Julia.

"Wow, that's unbelievable." I nodded. "So, does she love you too?" He asked

I just stared at him. "Didn't you hear what she did to me?"

He shrugged. "Yeah, mate; but she seems real sorry about it though, don't you think? And you didn't treat her very nicely either."

I must say I had expected a little bit of sympathy.

"Look Cody, I've got three younger sisters. I believe I should never treat a girl in a way I wouldn't want another bloke to treat my sisters. And for what you did, ditching her like that, I would've killed you." He looked at me to see if I was getting what he meant, and he continued, "You hurt her, she hurt you back, tough luck. So does she love you too?"

"Err, I don't know…" I couldn't say anything else, because Zack's phone went. He talked for a moment then gave me the phone.

"Cody!" Ted sounded relieved. "What the hell happened to you?" I quickly explained. "We'll be there soon. We'll pick you up okay?"

* * *

While Zack and I waited to be collected by Ted and Randy we bought some more coffee and chatted away on the bench. I soon found out that Zack was a very laidback guy, with an amazing sense of humor. He reminded me a lot of Jack, although I didn't think he was quite as naive as Jack was. Talking to him was remarkably easy and the time flew by.

"Cody!" Ted's voice boomed over the boulevard. I quickly stood up to greet my best mate, and he nearly knocked me over with his violent embrace. "I'm so glad that you're ok. What the hell happened to you? Why didn't you answer your phone?" I beamed from ear to ear when Randy reached us too, slapping me on the shoulder. He had a huge grin on his face.

"It's good to have you back, kid," He said with a choked up voice. "For a moment I was afraid…," He didn't finish his sentence, but pulled me into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry guys, I am. I fell asleep on the beach, I didn't know where I was, my phone was dead, I had no idea what to do and then I just sat here… and then Zack came. I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to get you worried."

"It's okay, kid. It's not your fault," Randy smiled again. "You know, this might be the most I've heard you say in the last few weeks." He looked at me searchingly and pulled me away from Zack and Ted, "Do you feel better, now that you've talked with Julia?"

I nodded, though tears clouded my vision again when I thought back about our talk. "I feel better about myself. It's like, you know, well I don't know… I feel like me again… heartbroken, but still me. I can breathe now, you know?"

He nodded and ruffled my hair. I pulled my head away. I didn't want to be treated like a child. "Julia, she feels heartbroken, too. I've never seen anything like it," he must have noticed my scowl, because he held his hand up to stop me from speaking, "Yeah, I know Codes, it's none of my business. But I need to say this, then I'll stay out of it. You need to figure out what you want from her and you need to tell her. At the very least you need to talk to her soon. You know she means the world to me and to see her this hurt, this broken…" He just shook his head.

I raked my hand through my hair, I didn't need this right now, I wanted to live in the moment, I wanted to enjoy how I felt today. "I'm not doing this right now Randy. Right now I feel good and I don't want to think about anything. Just mind your own business okay?"

In the taxi back to the hotel I laughed and joked with Zack. Both Ted and Randy were amazed at my sudden transformation and Teddy soon joined in the fun. Randy didn't; he sat brooding on the front seat. I didn't care. Randy was an amazing friend, but I hated him when he was acting like an older brother. I already had one big brother and that was more than enough for me.

My friends here weren't the only ones I surprised with my cheerful act. For months I had walked around in a bubble of my own misery and today I noticed for the first time that people had stopped greeting me. I got a lot of surprised smiles with just a simple greet or smile.

Even in my happy mood, Julia was on my mind all the time. I caught myself searching for her, looking for a flash of red hair. I needed to see for myself how she was doing. Even after the way she'd hurt me, all that I cared about was her happiness. But she was nowhere to be seen. Not in the hotel, not at dinner, not on the bus to the arena, she was nowhere. Finally, I couldn't handle it anymore and I asked Jack.

He shook his head at my question, "She's in her room. She ain't coming tonight. She doesn't feel good." I bit my lip. "Don't feel guilty, Cody. It's not only because of you. She had a huge fight with Mike today."

Was that supposed to cheer me up? Well, maybe it did, a little bit. I didn't mind them fighting. I hadn't forgotten how they had flirted a few days before. I did however, mind him hurting her. Later that night I took my frustration out in my match with Mike. When we were waiting to make our entrance, we didn't even look at each other, a huge scowl on both of our faces. Even his presence annoyed me. The way he stood there, fondling his titles, it made me gag. I didn't get why he was given this major push. When his music hit, he shot me one last look filled with hate and strolled out onto the ramp.

I made him pay dearly for that. For the first time in months I could pull off a good performance in the ring and I focused all my aggression on my opponent. I made him pay for every minute he had spent with Julia; I made him pay for every smile, every hug and every flirty remark. I wished I could have beaten him within a few minutes, but he gave me a run for my money and we had an intense and long match. It might even be one of the best matches I had wrestled in my career. Mike only allowed me to pin him after the director had signaled us to end the match.

I couldn't have been more surprised, or annoyed, to see Mike standing at my locker room door a little later. We had just had a match together, why hadn't he told me what he wanted then? I was in such a good mood today, I didn't feel like letting Mike ruin this.

"What do you want?" I leaned against the doorpost, arms crossed. I didn't see the need to act polite.

"Look Cody, I just wanted to say that I'm glad that you're ok." He looked a little uncomfortable. He was pathetic.

"That's really sweet of you Mike, what did I do to deserve that?" I smirked sarcastically.

"You don't!" He was getting angry now.

Good, I liked that. I hoped I would get him to lose it. I wouldn't say no to the chance to kick his ass for the second time today. Outside the ring I could at least really try to hurt him. To be honest, even in the ring we weren't really nice to each other. I was always covered with bruises after a match with him and I was sure this was the same the other way around. I let my mind wander to what it would be like if wrestling was real. I would've broken his neck already, that's a fact.

Mike's angry voice got my attention again. "Personally I don't care whether you're dead or alive. But Julia does and she would have never forgiven herself if you would have killed yourself. So that's why I'm happy that you're ok."

He started to walk away, then turned around and added, "But this better be the last time you hurt her. Otherwise I'll hurt _you_, Rhodes."

I looked surprised at Ted, who just came out the shower, and had witnessed the last bit. "What the hell was that?"

"Mike?" I called after him, "Thank you for taking care of my girl for so long. I'm thinking about getting her back. I hope you don't mind about that." I grinned when I saw his back stiffen. He halted and I hoped he would turn around to get his ass kicked, but he nearly ran away. I almost fell on the floor, I was laughing so hard. I hoped I had made him cry.

"Cody?" Ted asked me. "Are you really thinking about trying to make things work with Julia?"

Leave it to Teddy to ruin my good mood again. I pulled a face. "I don't know Teds. There's one side of me who wants nothing more and the other side just tells me to make a run for it and to never come back. I have no idea what to do. At the very least I need to talk to her, but I have no idea what to say. You know man; I don't even know what she wants from me. My mind is running haywire. I wish I had some time to think, some time to be alone, so I can figure out what to do."

"Just ask for a few weeks off then. You haven't had a vacation in ages. I bet Vince will let you go for a few weeks after Summerslam." I smiled at Ted. I really liked the idea of spending a few weeks at home. I was wondering if I should ask him myself or whether I should let Randy do it for me.


	15. I bet

**A/N really too lazy to leave a note.**

**Chapter 15 I bet...**

Julia

This day had turned out to be one of the worst in my entire life. In less than 24 hours I had managed to piss off about everyone who meant anything to me.

Sarah hadn't been subtle about any of it. In about five minutes she had bullied the entire tale out of me and she spent the next ten minutes telling me what an idiot I was. I knew there was a reason why I mostly went to my male friends when I needed comforting about something. Sarah always told me flatly what she thought about all the stupid things I did. Today she mostly went on about how I could be so stupid to sleep with Mike, when I was still in love with Cody. In between, she mentioned that she thought I was mental for loving Cody. After that she told me off for using Mike and for treating him like I had. Needless to say that she didn't side with me in any of this.

Neither did Jack or Randy, for that matter. When they came to tell me that Cody was okay, and they found out why Mike had left, they ended up being as bad as Sarah. Although I was relieved that Cody was ok, this news didn't cheer me up as much as I had expected it to do. It only became more obvious how bad I felt about how I had acted towards Mike that afternoon. I had used him shamelessly, and then I had hurt him the moment that he wouldn't give me what I wanted. The moment that I had said it, I knew exactly what I was doing. I wanted to hurt him, because he turned me down. I wanted to hurt him, because with his honesty and with his decency, he had made me feel even worse about myself than I already did. The moment I had realized how much I had hurt him and how much of a lie it had been, it was too late to take it back.

I understood why Mike had walked out on me; I would've done the same thing. But I had never thought that I could or would hurt Mike enough to make him turn away from me. Since we became friends, Mike had always been there for me, he had always put me before anything else and being around him simply made me happy. And now, through my own stupid fault, I might have lost him forever. I needed to go and apologize and I prayed that he wouldn't give up on me.

With trembling legs and stomach ache from my nerves, I knocked on his door. I was greeted by a slight smile and guarded expression in his eyes. His smile gave me hope, but the rest of his expression and his posture made me want to be swallowed by the earth. He looked beaten, exhausted, hurt, angry and sad. He didn't look like Mike. How did I manage to take a happy, confident man and turn him into rubble? I had done this to Cody, and now I had done it again to Mike.

"Mike? Can I talk to you please?" I said with a small voice that barely rose above a whisper.

He only nodded and moved back into the room. In the middle of the room he paused and turned to look at me. I could see the tension in his body and in his face. His arms were crossed and his whole posture spoke 'defense'.

"I'm sorry for hurting you Mike. I feel horrible for what I said to you. I shouldn't have said it..."

He interrupted me, "No Julia, I'm glad you did. I needed to be put back in my place." I cringed at how cold he sounded. "It's my own fault, I knew the truth, but I chose to ignore it."

"But Mike," I looked up to see if I had his attention. His expression was distant, but his eyes were still focused on mine. "It wasn't true."

Anger and confusion fought for a place in his eyes. He clenched his jaw and he turned around so that his back was towards me. I could see how he clenched and unclenched his fists, he was trembling. He was silent for a long time.

"You're driving me crazy. You're playing hot an' cold and then hot again. I'm getting sick of it." I jumped when Mike suddenly spoke again, angry and harsh. He abruptly turned around and a second later he stood only inches from me. He stared down at me. "You'd better tell me what you fucking meant by that. And you'd better tell me the truth this time." The impact of his furious look made my knees buckle.

"I… It just wasn't true. I feel like I'm going crazy. I almost feel like I'm two different people. Most of the time I'm a mess," I closed my eyes for a second to blink away the tears. "But when I'm with you Mike, I feel like myself again." A smile that seemed involuntary formed around his lips. This gave me the courage to continue.

"When I'm with you, the rest of the world just goes away and I'm simply happy, and for some reason I feel so guilty about that. And then I feel guilty about feeling guilty. But when I'm in your arms, it feels like everything will be okay again. So I guess I'm kinda using you, but it's not true that I don't care about you, or that it wasn't you I wanted. I'm sorry; I don't know how to explain it better. And most of all I'm sorry for hurting you." I looked at my feet now. Normally I could put everything into words perfectly, but at this crucial time I had failed and I knew I would lose him because of it.

"I make you happy?" He whispered, while he cupped my face to make me meet his eyes. He was smiling now. I nodded, smiling up at him, tears still clouding my vision. "Good, because you make me happy, too." He smirked, "At least most of the time." He pulled me into a hug and I relaxed against his chest. I smiled broadly as I pressed my face against his chest. His hands stroked my back, his head rested on mine, bodies pressed tightly together. The hug reassured me, and it also turned me on more than a little. Had it only been yesterday that his hands stroked my naked skin? That he had made me feel like heaven on earth?

He moved his lips to my ear and whispered, "Next time you spring me, at least make sure it's really me you want, gorgeous." His breath tickled my ear and gave me goose bumps. His words made me shiver. He reacted with a low chuckle and pulled me even closer.

I wanted to kiss him, but I didn't dare; I never wanted to hurt him again. Instead I asked him, "What do you want from me Mike?" I pulled a little out of the hug to meet his eyes.

"What I want from you?" Despite the smile around his lips, his expression was serious and the look in his eyes intensified. "I want everything!" I wanted to interrupt him, but he put his fingers to my lips to stop me. "I know what the deal is, Jules. You don't have to remind me." He cupped my face between his hands. "But I can't help what I want. And 'till you're ready to give me what I want, I'll just have to live with what you can give me."

"So we're still friends?"

"With all the benefits you want, gorgeous." A sexy grin flashed over his face, but immediately he was serious again. "Listen to me Jules, I will always be there for you, for anything you need me for, but I won't let you destroy me. I have my limits and I want you to respect them. If you can't do that..."

"I will Mike, I think I've learned my lesson." I looked at him closely, a smile was already back on his face, his eyes sparkled again. "How do you that, Mike? Flipping back into being happy in an instance?"

He threw his head back in laughter, "It's called 'letting go' gorgeous. You should try it someday; it might make your life a little easier." He let me go and sat down on his bed. "Tell me, Jules," Mike patted the bed next to him, inviting me to sit down. I sat down and hugged my knees, waiting for him to continue. "What did I do to piss you off like that? I really don't understand."

My cheeks burned and I avoided his eyes. I had hoped that this wouldn't come up anymore. "Err… can't we just forget about that? Letting go, remember?"

He was chuckling again, "No, I don't think I'll let this go. It's bound to be interesting."

"Ugh, you're so annoying sometimes."

"Only sometimes?" He raised an eyebrow, "Come on Jules, tell me, I'm dying here."

"I was angry because you rejected me," I said quickly and almost unintelligible.

He was biting his lip before he burst out in laughter. "All this, because I said _no_ to you?" He said between fits of laughter, "Hasn't anyone ever said no to you before?"

I glared at him. "Haha, it's all very funny, Julia is acting like a spoiled child, I know. Now quit it. It's not that funny."

"Oh but it is, it is," he was still laughing, tears now rolling over his face. "I don't know why I never understood this before. It's all so obvious, now. I should've played hard to get, I should've let you wait a little longer and you would've fallen head over heels for me. Too bad I'm so easy. Cody wins this one, that's for sure." His laughter died down into merely chuckles. He looked at me again and grinned when he saw me scowling at him. "I wonder if it's too late to try it now."

That stupid bastard was laughing at my misery. I wondered if I should let him get away with it, but I decided that he deserved a little fun at my expense after I had hurt him like that. I was glad one of us found this situation funny. I was so busy being annoyed that I barely heard what he was saying.

"Try what?" I only caught the last bit of his words.

"Play hard to get," He was still grinning broadly and wiped the tears off his face.

I stuck my tongue out at him, "I bet you can't," I crawled up to him and sat on his lap so I straddled him. He let his hands slip up my legs and grabbed my butt. I moaned, "I bet I can make you forget about that, before you even know what's happening."

"I like the way you're thinking, gorgeous," He tilted his head and gave me a quick kiss. He softly bit my bottom lip, before whispering against my lips, "But I wanna make this bet a little more interesting." He leant forward to whisper in my ear. "From the moment this bet is on," he paused to kiss my neck and nibble on my ear. I closed my eyes and threw my neck back moaning softly. If this was playing hard to get, I wouldn't mind him continuing it for a little while, "The first one of us who gives in, owns the other a favor. It doesn't matter what; anything, anytime, anywhere," He trailed his lips across my jaw, meanwhile wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me closely against him. His lips covered mine and he took furious, passionate control of my mouth. Within a few minutes he had reduced me to a trembling mess. He could've done anything with me right then; I wanted him to do everything with me, but he pulled back and grinned when I leant back to him to kiss him again. He shook his head. "This is the last you'll get from me Jules. Unless you want to lose this bet, of course.  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**So, they have a bet. Who do you guys want to win, and what should the winner make the loser do? I have some ideas, but there's nothing written yet, so all, yes all... interesting ideas will be taken into serious consideration.**


	16. I'm a bitch, I'm a lover

**A/N: An update, finally, I'm sorry it took so long. I have know idea when the next one will be up, since I can't seen to write it, I'm trying, I really am. **

**Just for the record: I'm shocked by the release of Micky and Shelton. It makes me really scared for Dolph, Cody and Carlito (don't know why, but I'm starting to like him a lot). Still there are a lot who I wouldn't mind leaving. But only time will tell.**

**Anyway, just to remind you, I don't own anyone, not even my muses, they belong to Legacychick. At this moment... most of her muses are lost. So if anyone has seen them, especially Cody****, send them back to her. However... I still have Mike, though he doesn't feel like inspiring me most of the time. So this chapter will be mostly Mike again... The next was supposed to be about Cody, but unfortunately, no inspiration there. But don't be afraid the story is far from over and nothing is decided yet.**

**Chapter 16: I'm a bitch, I'm a lover**

"You really disappoint me Mike," I said to him while we boarded the airplane for the flight home. "Jack at least got me into first class," I shot him a look over my shoulder. Mike was grinning broadly.

"You're getting pretty full of yourself, lady," he answered, "Next time; I'll just let you fly coach. It might put you back in your place."

"Next time, I'll just fly with Jack again. He's much less annoying than you are." We had reached our seats and I turned around and smiled sweetly.

"That's it, I've had it, I won't trade you my window seat now," He stared down at me, an amused sparkle shone in his eyes.

I felt a pull in my stomach and I was reminded of our kiss from last night. That kiss had kept me awake most of the night and gave me feverish dreams the remainder of the time. It was a good thing Mike had sent me back to my own room or I would have lost the bet already... and I was not prepared to lose this bet. Owning him a favor would be horrid; who knew what he would make me do? On the other hand, the way Mike had said, 'Anything, anytime, anywhere' had sounded very, very interesting. Still, I didn't like losing, never, no matter what… and I was stronger than a stupid man, right? If only that stupid man wouldn't be this damn sexy. I needed to get some control back, and fast.

"Aw, please?" I took a step closer to him and put my hands on his chest, "Please? I'll behave… you know I hate middle seats. And I wanna look out the window," I pouted.

He just raised an eyebrow, "I hate middle seats too, gorgeous. So no! This might teach you to be a good girl from now on." Mike cocked his head, "But you look pretty damn cute right now, Jules." He put his hands on my shoulders and leant towards me. I stared into his eyes that were full with amusement, not believing he was actually going to do this.

And of course he didn't. He pushed the straps of my backpack off my shoulders and put my bag into the overhead lockers, then stuffed his own bag in. "Come on gorgeous, you're blocking everybody's path." He quickly sat down and pulled me down after him. I fell down, sprawled onto his lap. He caught me in his arms and chuckled, "And here you are, all over me again, I'm so gonna win this bet." Needless to say, I didn't answer, I just scowled at him.

"What bet?" Jack asked, while he sat down on the seat next to us.

I started to tell him that it wasn't any of his business at the same time that Mike said, "I'll tell you later." I gave Mike a hard punch on his shoulder. He winched and rubbed the spot.

"I thought you were sitting somewhere else, Jack?" I asked him.

"Yeah, but I traded seats," I didn't like the expression in his eyes or the way he quickly added. "It's been too long since the three of us spent some time together, so I thought an endless flight might be fun."

"Jack? Who did you trade with?" I asked lightly.

Jack looked away from me. "Err… does it really matter?"

"It does! Tell me," I ordered. I was losing my patience even if I thought I already knew his answer.

"Cody asked me to trade," Even if I had already expected this, it still felt like a huge blow to my stomach. I opened my mouth to say something, but he interrupted me, "No, don't ask, I've learned my lesson, I'm staying out of this. But if you think that it's possible for Cody and Mike to sit this close together for fourteen hours without killing each other, you're even crazier than I already thought."

I slammed my mouth shut. He was right about that. I peeked at Mike, who had tensed up from even the mention of Cody. I hadn't seen their match last night, but I heard it had been ugly. Sitting here between them would have been very uncomfortable indeed.

Sitting with Mike and Jack, however, was loads of fun as usual. It didn't take very long before we slipped back into our usual routine of comfortable talking, joking, teasing and commenting about the worthless on-board movies.

When I passed Cody on my way to the bathroom, I was glad to see that he was smiling and fooling around himself with Zack and Ted. When he saw me coming, he caught my eye and gave me a sad smile. Zack said something to him and his smile broadened into a grin and he shot me a wink. That gesture made me stumble on my legs. This was something I hadn't seen from Cody in a long, long time and the effect it had on me hadn't changed in all these months. Did this mean the old Cody was coming back?

* * *

After the Australia trip we got to spend a few days at home. If I thought this would be an opportunity to get away from things, I couldn't have been more mistaken. Sarah, my so-called best friend and roommate, didn't give me the chance to forget. The fact that Evan spent the days with us didn't help my cause. The both of them kept pestering me for details and asked me annoying questions like "What the hell are you doing?" and "Do you have any idea what you want at all?" Yeah, those two were a match made in heaven.

In the middle of another endless 'Julia is stupid' session, I was saved by my phone. I quickly stood up, waved Sarah and Evan goodbye and walked to my room.

"Hey Mike," I said as I tossed myself down on my bed, "You're a life saver."

"Hello gorgeous, I'm glad I could help. What did I do exactly?"

"Oh, nothing special. Evan and Sarah are just bugging me, like all the time. But never mind, what's going on with you?"

"Nothing much, Jules. I just wanted to hear your voice." He yawned and now I thought about it, he sounded sleepy.

"Aw, you're sweet. But Mike, isn't it the middle of the night over there?"

"Yeah it is. I couldn't sleep. So tell me Jules, what are you wearing?"

"What?" I giggled, and stood up to lock my door. This might get interesting, "I'm wearing sweatpants and an old sweater. You wouldn't believe how cold it is over here. I'm just wondering, Mikey-boy, what caused your sudden insomnia? You always sleep like a baby... a huge, snoring, talking, baby, that is."

"Haha, very funny. Let's just say I was having an interesting dream. And Jules, can you please answer that question again, I didn't really like your answer." He chuckled and I could easily imagine the smirk on his face.

"You don't want me to lie, do you Mike? By the way, what are you wearing?" Two could play this game.

"Not too much, gorgeous; at home I always sleep naked. The weather is perfect down here. You should visit someday." That just wasn't fair; now I had a perfect image of him naked in his bed, in warm and sunny LA. Life was so unfair. "But you don't need to lie, you can always change… or undress if that's too much trouble," his voice lowered.

"Hmm… I don't know. It's cold here. You can just imagine me naked if that's what you want." I giggled and turned on my stomach.

"Oh, don't worry Jules. I imagine you being naked all the time. But somehow, it's more fun if you actually are."

"You bastard! You have absolutely no right to think about me like that."

"But that's where you're wrong, sexy. Since I've seen you naked, I have absolutely every right. By the way, I can't really help it. After having such amazing sex with you, I can't think about anything else. All I think about is you, being naked that is."

"You're so gonna lose this bet, Mikey," I giggled, "You want me, just admit it."

"Like hell I do," he said in a louder tone, "but I know you want me at least as much. That leaves us pretty much even. Now take off your clothes!" His voice gave me shivers. Suddenly I decided to play along with whatever he had in mind.

"Okay. Just wait a minute," I quickly stripped naked and I snuggled under my covers, then I grabbed my phone again. "So Mike, you got your wish granted. What do you want me to do now?" I was rewarded by a loud groan.

"Oh my God Jules, you're freaking killing me. Let's think, what do I want you to do?"

* * *

After the few days at home, I was back on the road again... and believe it or not, I was actually glad. After days of being bugged constantly by Evan and Sarah, who only shut up to make out and who acted annoyingly happy and bouncy all the time, I'd take anything. Evan was one of the few people whose in-ring personality closely resembled his real character. I would love for a chance to turn him heel, just to make him quit bouncing for a few minutes each day. I had already suggested this in a meeting, but apparently the public wanted him to act like that.

But, I'd like to see them try being locked up in a house with him for a few days. Don't get me wrong, I liked Evan, I really did, and I was glad he made my friend happy, but spending a few days with two hyperactive lovesick bunnies when your own love life is as fucked up as mine, is not my idea of fun. I was glad I was going to have a room to myself for the next couple of days. I wondered whether I would spend the nights alone. Mike's calls, yes there had been multiple calls, had gotten me wound-up and in a constant state of arousal. Somehow, I needed to make him lose the bet before I sprung him.

Luckily, there was enough going on to keep my mind off Mike. From now on, I was going to travel with Randy, Ted and Cody. And that could either be very good or very bad or anything in between. Worst thing was, I didn't even know if they already knew it. With everything that had been going on during the last few days in Australia, it had completely slipped my mind to mention it to Randy. So there was a big chance that I would completely surprise them when I became their new travel partner. I doubted if Cody would be pleased about that.

And if everything wasn't fucked up enough, I was having that kind of day where absolutely everything went wrong. It started with an alarm-clock that hadn't gone off, then I drank milk that had turned bad. When I was packing I realized I had forgotten to wash my favorite pair of jeans, after that I walked in on Sarah and Evan having sex in the shower, and all of this happened in the first 15 minutes that I was awake. From this moment on the day only went downhill. Now I had arrived in the hotel, after a horrible flight, all I wanted was to be alone in my room, maybe take a bath and just ignore the rest of the world.

I was standing at the reception desk, trying to check in, but of course the hotel was overbooked.

I was glaring at the receptionist. "I'm not in the mood to share a room. I don't care how you do it, I don't care who you have to kick out a room, and I don't really care what I have to pay to get you to do this, but I want a freaking room on my own... and I want it now!"

"I'm sorry miss, but we're full. I explained this to the person who does the booking for your company and he agreed that some of you can share a room."

"Look, miss…," I looked at her nameplate, "… Mitchell, I don't really care who fucked up or why. Just throw someone else out off their room. Kick John Cena out for all I care. I'll pay you $100 right now if you give me a private room."

"I'm really sorry miss, but I can't do that. Your name is on the list of people who have to share, I don't have the authority to change that." The annoying bitch was still smiling politely. I was thinking about ways to wipe that smile of her face when I heard someone say my name right behind me.

I turned abruptly, "What do you want?" I snapped. Only then did I realize it was Cody, who looked taken aback. Heat rose to my cheeks. This was the first time in months that he spoke to me directly and now I fucking snapped at him. And I knew I looked like hell. This day was getting worse and worse. "I'm sorry Cody. I'm just having a really bad day today," I sighed and nervously pushed my hair behind my ear. I barely dared to meet his eyes, but when I did, I was rewarded by an amused grin.

"I got that from your conversation with Ms. Mitchell here," He turned to the receptionist and said, "I'll share a room with Ted Dibiase. Give the lady here a room of her own, and make it a nice one. I know for a fact that John Cena won't die when he has to stay in a regular room for one night, you can give her his suite, can't you? Do it for me, please?" The girl giggled at his flirtatious smile and the wink he gave her. She nodded and started typing on her terminal. I stared open-mouthed at what was happening. This was the sweetest thing that he had ever done for me. Okay, I might have been able to force Mike or Jack out of their rooms, but that was something completely different. For all I knew, Cody hated my guts.

Cody received his room key and thanked the girl. A second later she practically threw my key at me. I didn't care, I had my private room, and with any luck it would really be a suite. I just had to make sure that I stayed away from John for the next few days. Cody grabbed my bag and walked with me to the elevator.

"Thank you, Cody. That was really sweet of you." I was really nervous being this close with him, alone in the elevator. There was still so much tension between us. For one second, I hoped the thing would stop so we would be locked up together. But with my luck today, I was pretty sure that wouldn't happen. The thing crashing down and killing us both, on the other hand, _that _would make sense today.

"Everybody deserves something nice to be done when you're having a bad day." He smiled at me. "By the way, is it true that you're writing our new storyline?"

I nodded, "I'll be writing for Legacy from now on until 'Mania. They want longer and better storylines. This means I'm gonna travel with you guys for now. I hope you don't mind… I wasn't paying attention when I signed up for it. I would never force myself on you… I know that you must still be pissed off with me…"

But before he could reply, the elevator stopped on Cody's floor. When the door opened, Mike and Evan, among others, got in. Cody pulled a face, sighed and picked up his bag.

"Look," he said before he got out, "I'll talk to you later, okay?"

I didn't know what to think about all of this. I only wanted to get to my room as soon as possible. I pushed Mike away when he tried to hug me. "Not now Mike."

"What did Rhodes do to you now?" There was jealousy and anger in his voice. I understood where this came from, but I didn't have the patience to handle his attitude towards Cody right now.

"Cody did nothing; in fact he was being really nice. You on the other hand are totally annoying." I turned around and stared at the wall.

"What the fuck," I heard him mumble, but I ignored him. Being nice to anyone was not on my agenda right now. The moment the elevator stopped I marched out without looking back.

I soon found my room and when I opened the door, I whooped. She had given me the presidential suite. This room had to be bigger than my entire house. This was crazy. It was so completely over the top. There was red velvet everywhere, red velvet and chandeliers and antique-looking furniture and thick soft carpets and a huge plasma T.V. and the best view over Seattle. As always, it was raining, but I didn't care. I would never leave this room again. Did Cena always get this lucky?

Before I could think about anything I pulled out my phone, plugged it in - did I mention I forgot to charge it, so I had no music on the plane and I was stuck with the on-board movie, which happened to be the original Marine, which was the worst movie ever, so I guess John owned me his room - and I texted Cody. "Cody, thanks so much, I have the presidential suite! You made my day! I owe you big time. Julia x"

Of course, after I sent it, I was having second thoughts immediately, but I couldn't take it back now, so I decided not to worry and just danced round my room, excuse me, my suite. Too bad we would leave tomorrow. I could really get used to this. Maybe I should think about hooking up with Cena.

I had already expected the king size bed, but the bathroom was just too much. Everything that wasn't made of white marble was made of gold. In the middle of the room stood a huge whirlpool. It was completely insane and it was mine, mine, mine. I whooped again.

Half an hour later I was sitting in my whirlpool and I was getting bored. I had never been someone who was happy doing nothing, especially not if I was doing nothing on my own. So I called Mike. I gathered that I had some apologizing to do anyway.

"Hey Mike, you'll never guess where I am right now."

"Julia, I'm busy, what do you want?" What the hell? Why was he acting like this? I hadn't been nice, I was the first to admit, but he didn't need to overreact like this.

"Come on Mikey, I'm sorry, I had the worst day ever. Can you believe I was forced to watch the Marine today?"

"That's still no excuse for treating me like shit again. I'm getting a little bit tired of your mood swings Jules."

"Sometimes I get a little bit tired of that myself. But Mike, this is who I am. With me you get fireworks. That means I'll sometimes explode in your face. You can take it or leave it."

"You are…" He sighed and I knew I was winning him over again, "You know, there's a reason why they warn you not to play with fireworks… It's dangerous." He sighed again.

"But where's the fun in life without a little danger? Come on Mike, are you saying that you can't handle me?" I teased.

"And what if I can't Jules? What if I say it's not worth it? Would you even care?"

I just stared at my phone. Did he say what I thought he just said? Tears formed in my eyes. My best friend just told me he basically thought I was not worth the trouble.

"How can you say that Mike? How can you think that I wouldn't care if I lost you?" I sniffled, "You are the single most important person in my life." I cried now. "I… you… never mind," I pushed the disconnect button and threw my phone across the room. Then I really started sobbing. This day was quickly turning into the worst one ever…

* * *

**PS. I know it's earlier on the west coast and not later, please forgive me and let's just call it artistic freedom :)**


	17. Fireworks

**A/N: Again this chapter gave me loads of trouble and I must have rewritten it at least three times and still I'm not happy about it. Maybe if I had some muses again, the thing would be better ;)**

**Have I told you already how much I like reviews? Thank you ****VolcomStoneBabe, lknights91, LegacyChick, MagdileanaO, .Eden and GreyLionDiva for reviewing the last few chapters. You are really loyal guys, you have no idea how much I appreciate that. **

**If I have more readers out there (and I guess I have seeing the story alerts and the fav's) please take a minute to leave some feedback too. Reviews make me happy and when I'm happy I take more time to write so it's in your best interest to review :D So please?**

**The entire thing is written in the POV of Mike. I know... I know, I promised you Cody from now on, but this chapter kinda happened and there's not much I could do about it. But Cody will be in the next few chapters.**

**Chapter 17: Fireworks**

"Shit," I cursed, while I stared at my phone. She had hung up on me and knowing Jules, she wouldn't answer any of my calls now. I felt like shit, again… what the hell was it about Jules that made me so unstable? It wasn't like me to let someone get to me like this. Never before had I felt this insecure, or this jealous. In fact, it had been her annoyed reaction when she saw me in the elevator that blew me over the top. After the indescribable hot phone sex that we had, I had expected her to spring me, not to bite my head off. I could still hear her sexy little voice whisper what she wanted to do to me.

Julia was playing me hot and cold again and I didn't even know if she was aware of it. Fireworks… she couldn't be more right about that… but usually that was one of the things I liked about her. With Jules you never knew what to expect, you never knew what crazy ideas would come out of her head or how your day would turn out. I cursed again. I was falling too hard for her. I desperately needed to get my normal laid-back attitude back, because if I really wanted Jules, and I did, I needed it. I needed to be the one thing Cody could never give her; safety and stability. But right now, I felt anything but stable.

I sighed and turned my attention back to my surroundings. They were shooting some backstage promos and mine was up in a minute. I decided to nail it in one take and then I would go and find Jules. I couldn't let her be sad; I couldn't leave her thinking I wouldn't be there for her.

It took a lot longer than I wanted; a lot longer than I had hoped. I almost got into a huge fight with Jack, who kept screwing up his part of the promo. I was starting to get tired of myself. Jules was screwing me up big time. Maybe I should end things between me and Jules after all? At least, until she was ready to give me what I really wanted.

After the promo I hurried back to the hotel, but finding Jules proved a whole different kind of problem. She wasn't where she was supposed to be, sharing with one of her co-workers. Jules had texted her to say she had managed to get a private room after all, but not which one. I had already asked Jack, but he didn't know, neither did Sarah, or Randy. Randy did tell me that it had been Cody who'd gotten her the room. Apparently Cody and Ted were sharing now. I don't need to explain why asking Cody himself would be out of the question, so I continued my search.

In the room that had been Cody's, I found a really annoyed John Cena, who apparently had booked a suite, because it was his wedding anniversary tonight and his wife would come over. But there had been a mix-up and now he only had a regular room. Funny thing was that Cena thought that he was the reason that Ted and Cody were sharing, but Randy had told me otherwise… this could mean that Julia was in Cena's room. It was a long shot, but I would try it. The risk was disturbing some real famous person, but who cared? I was hardly paparazzi…

I knocked on the door and it took a long time for someone to come and answer it. I was beginning to doubt myself again and I was really getting tense. I needed to find her. I didn't like her being alone when she was upset. I kept knocking and screamed her name and finally, finally the door opened a tiny bit. Through the slit I caught a glance of Julia's red hair and immediately I pushed the door further open, slipped in and closed the door behind me.

It was as bad as I had thought. Her eyes were red and puffy and there were traces of tears on her face. Her hair was wet and hung in messy strands down her face. Her lower lip was trembling and her beautiful blue eyes teared up again as she stared into mine.

A voice in my head said, _"Are you happy now, man? You just found out that Cody's not the only one who can hurt her."_

"Mike," she sobbed, "What are you doing here? I thought you were sick of me."

"Jules," in one step I crossed the distance between us and took her in my arms, "Don't think that Jules, don't you ever think that," I whispered. I didn't know how to respond, how to tell her what she meant to me, without actually telling her everything.

"I'm so sorry Mike… so sorry… didn't want to hurt you… horrible person… crappy day… can't… without you…" she spoke though her sobs, with her face buried in my shirt. I didn't understand everything she was saying to me, but what I heard was enough.

"Jules, look at me," I put my finger under her chin to make her meet my eyes. "You and I, we belong together… and there's nothing you can do or say to make me change my mind about that." Her eyes lightened at my words and her hands slipped around my neck. She pulled my head down towards her to meet my lips.

Before she kissed me, she paused and looked into my eyes. She seemed so insecure. I hoped she couldn't read all my feelings for her in my eyes. The moment I stepped into her room, I had decided to fight for her. I would make her fall for me… and keeping my distance wouldn't help me with that. I knew that right now, she needed to take the initiative... and this had nothing to do with our bet. I couldn't care less if I lost it, but taking the lead would make it too easy for her. I wanted her to make her own decisions. This would show her how she really felt about me.

She sighed, closed her eyes and pressed her lips against mine. Her hands tangled in my hair and she pushed against me. Her tongue traced my lower lip and I slightly parted my lips to allow her to deepen the kiss. The way she was taking control now made my head spin. Her hands traveled down my back and slipped under my shirt. They were like ice and goose buds immediately formed on my skin. I gasped; she smiled against my lips and continued to tease me with them. Her lips trailed across my jaw, planting nibbling kisses that drove me crazy. My arms pinned her against me. We'd better not get interrupted this time…

"So, Mikey," She whispered in my ear, "Are you ready for some fireworks?" She pulled back a little bit to look at me. The lust in her eyes was obvious, but there was also a hint of uncertainty.

"I don't think I've ever wanted anything as much as I want you, Jules." A bright smile flashed over her face. Did she even realize what I meant by this? I cupped her face in my hands and stared in her eyes. "And how about you Jules, are you sure you want me?" I realize I was pushing my luck here, but I didn't want her to act on an impulse and feel sorry immediately after. She was silent for a while, still staring in to my eyes. Very slowly she unwrapped herself from my arms, turned around and started walking off. Silently I cursed…

But then she halted and looked over her shoulder with a seductive smile playing across her lips. She let her bathrobe slip down from her shoulders. She was naked underneath. I tried to take all of her in at the same time. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, she was perfect, all curves and smooth cream skin which would feel so soft under my hands.

"Aren't you coming Mike? I have a pretty nice bed here." Only now did I take my eyes off her long enough to take in my surroundings. My mouth fell open. This must be the freaking presidential suite. No wonder Cena was pissed off. But even a room this grand couldn't distract me for long.

I slowly stalked towards her. I walked around her, still taking everything in. She swallowed as she followed my moves with her eyes. I paused as I stood behind her. I wanted to make this slow, I needed to make it something she would remember forever. I ran my fingertips over her arms. She shivered under my touch. I could hear her breathing quicken already. My fingers entwined with hers and I wrapped our arms around her waist, pulling her close to me.

I let my lips trail back and forth over her shoulder, nibbling and planting playful kisses. I buried my nose deep in her hair, and took in her intoxicating smell. "You smell so good," I whispered.

My lips travelled to her earlobe, softly nibbling and sucking and she uttered tiny noises and whimpers of delight. I pulled her even closer against me. The sensation of her being naked, vulnerable and this willing in my arms gave me a major rush.

"So gorgeous, you had some pretty interesting ideas on the phone earlier. Maybe you want to show some of them in real life?" I asked playfully.

She turned her head around to meet my eyes. The emotion in them was unreadable but extremely intense. I felt drawn to her and didn't take the time to think about it. I found her lips and our furious kiss made every thought flee my mind. I existed as nothing more than burning desire, and by the way she hungrily answered my kiss, I could tell she felt the same way.

The next morning I lay on the bed, already dressed. I was waiting for her to get ready. I stared at her frantic packing and pacing. I think she much have redressed about three times. I didn't understand; nothing special was happening today. It would be a day like all others, just a ride to the next city, some meetings and a house show. But she seemed so nervous.

"Jules, what's wrong?" I walked up to her and hugged her from behind. For a short moment she leant against me and I could feel her relax. But then she untangled herself from me again and started looking through her bag once more.

"Do you think I look okay like this?" She stared in the mirror. "No, this shirt is ugly; I don't know why I bought it."

"Jules, you look gorgeous, you always do. There's nothing wrong with that shirt. Come here," I held out my hand. "Come here and tell me what the problem is." She turned around and stared at me. She was chewing her bottom lip. "Jules, come here, you're scaring me. What's making you so nervous?" Still she didn't answer but she turned around and walked into the bathroom.

My stomach was turning into a hard knot. There were not many things she wouldn't tell me, but when she did, they mostly had something to do with Cody.

"Jules, look at me and tell me what's wrong now." I was starting to lose my patience and I sounded harsher than I had wanted. I walked up to her and cupped her face in my hands. "Please tell me… you aren't travelling with me and Jack today, are you?" Slowly she shook her head. Tears shimmered in her eyes again, but this time I wasn't going to fall for them. First she would tell me what the hell was going on. "Speak Jules, I'm waiting."

"I'm traveling with Randy from now on…" She was silent again and tried to break my gaze, but I was still holding her face so I wouldn't let her.

"With Randy and…?" I raised my eyebrow.

"And Ted… and Cody…" she sighed, "I'm writing their storyline from now on…"

"Why didn't you tell me earlier? How long have you known this?" I'm sure my eyes must have been shooting daggers, because I could feel her cringe.

"About a week, it was decided in Australia." Her lip trembled and tears started to fall from her eyes, but I was too angry to care about this. She was playing with my feelings and by now I've had enough. I pushed her away.

"A week? Jules, you had plenty of time to tell me, plenty… I thought we were friends. You know how I feel about you, you know how I feel about Cody and now…"

"But I kinda signed up for it by accident… I wasn't paying attention…" And there were the excuses again.

"Julia," I sighed, "I don't care that you have to write for them, I don't care that you're travelling with them, I'm pissed off that you haven't told me." I started to walk away, but she blocked my path.

"I'm sorry Mike, I just didn't know how to tell you without hurting you," she tried to hug me, but I pushed her away.

"Well, that didn't work out well, did it? You've gotta stop playing games and you've gotta start thinking about how you treat other people. And quit the tears, Julia, I'm sick of them." I pushed her out of my way and left the room.

"What did she do this time?" Sarah turned around from the front seat. Evan was driving and I was in the back of the rental with Jack. I had barely said a word since I got in the car. I just stared out the window with a dark expression on my face and I tried my very best to ignore the curious glances Jack was giving me.

"She _forgot_ to tell me she would be traveling with Cody from now on." Sarah pulled a face. "You know, I'm getting sick of the way she's been treating me."

"You let her walk all over you Mike. She's all drama and you let her pull you along with her. You never did before, that's why you got along so great. But now she's starting to like you on a whole different level and she's desperate to be in control again." Sarah continued.

"Don't let her have it, man," Evan added, "We can't have more women in control. Look at me, I'm screwed," he chuckled.

"Shut up Evan, I'm being serious here," Sarah said with a smile around her lips.

"You see?" still chuckling, he put his hand on Sarah's knee. She leant towards him to kiss his cheek, then turned back towards me.

Before she could speak again, Jack did, "Do you really think she's worth it, Mike?"

"Jack!" Sarah exclaimed indignant, "You can't say that. She's your friend too!" Evan bit his lip. I saw he was trying very hard not to laugh. That was Jack all right, blunt, insensitive and dead right.

"So what if she's my friend? Can't I speak my mind, then? I say this to you and I'll say it to her face. She might be a great girl, but she's also a drama queen. Nobody would even let her get away with that if she wasn't this goddamned beautiful. And I tell you, right now she's playing games, again, I might add. She did that with Cody, and now she's doing it to Mike," He turned to me, "I've told you before, mate, you need to be careful." Sarah and I both stared at Jack; not really believing things like that would come out of his mouth. Evan sniggered. I wondered if he had been thinking along the same lines.

"Cody was the one playing games with her. Don't you dare blame her for that, Jack!" Sarah snapped, "I know Cody's your friend but I really don't get why. That guy is a jerk. Julia is way too good for him. You should've stayed out of that and things wouldn't have been this big of a mess." Ha, I knew I wasn't the only one who blamed him for putting them together on the airplane.

"Why does everyone blame me for that?" Jack snapped back, "I can't help that they love each other and I don't feel guilty for trying to help them out. How should I have known that Mike would fall for her too? As far as I knew he was only trying to get laid," It felt like watching a tennis game, and it would've been a lot funnier if I didn't feel like I was the ball.

Before Sarah could react, he continued, "And I think they could make it work. I'm sorry Mike, but I do. I really don't get why you hate Cody this much, Sarah. I understand why Mike does, but not you. You don't even know him, yet you talk about him like he's dirt trapped beneath your shoe. Things might have been a lot different if you hadn't told Julia time after time what a horrible person you think Cody is. You know that you're one of the few people she really listens to. You're the one who should stop acting like such a stuck-up bitch and let them work things out for themselves." Ouch, game, set and match for Mr. Swagger.

"Don't you dare talk to my girlfriend like that, Jack." Evan replied with ice in his voice. He pulled her close for a moment. Jack started to speak again. "No Jack, shut up, it's clear how you think about things. You might be right, at least partly, but let's try and keep things civil here okay?" We all sat in silence now. A few minutes later he pulled into a gas station and parked the car, "Come on, we'll take a break to cool down a little."

I was glad to be able to leave the car and the charged atmosphere in it. I would've given everything to be here with Jules and with Jack. I walked a few yards and put my hands in my pockets. It was cold and the wind felt great against my face. I leant against a fence and watched Evan comforting Sarah. They made a great couple. I was jealous of them; would I ever find something quite like that? Could Jules be the one for me? I bit my lip. She needed to be, because I couldn't bare to think that all this pain would be for nothing.

"Hey man," Jack had walked up to me and leant on the fence next to me, "I'm sorry about that."

"Don't worry, mate," I said, "I can handle you speaking your mind. Sarah can't I guess," I smirked, "Is there something wrong Jack? I've never seen you lose it like that before. Not that I don't like it." I grinned.

He shrugged, "She had it coming. I was sick of her talking shit about Cody all the time." We stared ahead in a comfortable silence.

"Jack?" I asked. "Err… do you think… err… do you know what Cody wants from Julia?" The moment the words left my lips I felt heat flushing to my cheeks. I felt like a teenager.

Jack was silent for a while, I didn't really expect him to answer my question, but after a minute or so he started talking, "I don't know. I really don't. I don't think he even knows himself. I can tell you what I think, but it's mostly guesses," He looked at me to see if I wanted him to continue. I did, so I nodded. "I think, no I'm sure that he still loves her and that deep down he wants nothing more than to try to make things work between them. And I think they need a chance to try that, I'm not sure if it'll work out, but if they don't try I'm afraid that neither of them will ever get over the other,"

"So you think that I should keep my distance and let him have her?" I scowled.

He shrugged, "Something like that, yeah. I don't think there's much you can do to stop him anyway." We started walking back to the car. Evan had already gotten in, but Sarah waited outside the car. I thought she was waiting to talk to Jack, but she just shot him an ice cold look and turned towards me. Jack pulled a face and got in the car.

"Mike," Sarah said softly, "I think that Julia really likes you, but she has no idea what she wants or what's good for her. She can be a bitch sometimes, but underneath she's a really good person. She's just spoiled rotten. You should meet her brothers; they would all do anything for her. Jack was right about one thing, she is too beautiful for her own good. You need to show her that she can't manipulate you. I think you can be the best thing that ever happened to her. She needs a guy like you."

"Thanks Sar, that means a lot to me. I know Jules, and I'm sure can take the bad things with the good… but everything would be a lot easier to put up with if I didn't know that Cody only needs to snap his fingers to have her back."


	18. Off Balance

**A/N: I want to thank my loyal reviewers **_.Eden, lknights91 _**and of course**_ Legacychick_** for your very kind reviews. **

**My begging in the last chapter hasn't given me more reviews or new reviewers, so I give up. If you don't want to review then don't... **

**Okay final idea, I'm trying for desperate measures here. if you don't want to write anything, just grade it: 1 meaning you hate it, 10 meaning it's the best thing you ever read and you think I'd better go and find myself an editor (in case you're wondering, I don't expect any tens, especially not for this chapter).**** And believe me you don't want to know all the sarcastic and mean things I'm thinking about on here********, because then no-one will read on anymore LMAO!**

******And just for the record this last bit is obviously not meant for all of you who usually or even sometimes review. Even if you haven't on the last chapter, I won't forget **_VolcomStoneBabe, MagdileanaO_****** and **_GreyLionDiva_****** for reviewing in the past. I blame no-one for not reviewing every chapter. Having said this, I don't blame anyone who won't review this chapter (but still, please do). I'm not very proud of it. I don't work very well within a structured outline, but I have some chapters further on already written, so this had to happen. I like it more when I can let my characters run around and do things I don't expect. But on the bright side I love upcoming chapters 19 and 21. I'm not sure yet on chap 20, I'm still waiting for my beta-reader to get back to me and tell me if I can like it :s**

**A final note (hmm just wondering if anyone even reads these A/N, I always do, but it might just be me, still I like writing them, it's like twitter, sending out all my rambling thoughts into the world, but with more space to do so, I wonder if I should try blogging) I noticed that I gotten myself carried away with the crazy, emotional, drama-queen Julia. lknights91 said it brilliantly** _"julia seems to have some serious mental and emotion problems so i feel bad for everyone around her, i feel like Mike and Cody are being strung along" _**  
****She's lot of fun to write like that, but it will mess up the little bit of an outline I have for this story if she keeps acting like this. I don't mind unhappy endings, but someone strangling her isn't the thing I had in mind. Neither is her slitting her wrists in an attempt to get attention from one of the other... So she'll try to behave a litte bit from now on.**

**Disclaimer: I own no-one, not even my muses. My eternal thanks to Legacychick for sharing them with me. **

**Chapter 18 Off Balance**

"God damn it, you dumb, stupid bitch," I stared in the mirror and grabbed the sink. This was the third time this week that I had treated Mike like shit. I had no idea what had come over me. It would've been so easy to tell him, _'Guess what Mikey, I was so busy thinking about you that I accidentally signed up to write for Legacy.'_ You see, not difficult at all. I could've just told him to begin with, he probably wouldn't have even been angry with me if I'd told him from the start.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid," why did I keep doing this? He was right, I was playing games, I was playing games with the one person I shouldn't; my best friend. I wasn't having a bad day, I was having a bad year, and the worst thing was that I could only blame myself for most of it. The wrong things seemed to slip out of my mouth all the time and I had made bad decision after decision. I was sick of me, I was sick of falling apart, sick of lashing out whenever something didn't suit me and I was sick of the way I had treated the most important person in my life.

I had made a huge mess of my life and I needed to live with the pieces. I needed to show Mike that I could change. But, deep down I was afraid I had pushed him one time too many. I would speak to him tonight, but first I needed to make it through a car ride with Cody.

* * *

"Hey Julia," Randy was the first to see me when I got to the parking lot, and when he did he pulled me in for a hug. His inquisitive look made me nervous. I didn't want him to notice that I had been crying. I couldn't explain things to him, not while Cody was near. "Are you okay, hun? If you can't handle this, we'll find some other way to work on the storyline."

I smiled up at him. "I'm fine Randy, some stuff happened this morning. I'll tell you later. I could use an unbiased opinion." Randy nodded and released me from his hug. He surprised me by kissing my forehead.

"Did Mike manage to find you yesterday?" Ted asked. I peeked around Randy to where Ted stood with Cody. I didn't miss the annoyed look on Cody's face. I only nodded, my cheeks growing hot. This was another thing I didn't want to talk about when Cody was near. Randy grinned, probably understanding why I was blushing. Damn, I never should have told him about me and Mike.

"Cody, get Julia's bags and put them in the trunk, we gotta get going," Randy ordered.

Cody pushed his hands in his pockets and scowled. "Someday you're gonna stop pushing me around Randy." He replied, but he picked up my bags nonetheless.

"As long as you're the youngest, I get to push you around as much as I want. Especially since you obey this nicely," Randy chuckled and shot me wink.

"So Julia, any chance that we'll get a new member for Legacy soon? A new leader might be nice…" Cody smiled at me. "By the way, did you enjoy your room? Was it really the presidential suite?"

"Damn…" Randy muttered, "What the hell did you do? I would stay away from Cena if I were you… I can't believe it, every time I turn my back, you pull off stupid stunts. You better shut up about this and hope no one finds out." His eyes went from me to Cody and back. Cody and I looked at each other like little kids getting punished. We collapsed in giggles. Randy glared at us, then shrugged and got in behind the wheel. "Get in kids, it's getting late."

"Hey, I was supposed to drive today," Cody pulled a face.

"I'm sure as hell not getting in that car if you drive. You nearly killed us last time, and the time before that, remember Randy?" Ted looked annoyed and pulled Randy from the driver's seat. "We've been over this three times already. Cody will drive, and that way we'll all stay alive."

"But Cody drives like a grandma…" Randy muttered.

"If by that you mean that I don't break all speed limits or ignore every traffic rule that exists, you're dead right. It's hard to find someone that meets your standards when it comes to driving. My god Randy, you even had something to say about the way that NASCAR-racers drove."

Randy signed, "That was some mean storyline. I wish I could've kept that car. My very own Legend Killer NASCAR. It was the most beautiful thing I ever saw."

"It was fake Randy, don't forget that." I smiled at their playful bickering. Maybe this wouldn't turn out to be as uncomfortable as I had feared.

Half an hour later we were well underway, Randy was in the back with me, still muttering about the way Cody drove. Honestly, I could see nothing wrong with it, he might drive a little slow, but seeing the smirk on his face when he looked at me in the rearview mirror, he was doing it to annoy Randy. By the look on Randy's face, he was doing a great job.

Another thing he was succeeding in perfectly was making me lose my balance. He was back to his old self; he seemed completely relaxed again. I was happy to see him smile again and more than happy that he seemed to have forgiven me, but it seemed like we were back to square one.

"So Julia," Ted's voice broke through my thoughts, "Tell us what you have in store for us."

It took a few seconds before I realized he was talking about work. That was the last thing that was on my mind right now, but it was the only reason I was here and it was the reason I was fighting with Mike again, so I knew I had better focus and make it worth it. I would make it the best storyline I had ever written. "I was thinking about writing you into several storylines, both single, tag and trio. That way you can have several feuds, even at the same time and you and Cody can build your single careers. I've gotten a lot of freedom to do what I want, though unfortunately it can't be all about you, so there are some limitations. There are two things I'm ordered to do. One; Legacy must be broken up by the time Wrestlemania ends and two; Cody will feud with Mike."

"What?" Cody spat out, "Why? I don't wanna..." I could practically see his pout from the back seat.

"Orders from Vince directly. Apparently Vince loved the chemistry between you two in your last match," I answered. Believe me; writing that bit of the storyline wouldn't be fun for me, either.

"You need to grow up, Cody. You'll have to work with a lot more guys that you don't like and if you let your emotions get the most of you, you're gonna get injured," Randy snapped.

"I'm thinking about maybe writing you into a feud for the U.S belt, and I hope to get to some part where you guys hold all of Raw's titles…"

* * *

When we got to the hotel a few hours later, I had several great ideas to work with and I couldn't wait to start working on my first draft. With Cody, I hadn't made much progress. He was friendly, but that was all. He was obviously keeping his distance and I had no idea how to deal with him. I didn't get the opportunity to talk to him after the ride, because he disappeared before I could even get out of the car.

I felt defeated, and Randy pulled me along to the hotel bar to cheer me up. I had just started to explain how much of a mess I had made of things when I felt two arms hug me from behind.

"Hey gorgeous, did you have fun today?" Mike let me go, shot me a wink and clasped hands with Randy. "Please never leave me alone with Sarah and Jack again, they've spent the entire ride bickering." He sat down on the stool next to me. "I never thought Jack could get this angry, or Evan for at matter. By the time we arrived I was sure Evan was gonna knock Jack out." I stared at him open-mouthed. Mike was talking to me like nothing had happened and nothing he said was making any sense. Jack and Sarah fighting? Evan getting so angry that he would get violent? Had I entered some sort of alternative reality while I wasn't looking? "Can I travel with you guys from now on? Man, this car trip makes traveling with Cody sound like fun."

"What… why… how…" I stuttered.

He shrugged, "Believe me, you don't wanna know. And to think that Sar is supposed to write for Jack right now. I wonder if she'll ask for another assignment or if she will take revenge some other way. I see a feud with Santino coming up."

"Hey, we writers never take advantage of our power…" Both Mike and Randy stared at me with eyebrows raised, "Okay, okay, we do, but only when you guys really deserve it. All we ask is to be treated nicely."

"In that case, why don't I take you out to dinner tonight?" Mike threw me a dazzling grin when I nodded, before he walked off after kissing my cheek.

"What the fuck?" Randy mumbled, "I thought you guys were fighting?"

"Yeah, so did I," But I wasn't going to complain.

My friendship with Mike was back to normal from that night on. He was back to being my funny, charming and laid back friend. I didn't understand what made him take this 180 degree turn again, but I would do anything to keep it this way. For now, we were back to being just friends. We flirted, but nothing happened. He had seemingly given me another chance, and I really didn't want to use him again. He might say that he was okay with it, but every time we had slept together before, things blew up and I wasn't prepared to risk my friendship with him again.

We did spend most of our time together and after a week or so we started to spend the night together again, but once again, it was completely innocent. I slept a lot better like that, comfortable and safe in his arms. Time and time again I wished I would fall out of love with Cody so I could be with Mike without knowing for sure that I would hurt him. Mike and I didn't talk about Cody. He noticed when I felt down and he never failed in cheering me up. Mike kept me sane the following weeks of traveling.

Cody, on the other hand, nearly drove me crazy. He was nice enough, even flirty at times, but distant at the same time too. His old attitude was back and no matter how hard I tried, he didn't show me what was behind it. He didn't allow me to be alone with him or have any meaningful conversations about anything. He was all jokes and crap. I caught him staring at me occasionally, but the moment he noticed me watching him, his walls went back up. A few other times he was obviously talking about me to Ted, but again, the moment I caught them - wham - back to cocky Cody. It annoyed me senseless. Ted was starting to treat me differently as well. He had always been friendly, though we had never been close... but now he was cold somehow. Sometimes I wondered if I was seeing ghosts, at other times I wondered if Ted felt the same way about me as Sarah did about Cody; that I was bad for his best friend.

Right now it seemed like they both got their wish granted and nothing would ever happen between me and Cody again. But I needed to know. This uncertainty and not knowing was worse than actually being rejected. Randy warned me into giving Cody space, and he also said Cody would come and talk to me when he was ready, but I was starting to lose my patience.

When I found out that Cody would have a few weeks off starting next week, I had had enough. No fucking way was I going to wait for another 3 weeks to know what he wanted. By now, I almost wanted him to say that he wanted nothing to do with me anymore, so I could fall apart in peace while he was away. I needed to have my life back. Cody would talk to me, one way or another.

* * *

**So like it? Hate it? Why? Come on, review or grade! Please?**

**Check out my poll, who do you want her to end up with?**

**And is there someone out there who wants to make a banner for this story? I have the pics, but not the talent :( **


	19. Complicated

**A/N: Wow, I can't believe my ranting about the reviews in last chapter actually worked. It's also great too see that people actually read my authors note. **

**Thank you **_MagdileanaO, Kristl, lknights91, Marcibelle, BellaDaydream, .Eden, VolcomStoneBabe, GreyLionDiva, Mrs Scarlett_ **for taking the time to share your thoughts about the last chapter. This one is for you all! Please review again! I like all ideas and constructive criticism too. Ratings are welcome again too. **

**The last bit isn't beta-ed so sorry if the grammar sucks. I added it on the last minute.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own no-one not even my muses, but the Miz-muse loves me more *sticks out tongue to Legacychick*. I do own my Carlito-muse. Does anyone have any idea what to do with him? I won't add him to this story though, but am thinking about adding a little bit of Dolph later on, what do you think?**

**And please, can someone make a banner for me? Or does anyone knows someone I can beg to make me a banner? Don't you wanna see what Julia looks like? Or what picture I have in mind when I write Mike or Randy (both extremely hot pics, I promise)? Still looking for a killer Cody pic though, anyone have one in which he is smiling?**

**Chapter 19: Complicated**

Cody

Being forced to be around Julia like this was killing me. I realized I wasn't treating her the way I should. I could see how insecure I made her, but my attitude was about the only thing that kept me from pulling her into my arms and kissing her senseless... and that was the last thing that we needed to happen. Yes, I still loved her, more than ever I might add, but deep down I was convinced that she was bad for me. I was scared as hell to let her get close to me again. I would never let a girl destroy me like that again. It just wasn't worth it.

The problem was that seeing her all the time and not being able to hold her, to kiss her or even to really talk to her made me unhappy as hell. I was starting to fear that Julia and I were a perfect example of 'can't live with you, can't live without you'. Countless times I had decided to go and talk to her, only to chicken out at the last minute.

Not knowing what was happening between her and Mike didn't help either. I knew he was in love with her; I could see that in his eyes when he stared at her. I'd never seen them kiss or anything like that, but they were very close. They flirted, and simply spent most of their free time together. I was afraid that if I took too much time to make up my mind, she would have moved on with him. I know it was low of me, but I kept flirting with her. I wanted her to keep thinking of me in the weeks I would be at home.

Both Randy and Ted told me off for doing that, but for completely different reasons. Teddy was concerned for me and wanted me to forget about her. He was convinced that she would only hurt me again and begged me to take the time at home to try and get over her. I laughed when he asked me that. I would if I could, truly I would.

My conversation with Randy went a little different. The moment he stalked into my room, I realized he had the older brother look plastered all over his face again. I sighed and braced myself for an unpleasant ten minutes. I slumped down on a chair, and leant back while crossing my arms.

"Well Randy, tell me, what did I do this time?" I asked with a smirk on my face. Yeah, I was sick of the way he kept pushing me around.

"Don't you dare show me that attitude," He towered over me with a glare. In the past that look had made me cower, but I wasn't that boy anymore.

"I'll show you any attitude I like Randy. You'd better remember you're not my father or my boss. As far as I know we're friends. Maybe you should try to behave like one. If you can't do that, you know where the door is," I picked up the remote and turned on the T.V. He grabbed it from my hand, turned the T.V. off again and threw the remote through the room. It bounced off the wall and fell on the floor in pieces.

"As your friend it's my job to tell you when I think you're acting like an idiot. You're playing games with Julia again, and as her friend I'm allowed to kick your ass around until you stop doing that," He sounded furious. I looked up at him again. He was pacing through my room with his fists clenched and a huge scowl on his face.

I stood up and walked towards him. If he would hit me, I wanted to be able to defend myself and get some punches in myself. "You're not here as my friend, you're here as hers. And I don't blame you; I realize I'm being a jerk, but things are really complicated. I know you care about Julia, but not once in the last months did you try to listen to my side of the story, never did you think she was in the wrong. You always take her side. It makes me wonder what's behind that," I cocked my head and glared at him. A look of confusion and shock flashed over his face. "All you ever do is tell me what to do. That's not how I see friendship. So if you think I'll start confiding in you now, you're wrong mister. I'll tell you this; the last thing I want is to hurt her. Believe me or not, I don't care. Now get out, I'm tired and I wanna sleep." I walked to the door and opened it for him. He looked shocked; I never talked back to him like this. No one ever did. Well, except for Julia of course. He stomped to the door, but just before he left my room he turned around, grabbed me by the collar and slammed me up against the wall.

"I'm not your friend, huh? I've not tried to listen to you before? You listen up, _buddy_. The last six months have been hell for me. I've seen you destroy yourself and nothing I said or did had any effect. I don't listen? You don't talk Cody, you never do. All you do is put up that stupid attitude. Don't blame others for what's happened to you, look at yourself for once. You might smile again, but otherwise you're back to your old self. And I tell you this, it ain't pretty. So if you decide that you want Julia, you better make sure you're good enough for her."

With those words left to linger, he let me go and stalked out the room. As much as I wanted to shrug his words off, I couldn't. I knew he was at least partly right. I was hiding behind my attitude; I was hiding behind walls that were so high that even I didn't know what was behind them. The only one I had ever let in was Julia, and look what that had brought me.

* * *

Julia

I walked through the hotel trying to work up the courage to talk to Cody. He was leaving tomorrow and I wanted to speak to him before he left. He had avoided me again over the last few days. He had been silent in the car and today he hadn't even shown up; instead he had caught a ride with Zack and some of the other guys. I couldn't blame him, things were really uncomfortable again, but with their busy schedules and Cody leaving soon we needed all the time to work. Not to mention that I was approaching my deadline.

Most of the storyline was already written, but Cody's feud with Mike gave me a headache. Vince had had another great idea; I had to write a diva in it as well. Them feuding over the U.S.-title wasn't enough. If Vince would only know how close he was to the truth. Not that he would care; he would only laugh his ass off. I hoped that nobody would get hurt in this. Both Mike and Cody had the reputation of being extremely aggressive in the ring and it wouldn't be long before someone thought of letting them have some extreme matches. The thought of them being in a cage together made me shiver. I didn't really believe they could keep things professional - not in that kind of environment - and I had no way to prevent it. As far as the storyline went, it was a great idea, so I could only hope that no one would find them important enough to care... but with the push Mike had been given, that was another farfetched hope.

I shook my head trying to get the thought of Cody, or Mike, lying bloody and unconscious in the ring out of it, and instead tried to focus on what I wanted to tell Cody if he gave me the chance. When I entered the elevator, Ted was already in it.

"Hey Ted, do you know if Cody is in his room? I need to talk to him." I asked.

He sighed, "Can't you just leave him alone? Haven't you hurt him enough already?" I cringed at his angry tone.

"I just need to know Ted," I replied with a small, choked up voice. I bit my lip; I didn't want to show him how much he hurt me by those words. "Don't you understand that I need to know? If he says he doesn't want me, I'll leave him alone…"

"I guess I can't ask you to give up yourself?" He shook his head, "It's not that I don't like you Julia, but Cody is my best friend and I don't want him to get hurt again. He's fighting with Randy and neither of them want to tell me what it was about, so I guess…" He looked at me with his eyebrow raised. I avoided his eyes and looked at the floor.

"I can't help what Randy does. He's stubborn as hell and he sees me as his little sister. I can talk to him if you want, but I don't know if it'll do any good," I glanced at Ted and he nodded, and about Cody, I don't want to hurt him Ted, I really don't and I never did, I just… I love him Ted, I love him more that I can explain and as much as I want to, I can't let him go. Believe me, I'd change things if I could, but I don't think I can be happy without him, so as long as there's the slightest chance he'll want me, I'm gonna take it. Please don't hate me for that, Ted. It's bad enough that my best friends hate Cody this much," I met his eyes when I said this and he nodded with a small smile around his lips.

"The two of you are so much alike, I wonder how that will work out," He mumbled, then he shrugged, "I don't know where Cody is, I just came from a signing myself. If he isn't in his room, check the gym, but he might also be in town with Zack and Jack. I heard him mentioning something like that this morning." I pulled a face. That wasn't very useful, he basically told me that Cody could be anywhere.

* * *

I stood at his room getting ready to knock when I heard his voice right behind me. "Julia?" I turned to face him. He must have come right from the gym. He was wearing sweat pants and a sweaty t-shirt and he looked simply delicious. He bit his lip and nervously shifted from one foot to the other. He mirrored my feelings exactly.

"Err… Cody, I really need to talk to you before you leave. I'm going crazy and you'll be gone for weeks and I can't go on not knowing, and…" I was silent again. Inwardly I kicked myself. Great Julia, great speech, now he was really going to see me as an idiotic stalker.

He just stood there and looked at me with his impossible blue eyes, his expression was unreadable. I wished I could see what was going on inside his mind. For what seemed like an eternity, he was silent, chewing his bottom lip. Then he shook his head.

"We need to talk, I know that." He slowly touched my cheek with the back of his hand. I trembled under his touch. "But not now okay? It's too soon. I just don't know what to make of everything yet. Please give me the space I need. We'll talk after I'm back, I promise."

What else could I do other than nod and try to hold back my tears? It sounded like a rejection, but the way he touched me and the way he looked at me said something else. I was devastated and I had no idea how to get through the next couple of weeks. I only wanted to turn around, go to my room and cry my eyes out.

I had already walked away, when I heard him say my name again. I walked back towards him, meanwhile looking him in the eyes.

"Yes, Codes?"

He hesitated now. "I just need to know one thing, before I leave..." I waited but he didn't say anything else.

"Cody," I whispered. "I don't know what you want to ask me, but can I please say one thing to you? I will give you all the space you need after that." He nodded, his eyes thankful. "I'm really glad you seem to be doing better. I missed that side of you." I touched his hand. "In Australia, when we talked in the stadium, you asked me if I knew what it feels like to not know if you'll ever be whole again?" I looked at the ground, not sure if I dared to continue. He put his finger under my chin to make me meet his eyes again.

I swallowed then I continued, "I do know, Cody. The only time I've ever felt complete was when I've been in your arms."

He made a choking sound, deep in his throat. "What are you saying Julia?" We stood really close now, both of us trembling from our emotions.

"I love you, Cody. I really want... no – need - to be with you. But, it's up to you to decide if you want to be with me." My voice fluttered and I was terrified of his reaction. I had just put my heart in his hands.

He pulled me into a tight embrace. "It's not about what I want, Julia. I know what I want. It's you," he whispered those words in my ear. "But I need to decide if it's good for me to be with you. I almost let you destroy me. You caused me so much pain. I have to decide if I'm strong enough to let you in again."

The last few minutes I had managed to hold back my tears, but this hurt too much. Tears streamed down my face. "I'm so sorry Cody."

He pulled back a little bit and softly kissed my lips. "I know you are. It's not your fault, beautiful. I just love you too much."

* * *

Mike:

I was in a great mood. I had the feeling that everything would work out the way it should. My friendship with Julia was back like it should be and I had a feeling it wouldn't be long before I could take the next step again. Cody would be out of the picture for weeks and I hoped that with him out of sight, I could finally convince her to pick me. She might still love Cody, but she would get over that in time. I needed to have her before he had made up his mind. Right now he was being the jerk he had always been, and that was just the way I needed him to act.

I can't even begin to explain how difficult it had been to step over all the hurtful things she had done, but Sarah had been dead right. I had let her manipulate me, I had let her pull me along in her drama and that was the last thing I needed to do. She might not know it herself, but I knew she was falling for me and she was panicking about that. As for me, I had fallen head over heels for her. If giving her an easy out for the things she did to me, was the price for having her in the end, I would gladly pay it. I knew she felt guilty about it anyway, and I didn't really feel the need to punish her. The only thing I needed was to have her in my arms again. And believe me, the look on hers and Randy's face when I bounced up to her like nothing had happened had been priceless.

Yeah, everything was going as planned and as of tomorrow I had three weeks of not having to see that jack-ass to look forward to. Softly whistling I stepped out of my hotel room to go to the gym. I locked the door and when I turned around the sight a few doors down the hall made me freeze. Wide-eyed I stared at the people right in front of me, deeply caught in conversation. So far for life working out as it should be. I had come out just in time to see Cody pull Julia into his arms. I couldn't believe my eyes, this could not be happening. When he leant in to kiss her, I forced myself to walk away quickly. I stormed out of the hotel and took up a wild run. Bullets For My Valentine blasted out of my Ipod and I kept running until the endorphins had cleared my mind and the tears on my face had been replaced with a slight layer of sweat and my decision was final, I would fight for her 'till the end.

* * *

**Like? Don't like? Why? Rate or review please? *on my knees begging* Please? I love this chapter myself, I wanna know what you guys think!**

**_MagdileanaO, _did you like the explanation of Mike's turnaround? Is it believable enough?**


	20. Lost in the past

**A/N: a pretty fast update and I think the next one will be up even faster, I hope later this weekend, monday at the latest. **

**This is a chapter that needs to happen and I don't think it turned out as good as I wanted to. I wrote it a long time ago and I just don't know how to make it better. But I promise, the good stuff will happen after this. I've found a new muse, who is absolutely amazing. I have no idea who he is, since he hides all the time, but I have the feeling it is Jericho, the best in the world at what he does. I love that muse, makes me write things I have to cry about.**

**Thanks to****_ lknights91, BellaDaydream, VolcomStoneBabe, GreyLionDiva, Mrs Scarlett and Legacychick _****for reviewing the last chapter. I really appreciate it. You rock! Now gimme more :p**

**I own no-one, not even my muses! But I keep wondering if it's legal to marry the Miz-muse. I heard a man in Germany married his cat, sure that means I can marry a muse?**

******Legacychick is making me a banner: I owe you big time. For this and for lending me your muses, even if they often get lost on the way back (or end up in jail for robbing a booze-shop).**  


**Chapter 20: Lost in the past**

Cody

It was good to spend some time at home. Since I was on the road more than 200 days a year, the chance to be home for a few weeks was amazing. I really owed Randy for persuading Vince to give me this time off.

I tried to get Julia out of my head for now and to enjoy the time I could spend with my family. That would have been easier if Julia wouldn't be the first thing I thought about in the morning and the last thing I thought about at night. Some of the time I even dreamt about her.

When I finally gave up trying not to think about her, I found myself staring at pictures of her all the time. I looked at them so much that I saw her image every time I closed my eyes. She was so beautiful, with her long red hair, intense blue eyes, her soft creamy skin with a few freckles on her cute nose, her very kissable pink lips... and man, I hadn't even mentioned her body. She was everything I wanted in a woman. She was a real woman, soft and curvy. Even after all these months I still had the mental image in my head of how she had looked naked, trembling under my touch, her eyes dark with lust. I remembered how it felt to touch her, the feeling of her hands on my skin, her taste, her scent, the sound of her voice begging me to continue, the way she looked when I send her over the edge.

The photo I liked the most was taken over a year ago. It was taken in a club, back when we were only flirting, before this entire mess started. I was hugging her from behind, whispering something in her ear which made her laugh. I don't remember what I had said to her, but judging by the look in both of our eyes, it was something dirty. We both looked so happy here. I had realized looking at this and other pictures that I had been in love with her even then.

Hell, I realized now that I probably fell in love with her the first moment I saw her. I still remembered that exact moment. I was talking with Ted and Randy in a hotel lobby, when Ted nudged me. "Look at her. That girl is hot! A girl like that could make me forget that I'm married. I love red heads."

She was walking towards us with one of the senior directors. I could see she was nervous. She looked real vulnerable and cute and so, so beautiful. I couldn't stop staring. I barely heard anything of the conversation, drinking in the sight of her. I know it sounds cheesy, but for me the world stopped that first time I looked in her eyes. I only snapped out of it when Randy smacked me on the back of my head.

"Meet Julia, Cody. Be nice to her, she'll be traveling with us for the next few weeks." Randy had immediately taken a liking to her and acted as her older brother already. He warned me off, knowing my reputation with women. I had heeded his warning and for six months we only flirted. I knew she wanted more, I knew it would've cost me no trouble at all to get her into bed, but somehow I managed to restrain myself.

For the first time I realized that I kept my distance to protect myself. I had loved her since that first moment, but I didn't want to know that. I had been protecting myself and seeing where I was right now, that had been a very sound strategy. I never wanted to commit. I had always kept myself from falling in love. That was probably why I hadn't tried anything sooner; knowing that the first time I kissed her it would bring those feelings to the surface, sucking me into the relationship I was trying to avoid.

The problem was that in those months when she was working at Smackdown, I missed her like hell. I even got out my habit of sleeping with every woman I could. I didn't feel like it anymore. By the time she called me to tell me that she was back, I hadn't had sex for weeks. Adding that to actually having her in my hotel room, it was no wonder I couldn't control myself anymore, especially because I could see how hot she was for me. That night had been amazing. I realized now I had acted way too cocky, giving her my usual attitude towards women. It must have made her insecure and led her into trying to play it cool. That combined with my commitment issues, made me act like an ass the next night. No wonder she tried to hurt me back.

Understanding this made me lose my final piece of anger towards her. I forgave her for everything that had happened. But still, the idea of really being with her, to be in a relationship with a girl I loved this much, scared me to death. Losing her would nearly kill me, but loving her hadn't brought me anything better. I just imagined all the ways she could hurt me in the future. How broken I would be if things didn't work out. On the other hand, I didn't know how I would ever get over her.

For days my thoughts went in circles, so I finally talked about this with my sister, Kristin. To be honest, she cornered me one night, marching into my house and bullying me into telling the whole story. She looked sad when I was done. "Codes, why do you have so much trouble letting people in?"

I just shook my head. "I don't know. I just want to do things my own way I guess."

Kristin sighed. "It's more than that Cody. You never talk to anyone. There are so few people who manage to get close to you. This is the first time you said anything about why you came home. I don't think you would even have talked to me if I hadn't forced you."

I was annoyed. I knew very well that she was right, but didn't want to admit it. I shrugged and tried to walk away. I should have known my sister wouldn't let me do that. She just followed me and kept bugging me about it. She wanted me to talk to mom, to find out if anything happened when I was a kid. I had no other choice than to do it, because I knew Kristin would talk to mom for me if I didn't do it myself. Still it wasn't anything I looked forward to, so I delayed it as long as I could. But, I finally realized I wasn't getting any further on my own. Well, that and the fact that Kristin hadn't left me alone since I talked to her.

One afternoon a few days before I had to go back on the road, when I knew my father was away, I finally went to my parent's house, finding my mom in the kitchen. She had a worried expression on her face and she hugged me tightly.

"So," I said a little annoyed. "I take it Kristin has already talked to you."

"Don't be angry with her Cody. She loves you and she really wants to help you." Mom started to make me tea. I felt like I was twelve again and I had come home from a lost wrestling match or a failed exam. Mom always made me feel sheltered. A huge part of my life it had been just us, with Dad on the road and Kristin already in college. "It hurt me to see you so depressed the last few months. You have that from me you know, I know how you feel." Mom looked really sad now.

"Mom," I sighed, "Kristin thinks something might have happened as a kid and that's why I don't want to let people in."

She slowly sat down, "I can only think of one thing that might have had so much influence on you. I always hoped that it didn't leave any scars, but I should have known better." She sighed. "Do you remember Izzy?"

I shook my head, but for a second I saw a little blond girl with two braids grinning at me. I also felt sad and lost suddenly. "I don't know... maybe?" I looked at my mother waiting for an explanation.

"She was the daughter of a good friend of mine. You were almost the same age and you practically grew up together. You did everything together from when you were six months old. There was a time that both of you cried when it was time to go to your own house to sleep. We always joked that the two of you would marry for sure." Mom smiled sadly telling me this.

"What happened? Why don't I remember her? Did she move away?"

Mom shook her head, tears dripping from her eyes. "When you were about four years old, we left you for a moment to play in the front yard. Her mother and I were talking about something personal and we didn't pay close enough attention. You two were playing with a ball. It rolled on the road. Izzy went to get it, and got hit by a car. She died immediately. You ran after her and were the first to see her. You couldn't stop screaming. You hardly slept for months. When you did sleep you had terrible nightmares. Every morning you asked me when Izzy would come back from heaven to play with you. After a few weeks the questions changed. You asked why she didn't want to play with you anymore. You didn't understand why she would leave you like that."

Mom was quiet now. She sipped her tea and looked at the table. Then she grabbed my hand, "I'm afraid that dad and I didn't know how to react to you. We didn't know how to help you. When you stopped talking about it and started sleeping better I thought you had forgotten about it. You never mentioned her anymore. We should have paid closer attention, maybe gotten some help for you, but I was really broken about it too. It happened right under our noses. I lost my best friend too. Izzy's mother moved away soon after the funeral. I felt so alone, with your father away all the time.

I got depressed right then, blaming myself. I couldn't give you what you needed. You must have noticed that I didn't want to talk about Izzy, so you stopped asking. I always felt guilty about that, but didn't know if I should bring it up. It hurt me to see that you never got close to someone. You had friends, but never a best friend again. I still hoped that things would change when you grew up. I was really glad when you met Ted. I think he is the first one who really knows you."

I was silent for a while after my mom stopped talking. I stared at the wall and ripped at a napkin. "I still have those nightmares, you know? I never really remember them, but sometimes I wake up screaming and with a feeling like I lost the most important thing in my life."

We talked for the entire afternoon. My mother showed me old photos I had never seen before. On almost every picture it was me and her. I couldn't believe I had forgotten about this. I mourned the little girl that could have been the most important person in my life now. I felt sad for the little boy that had lost his best friend. It also felt good to finally understand some things about myself. But still I didn't know how it would help me to let Julia in. For me it was clear that was what I wanted, but I didn't know if I could.

* * *

**Like? Don't like? Why? Rate or review please? *on my knees begging* Please? **


	21. Roof top

**A/N: I promised a pretty quick update and here it is. It's pretty short, but it just felt complete like this. **

**The Mike-POV is added after the chapter was already beta-read, so that part isn't beta-ed. I added it because some people requested in their reviews to know how Mike would react on seeing Cody kiss Julia. So I really like to know what you think about it. Was it believable? Did it add anything? Would the chapter been better without that POV?**

**So as you all can see, reviews are greatly appreciated. They make me think about upcoming chapters and add or rewrite things. So if you have an opinion, any at all, please share it with me. I want to know what a chapter does for you, when you think certain things don't sound right, when something makes you laugh or even cry, or when things are annoying. I also really like to know what you want to happen and what you think will happen. **

**I really want to thank all of you who do take the time to review, even if it's not every chapter. Special t****hanks to**_ Marcibelle, __.Eden, lknights91, GreyLionDiva, and Legacychick _**for reviewing the last one. I really appreciate it. You rock! Now gimme more :p**

******Legacychick has made me a banner! I love it! You like too? Go to my profile and check it out. **

******That pic of Mike... I haven't stopped staring at it since Legacychick found it. I know I'm way too old to obsess about famous guys like this... but I just can't help it. I have one excuse, i didn't do it when i was fifteen and all my friends were obsessing about Bon Jovi or Brat Pitt, so I think I'm entitled to a little obsessing right now. I'll grow out of it...**

**DISCLAIMER: I own no-one, not even my muses! **

Julia:

I couldn't sleep, again I might add. Next to me, Mike lay snoring peacefully. At least _he_ was snoring softly. On the other side of the twin bed Jack snored a hell of a lot louder. I didn't really understand how the guy didn't wake himself up from all the noise he was making.

We had spent the night in Mike's room watching movies, just the three of us, since Jack and Sarah were still fighting. Neither of them wanted to tell me what all the fuss was about and after asking them both and asking Evan and Mike, I had given up. I didn't have the energy to deal with their crap as well. As far as I was concerned this had nothing to do with me and they'd better keep me out of it. No way was I picking sides when my best friends were fighting.

I entangled myself from Mike's arms to get up and go to the bathroom. There I lowered myself on the edge of the bath and I rested my hands in my head. I was too tired to even cry. Cody had been gone for only 3 days, and he would be away for more than three weeks. I didn't know exactly when he was coming back, because I didn't want to feel like a prisoner counting away the days. I didn't want to be pathetic and I didn't want to be that girl who couldn't live without the guy. I was a strong, independent woman, with a great life and great friends, though honestly I didn't understand why they even put up with me. Right now I wanted to prove to myself that it wouldn't be the end of the world if Cody didn't want me after all. I wanted to be sure that I would survive. But, no matter what my intentions were, I wasn't doing such a great job. I hadn't slept since I last talked to him, at least not that I was aware of. Another thing I hadn't done very much was eat. Everything I ate tasted like cardboard. No, I wasn't doing all that well.

* * *

Mike:

I woke up from an extremely loud snore of Jack. I reached beside me to pull Julia back into my arms, but the spot next to me was empty. That meant she couldn't sleep again. I was getting really worried about her. She had barely slept for the last few days, not since Cody had left, not since I'd seen Cody fucking kiss her. I didn't get it. If they'd made up, why was she so depressed? And if they hadn't, why had he kissed her? She acted like that asshole had broken her heart, but she didn't cry; she didn't talk; she only stared in the distance.

I had hoped that a night with the three of us and some ridiculous horror movies would cheer her up a little, but I doubted if she'd even noticed what movies we had watched. All night she had stared straight ahead like a zombie, that was if zombies could look this beautiful, this sad. She barely reacted when Jack or I spoke, and whenever she smiled, it seemed fake. Her mood was getting us down as well, and as for me, more than a little bit angry. I was furious at Cody for destroying her like this.

I had wanted to force her to talk, but Jack thought she'd talk when she was ready. She always did. He was right about that, and that was exactly the thing what was worrying me so much. Jules always talked. She wasn't the kind of person to suffer in silence; she always found someone to talk to, to be comforted by or to help her to figure out what she needed to do.

But this time, she had talked to no-one; not to me, not to Jack, not to Randy and not to Sarah. Everybody was worried sick and no-one knew. No-one knew what had happened between her and Cody as well. Not Julia's friends and not Cody's; I had even asked Ted, but he didn't even know that they had talked, he only knew that Julia had been looking for Cody. I looked like I was the one who knew the most of it, and I knew next to nothing. And what I knew, I wish I didn't. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw him kissing her.

I got out of bed and starting dressing. I was going to find out tonight. I was going to make her talk; I needed to know, for me as well as for her.

* * *

Julia

I didn't know how long I had been sitting there when I finally decided to get back to bed. I might not have been sleeping, but in Mike's arms it was at least warm and comfortable. He had been acting a little tense the last few days, but every time I asked, he denied that anything was wrong. He was obviously lying. I hung my head. I was worried about him and even more worries was the last thing I could handle. When I entered the room, Mike was sitting on the edge of the bed. He stood up when he saw me come out and walked up to me.

"Having trouble sleeping again?" Slowly he pushed a strand of hair behind my ear. I nodded, a sad smile crossed my face.

"Come on, put some clothes on, we're gonna take a walk." I looked at him with eyes big with surprise, but when I saw he already had a sweatpants and a hoodie on, I quickly obeyed. It wasn't like I would sleep anyway. When I was dressed, he took my hand and pulled me along through the hotel. He didn't tell me where we were going; in fact he didn't speak at all. It felt like I was dreaming. He stopped when we reached a fire escape. He checked it then pushed it open.

"Mike, we can't… that's…" I stuttered.

"When did you start caring about the rules, gorgeous? Don't worry, I've done this before." I shook my head and followed him through the door. "The pool's closed for the night, but this exit is always open. We went late-night swimming here last year."

I looked around with my eyes wide open. He had led me up to the rooftop. The kidney-shaped pool glistened in the moonlight, the potted palms dark shadows towered over the sun beds. And the view… the view was indescribable. The hotel was the largest building in the area, so I could see miles in every direction. I felt free and peaceful up here and I resisted the urge to joke or speak to prevent myself from breaking the spell. I put my hands on the railing as I leant down to look at the people hurrying along far below me. Mike hugged me from behind and leant his chin on my shoulder.

"Like it?" he whispered. I only nodded, feeling the rough stubble on his cheek against mine. Not for the first time I cursed Cody and the way he made me feel. Not that there was any chance that Mike would still want me. Not after how I had treated him. Tears formed in my eyes and streaked my face. The aching spot in my chest that had been there for the last few days, that I had tried so hard to forget, to ignore, to resist, finally pooled over in this peaceful environment, in the arms of the man I trusted more than anyone on this earth, in the arms of the man I wanted nothing more than to love as he deserved to be loved.

Mike pulled me close against him as I cried, but otherwise he was quiet. He allowed me to sob until the worse of the pressure that had built up inside me was gone and he felt me relax again.

His voice was soft and sad in my ear, "I'm sorry Jules. I haven't been the friend you need. I can see how much you need to talk but didn't want to hurt me. I love you for that, do you know that Jules? But it's killing you and I can't allow that. So talk Jules, talk and I will listen." His words were like a caress and I braced myself to stop another onslaught of tears. I bit my lip so hard it hurt; I didn't want to start crying all over again. But his next words allowed me to let the tears all out again, "If you need to cry, cry. It's just you and me here, nothing to be ashamed of, no reason to hold back. It's not healthy for you to hold back your emotions, Jules. You feel way too much to do that."

A few times I started to speak, and everything that came out was sniffles and blabbered words. When that happened, he shushed me and held me tight, until I was finally relaxed enough to speak, "Why can't I stop loving him, Mike? I wanna stop loving him… I feel so helpless, so out of control… What if I'll never stop loving him? What if he doesn't want me and I still can't get over him? I don't want this anymore, Mike."

A few hours later we sat on one of the sun chairs cuddled together in the frisk morning air. I had laid my heart open for Mike, I had told him some of my deepest, darkest secrets, and none of it had made him turn away. On the contrary, tonight he had told me things about himself he had never told me before, things he said he never told anyone before. I saw a side of Mike I had only scratched the surface of before. He showed me a deeply emotional side of him; he talked about his childhood and the pain he suffered because of his parent's divorce, the deep loneliness that came from growing up as an only child, his fear of not being good enough, of no-one liking him, of being rejected. This actually caused him to invent his alter ego, the Miz, which in the start was nothing more than a way to annoy the hell out of people who didn't like him. Tonight we had grown closer than we ever had before and I knew, we both knew, that whatever happened, nothing would break us apart.

"How did you do it Mike? How did you walk through all that crap and still come out this strong?" A chuckle vibrated through his chest. It looked like he was done being serious.

"That's a secret that belongs to the elderly, gorgeous. It comes with age." I turned my head to glare in his direction. The amused smirk around his lips grew into a grin. I bit my lip as I tried to outstare him, but quickly gave up. It's impossible to outstare a wrestler, they actually train for it.

"Stop pissing with me. I'm being serious here," I pricked my finger against his chest and I giggled when I saw him pull a face.

"Haven't we been serious enough for one night? It's time to have some fun again," I pouted at his words, though honestly I liked the idea of having fun after a night this intense, but I also wanted to hear his secret, if there even was one. "I'll make you a deal. I'll tell you, if you go skinny dipping with me," I gasped. That would be fun indeed, but it would also make us cross that line again, and I wasn't so sure that was such a good idea.

"Come on gorgeous, what happened to the fun side of you? A month ago you would've already been naked and in the pool. It's not like I haven't seen you naked before."

"Yeah, and look where that brought us," I mumbled.

"But I'm perfectly happy about where we are, gorgeous," He pulled me close and nuzzled my neck. It quickly became obvious that he had no trouble crossing the line again and that he didn't mind taking the lead this time. "And that's the secret, accepting life as it is, not only the good things, but also the crap it throws at you. And the same goes for accepting yourself, you can't expect to be all perfect. As I see it, perfect people are boring and mostly fake. And you Jules, you're far from perfect and that makes you so much fun. Intense, but oh so amazing. You need to start accepting yourself. Sure, you can be a spoiled, mean, pain-in-the-ass drama queen," I gasped at his words and struggled to get up, but he wouldn't let me and continued his speech like nothing happened, "But so what? You're also smart, sweet, kind, funny, caring, creative, and a hell of a lot more. You let the world and your emotions overwhelm you and run around with you, when it should be the other way around. You can rule the world if you want to, gorgeous, you only need to start doing it." When his words had sunk in, his speech brought tears into my eyes. I hadn't fully captivated yet how well he knew me and understood me.

"So do I need to throw you in the pool with your clothes on or are you going to get naked?"

He stood up and pulled me up after him. His sudden movement made me crash into him and I wasn't convinced it was entirely by accident. His arms tightened around me and he kissed the last tears from my face. His warm lips against my cool skin sent tiny sparks of desire through my body. When I opened my eyes again, the intensity of his bright blue stare touched a cord deep down inside me, but still I hesitated.

"Don't think Jules, there's only right now, nothing else matters, only right now, just us," With those words his lips came crashing down on mine and a second later he flung us both in the pool.

* * *

**Like? Don't like? Why? Review please? *On my knees begging* Please?**


	22. Can't You Be Mine?

**Chapter 22: Can't you be mine?**

"I'm sick of losing, Julia," Jack whined, "and to goddamned Santino of all people."

"You should've thought about that before picking a fight with Sar," Jack had a huge scowl on his face and I had to agree with him. The current storyline was doing nothing for his career. It was more like a comedy act.

"It's so unfair. Just because I'm not screwing one of the writers, I'm getting all the shitty storylines." I patted him on the arm, meanwhile pulling a face at Evan who was almost pissing himself with laughter.

"Come on Jack; remember when DX were feuding with Hornswoggle? They didn't complain." Well, that wasn't exactly true, but that was something that stayed behind closed doors.

"They didn't have to wrestle him time after time. Anyway, I wasn't talking about DX, I was talking about me. Can't you talk to Sarah for me?"

"I already tried Jack. She denies that your fight had anything to do with your current storyline," I answered him, not that I had believed Sar. She had a mean streak when she wanted to.

"What?" Evan blurted out. Both Jack and I turned to look at Evan who was now blushing a bright shade of red and innocently looking the other way. Jack raised an eyebrow and Evan shrugged, "I'm staying out of this. But if I can give you one piece of advice; apologize. You don't have to mean it, but it will make your life so much easier. Believe me, you don't want to know about the other ideas she has." Jack pulled a face at his words.

"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK," Jack cursed, "I can't believe I'm actually considering apologizing when I've done nothing wrong. I just want another writer. Don't you have a cute co-worker I can come to an arrangement with?"

I mentally went over my co-workers, but couldn't think of anyone who quite lived up to his standards, "I don't think so, though Simon seems to have quite a crush on you," Evan and I doubled in laughter when we saw the disgust on Jack's face. "Come on Jack. He's quite pretty, even if it's a guy, why not give it a try?"

"Hmm… let's think… No!" At least Jack was smiling again.

"Well, I'll tell you this. We have job interviews next week. I'll pick you someone nice and hot. What do you want, blond or brunette?"

"Latino, please, or maybe Asian." He checked out Eve and Gail Kim as they walked by.

I giggled, "I'll see what I can do. Now guys, let's go over the show. I hope you've already read the script."

We walked through the hotel lobby, talking about the show that night. I was reading the script while I walked, when I bumped into someone. I nearly fell down, only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. I looked up and before I had time to think about it, I hugged him tight.

"Cody, you're back!" We both grinned widely. "You look amazing." He did, he looked happy and rested and carefree. I wished I could say the same about myself. I knew I looked like shit.

"You look tired Julia. Are you doing ok?" He had a worried look on his face when he looked at me and he stroked a strand of hair behind my ear.

I just shrugged; I didn't want to tell him that I had barely slept for the past few weeks. Not now, not here, at least. "It's just real busy."

He nodded. "I just got my schedule. It's crazy. I don't think I have more than ten minutes of free time the entire week. There's barely time to sleep." He slowly let me go. "We really need to talk, but I just don't know when."

I smiled sadly. "I know; we'll talk later this week. Right now, you need to make sure you know what you have to do tonight. Did you get the script for tonight?" Not knowing what else to do, I snapped back into being professional.

Cody nodded. "I already read it on the plane, it's amazing. It will shock a lot of people. I will look for Ted and Randy to rehearse." He started to walk away then turned around, giving me one more hug. "I missed you," he whispered in my ear and quickly walked away.

I just stood there watching his back as he walked away. What the hell did all of this mean? I felt an arm around my waist, hugging me. "He looks good, don't you think?" Jack said to me. "I really think you are gonna be ok. Otherwise I'll kill him, because I can't stand it if you leave." I sighed, a lump in my throat forming. I _was_ already looking out for other jobs. I didn't know if I could cope with having Cody around me, if he told me he didn't want me. I would need space to get over him, and that would probably mean leaving. I hated feeling this helpless over a guy. I wasn't ready to give up this life yet, I didn't want to leave my friends, to give up the traveling, or everything I could still learn here.

Cody had been right, the schedule was crazy. I barely saw him that week. I barely had the time to talk to anyone. There were a lot of signings, talk show invites and requests for interviews. The writers were expected to sort all this out, making sure the right superstars and diva's got their spotlight. Apart from that, I had so much writing, so much reading to do in preparation for some fully packed days at headquarters next week that I was locked in my room most of the time.

Still, I didn't complain. The energy was amazing, everyone picked up a step. Every night the crowd went crazy and the main advantage was that I didn't have time to think about anything. At least not during the day, during the night I had plenty of time, since I still barely slept. With Cody back, my stress level had risen even higher and I was too tense to even lie still. After an uncomfortable night spent with Mike and an even more horrible night spent alone, I persuaded my friends to go out with me. It took a lot of convincing, because everybody was exhausted, so in the end it was just Jack, Mike and I, which was the best scenario possible. It being just the three of us meant I could completely let go and not worry about what everyone would think about it.

* * *

The music was pumping through the club. It was just the sort of club I liked. The beats were so loud I could feel them deep inside my body. The music was too loud to allow any conversation. This was the sort of place you came to dance and that was just what I was planning to do all night. As expected, neither Jack nor Mike were very eager to dance. Jack did dance, when he had a sufficient amount of alcohol in his veins that is, but I had never gotten Mike as far as dancing in public, which was a shame, since he had very nice moves. I didn't try to talk him into it though; I had a plan.

The moment I had my drink, I made my way onto the dance floor, scanning the crowd for an appropriate dance partner. I started moving my hips and moved in sync with the music. The strobe lights flared and formed the illusion of the world fading into slow motion.

Every time the lights flashed on, I met Mike's eyes which were intensively staring at me. His eyes didn't leave me for a second. He must have been the only person in the club not moving. The only movement he made was when he lifted his bottle of beer to his mouth. Every move I made was meant for him and the smirk on his face bore witness that he knew this was the case. This would be an enormous battle of wills, but I had an entire crowd of horny men and a dress to kill for to help me with that problem.

It didn't take long before I felt two hands on my hips and a body pressing against me. I didn't care to look at the guy. It didn't matter what he looked like, the only thing that mattered was that he could dance and that his move brought a scowl to Mike's face, but this still wasn't enough to make him come for me. His scowl was replaced by another smirk as he must have realized what I was trying to do. Now a scowl formed on my own face. He was going to make this difficult for me.

But soon a second guy joined in the dance. The guy was cute, but that was about it. Once again I realized how much being around wrestlers had spoiled me for the rest of the world. He was just too… small for me. I liked my guys well muscled and though I never was into huge guys like Cena or Batista, this guy was just too damn skinny. But then again, he knew what he was doing and I was having loads of fun with them. Unfortunately I lost my view of Mike, but hell, I was sure he was still watching me.

Still, I danced to another two songs, in which the guys became bolder in grinding against me, before someone grabbed my hand and pulled me away from them. A quick glance upwards convinced me, this was indeed the guy I had been waiting for all night. The two guys I had been dancing with, thought about protesting, but Mike sure looked huge next to them. I almost never realized this, because most of the other wrestlers were a lot bigger. But Mike was big... big and gorgeous as hell. I turned to face him, the other guys already forgotten.

He leant forward to shout something in my ear, "You have your wish granted, gorgeous. I'll dance with you tonight. But you'd better enjoy it, because this is a onetime thing."

* * *

Mike

This club wasn't my scene and I didn't care for this music, but I must admit it was intoxicating. Soon I wasn't aware of anything but the beats pumping through me and the girl dancing in front of me. We were in a world of our own as we moved as one. My hands were steady on her hips, her hands traveling my chest as she moved in front of me. She was turning me on big time.

It didn't happen very often when it was just us out in public, and I wondered how far she would let me go. Or even better, if I could get her to take the initiative again. Cody was back, so my time was running out. I didn't think she had already made up her mind. After our talk on the rooftop, I realized that she might love Cody, but that didn't mean she wanted to be with him, she just felt she didn't have a choice. I'd offered her the alternative on a golden platter, and tonight I would find out if she would take it. I wanted my answer and I'd much prefer it if I didn't have to pull it out of her. I wasn't going to resort to begging.

I moved around her, so her back was against my chest. She immediately pushed against me, rubbing me with the movement of her body. I might get used to this dancing thing after all, it was freaking hot. I looked around the club seeing a lot of eyes focused on us. I wondered if anyone had recognized me, or if it was just the show we were putting on.

She pulled my head towards me to shout in my ear, "All the women here wish they were me. Fuck Mike, you look like you belong on the dance floor."

I didn't care to reply, I just nuzzled her neck, softly kissing and nibbling it. I moved my hands along her side, grazing her breasts and back to her hips. Her reaction was to push a little harder against me. Fuck, so freaking hot. I never was one for the quick fuck in the bathroom, but the way she rubbed against me, made me understand those who did.

"I'm starting to understand this dancing thing," I said several songs later, my lips on her ear, "It's like foreplay."

She turned around, throwing her arms around my neck, pressing her entire body against me, her movement in perfect sync with the music, the sway of her hips perfectly fitting the beats, perfectly following the moves of mine. "It's sexy huh?"

Her huge smile dared me to take the next step. I cocked my head, inching closer; she tilted her head, leaning in. Our lips brushed together softly, slowly moving against each other. We melted together for a lingering, sensual kiss that seemed to go on for hours, still moving to the music, not caring about the crowd of people surrounding us.

"That was looking pretty hot out there," Jack said with a huge grin on his face. He had abandoned the girl he had been flirting with when he saw me making my way to the bar. I didn't answer, I just grinned.

"I always thought she was just playing with you, but now I'm not so sure… the way she keeps looking at you, I think she's falling for you." Again, I just grinned, taking a sip of my beer. That was exactly what I was thinking.

"But Cody's back. What are you gonna do about that?"

"I'm gonna make her choose, but not tonight… tonight I'm gonna take her to heaven." Satisfied, I took another sip of my beer, almost choking on it with laughter, when I saw the look of disgust on his face.

"Too much information man… I have to get back to my woman. I have my own trip to heaven to make. Don't wait for me, I'll get back to the hotel on my own, but not alone." Still grinning, he walked back to the girl that had been staring at him the entire time he had been talking to me. I almost felt sorry for her, Jack always chose girls that were young and pretty naive. She wouldn't know what hit her when he threw her out of the hotel room the next morning.

I watched Jules making her way back to me through the crowd. She was still moving to the beat, a bright smile on her face while she sang along with the music. This was one girl that would always stand out in any crowd. A lot of eyes followed her every move and a few guys tried to make a move, which she elegantly avoided. Meeting my eyes, her smile grew even bigger and her moves a little sexier. I pushed myself away from the bar and slowly walked towards her, meanwhile enjoying the show she was giving away and not at all minding the attention the other guys were giving her. There was only one guy I was jealous of, and he wasn't here, so tonight nobody could stop me from taking her home.

I reached out my hand and she eagerly took it. I grinned at the jealous faces around me when I pulled her into my arms, crashing my lips against hers. "Are you ready to go home, gorgeous?"

"Not yet," A cute pout formed on her lips, "I wanna dance with you some more. You might never do it again." She traced her lips across my jaw. "Please? I'm so gonna make it worth it later." With her words I felt something stirring in my pants. She hadn't need to beg, I would do anything to make her happy, but a promise like that... yeah; I really liked this dancing thing.

* * *

The cab ride back to the hotel had been pretty decent. There was a time for heated backseat groping and this wasn't it. We would be going slow and intense; this wasn't a girl I wanted to fuck, I needed to make love to her. So I chatted with the driver, while lazily, but oh so deliberately, stroking her thigh. The way she was practically purring in my ear told me I was already getting her places.

Still she hesitated when we were in my hotel room. She bit her lip, seemingly insecure. I decided to give her some room and softly kissed her lips and went into the bathroom. A few minutes later she followed me there. "Mike, don't you think… I think…" she looked to the floor, then met my eyes again, "We need to talk..."

I put my finger on her lips to stop her from talking, "Not tonight Jules, let's not ruin a perfect night… we'll talk tomorrow, okay?" Not giving her the time to change her mind after she gave the smallest nod, I replaced my fingers with my lips and let our bodies do the talking.

* * *

Julia

Last night Mike had made the choice more difficult than it had ever been before. Last night had been perfect, every minute of it had been perfect. Every second I spent with him made me fall harder for him, but still, it wasn't enough to make me forget about Cody. My heart was literally being ripped apart between these two men. I loved them both and having to choose between them literally hurt me. My entire body ached, my stomach was a boiling pit of pain. And it had to be my choice; I didn't want to let this depend on what Cody had decided. I didn't want to be that coward.

Last night, before we had gone out, I had decided I needed to tell Mike that I still wanted Cody; I didn't want to give Mike false hope. But everything he said, everything he did, the way he looked at me, the way he touched me, the way he made love to me over and over again, had made me doubt once again.

I sat in my room, surrounded by the tons of papers I needed to read. At the moment I had a stack of job applications before me for the job interviews we would do on Tuesday. Next to me lay a stack of scripts I needed to read before the meetings on Wednesday and I still needed to finish my final proposal for the storyline... and I couldn't concentrate on any of it.

Instead I lay on my bed and I listened to depressing love songs, each and every one of them breaking my heart, tears rolling across my face. More than anything I wanted to turn back the clock to before any of this had happened, more than anything I wanted to be able to stop everything that had happened between me and Cody. I sobbed into my pillow, feeling alone and helpless and small. The choice I had to make was too cruel, too painful. Nothing about this was rational, nothing about this made sense in any way.

What I wanted was Mike; I wanted him to make me happy like only he could do; I wanted him at my side with everything I did. He was the guy I laughed with, cried with, the guy who understood me better than anyone else could ever do. I wanted him to make me feel sheltered and loved and I wanted to make him happy in return.

But Cody… oh my God, I needed Cody. Without him I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't breathe. Everything hurt without him; I needed him to love me back; I needed him to save me; I _needed_ him.

* * *

I sat in my room on my bed, trying to find the courage to go and talk to Mike. I had avoided him all night, instead hanging with Randy and Sarah. For once my two friends didn't pass judgment; for once they didn't tell me what to do. Tonight they had just listened, eyes sad as they witnessed my pain, Randy occasionally hugging me close.

A soft knock interrupted my thoughts and tears started to pool in my eyes when I saw who was at the door. "Come in Mike, I was just on my way to see you." He studied my expression and I could see the pain building in his eyes.

"Mike…" He didn't even let me finish my first sentence. He pulled me tight against him, his arms circling my back, clamping me to him, his face buried in my hair.

"Don't do it Jules…," his voice was strained, "Please don't do this… I didn't want to beg, but I don't care about anything anymore. I will make you forget about him… you will forget him in time, I promise. Let me make you happy… make me happy… please." He shook from his sobs, and I sobbed in his shirt. His pain hurt me so bad, I wanted this man so bad, but I couldn't, I knew I couldn't. What I felt for him was too much, but not nearly enough, "Please… you need to pick me, please pick me, choose me, please Jules… I need you to love me, too." His words broke my heart over and over again. I hadn't realized before how much he felt for me. I was falling apart again. This man… he could've been… he _should've_ been… the one. On some level I hated Cody for doing this to me, for making me do this to Mike.

Minutes later he let me go and started pacing though the room, tears still streaming across his face. I stared at him, trying to calm down enough to speak. Suddenly he slumped down until he sat against the wall, his face hidden in his hands. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what to say, I felt powerless. Quietly I sat down next to him, and softly touched his arm. Mike had taken my pain away so many times; I wished I could do the same for him now. But it was my fault he felt like this, my fault he was falling down in pieces. When he felt my hand on his arm, he turned his head to look at me and pulled me close against him.

"Why, Jules?" he spoke quietly, "Why can't I be enough for you? Why don't you love me?"

I doubled from the physical pain his words caused. For a few seconds I couldn't breathe, my heart missed a few beats; it was really breaking now. How could I ever make this better, when I couldn't tell him what he wanted to hear? "I'm so sorry, if I had a choice, I'd choose you, Mike. Never think you're not good enough for me; you're everything I wished for, everything I dreamed about and so much more than I deserve," I said as tears streamed across my face once more. More than anything I wanted to tell him how much I loved him, but I didn't want to make it any more difficult for him. I wanted him to be able to move on.

"You are everything to me," I sighed, "But without Cody…" His fingers covering my lips, stopping me from continuing.

"Don't speak Jules… please stop explaining… don't tell me because it hurts. Fuck, it hurts so much." He met my eyes again, I felt like I could see his every emotion, his every thought... so much pain, so desperate, so much love, so warm. I hoped my eyes were as open as his, that he could see the things I couldn't explain to him.

"I'm sorry Mike," I couldn't think what else to say. There wasn't any more to say. I reached out to hug him, but he shrugged me off and a second later he was standing. He stared down on me, not only sad now, anger was building in his eyes.

"You're making a huge mistake Jules. You know that as well as I do. Don't expect me to wait for you, don't expect me to pick up the pieces."

Before I could say that I didn't, he was gone, slamming the door behind him.


	23. I wish I could fly

**A/N: So next chapter. I must say, I was kinda disappointed in the reviews. I only got two for the last chapter. This makes me think you did not like it very much. And that while I was kinda proud on it. I want to thank LegacyChick for reviewing and mostly BellaDaydream for having the guts to tell me what you didn't like. So I changed the ending of the last chap. They didn't sleep together, after Julia told Mike she chose Cody, but he stormed out. Anyway please let me know what you think about this one, even if you hate it!**

******DISCLAIMER: I obviously own no-one, except my muses. Honestly I only truly own my Jeri-muse (who has absolutely nothing to do with this story , but he is the best in the world at what he does and he will hate me if I didn't mention him) and I borrowed (okay, okay, I confess; I stole him) the Miz-muse from LegacyChick. All other muses are hers and I can borrow them if she can miss them. **

**Chapter 23 - I wish I could fly**

Cody

"I'm going crazy," I complained to Ted and Randy as we drove from a signing to an interview. "Every time I have a minute to myself and I try to find Julia to talk to her, someone corners me into doing something else. Not that there's really the time to have the talk that's necessary, but we could at least put our schedules together to find some time."

"Just call her," Randy threw his phone into my lap. "Maybe you'll both have some time tomorrow morning. Your flight doesn't leave until 13.00."

I sighed. "I have an interview at 11.00 and I really need to train before that. I haven't had the time for a decent workout all week." I shook my head. "I don't want to do this over the phone. I'll just try to find her tonight after the show."

I could see Randy glaring at me in the rearview mirror. "You better not hurt that girl again, Cody."

"Stay out of it Randy, I don't think it is any of your business."

Randy looked furious and swung the car towards the side of the road and then stood on the brakes, causing the car to go into a slip. The car screeched into a halt.

"Randy are you crazy?" Ted screamed, "Get out the car and let me drive now! I'm sick of nearly getting killed every time you get behind the wheel."

Randy ignored Ted, turning around and glaring at me. "So it isn't any of my business, huh? Who is the one who has to pick up the pieces every time you break her heart? I'm sick of seeing how you destroy her time after time. Since the beginning you've done nothing else but lead her on. I really don't know what's wrong with you. What more can you want in a woman? You need to drop your act and grow up fast."

I was so angry I didn't want to react to him. I was afraid I would hit him if this went on a little longer. I tried to leave the car, but Randy had locked the doors. So I had no choice but to let my anger out.

"What's wrong with me, Randy? I would like to know what's wrong with you! I's not like I wanted this to happen. It hasn't been exactly Christmas for me this year. But it's nice to know how you think about me. I thought you were my friend. You don't understand anything about me and you certainly don't understand anything about me and Julia. So yes, I want you to keep out of this. Now let me out of the car, I'll get a cab."

"Don't Cody," Ted pleaded. He hated arguments. "Randy didn't mean it like that." He glared at Randy. "At least I hope so."

"I certainly meant every word I said. It was time someone said it." Randy was still furious and had a stubborn look on his face. I thought he was the one who was acting like a child now. I wanted to tell him this, but Ted was faster.

"Randy you're acting like an idiot." Ted snapped. "You don't even have any idea what Cody has decided about Julia. He's right, this is something between them. You can't expect him to tell you before he has even talked to her. I don't understand what comes over you when it concerns her. You act like a raging bull every time you think someone will do her wrong. Apologize or get out the car yourself!"

I listened to this open mouthed. This was a side of the usually placid Ted I had never seen before. I felt warm by this defense by my best friend. He really understood me. The expression on Randy's face was almost funny. It changed from bewilderment, to anger, to shame, to anger again. He glared at both of us, then left the car.

Ted shrugged. He was calm once again. "A walk will cool him down. Randy does not like to be wrong." He switched to the driver's seat; I climbed over the front seat so I could sit next to him. I already decided that I wouldn't be the one who would apologize this time.

* * *

After my match that night I raced through the stadium looking for her. I didn't even take the time to take a shower or get dressed. I just wanted to speak to her now. I could only hope she hadn't left already. I finally found her, getting in a car with Jack, ready to leave for the hotel. "Julia," I called her name, hoping she would hear me. I thanked God that it was Jack and not Mike she was with.

I stormed towards her, screaming and waving. I must have looked like an idiot, running through the garage in my wrestling gear. Finally she seemed to hear me and got out off the car. She started to walk towards me, Jack stayed behind in the car, unusually considerate for once. I slowed down, panting and grabbing my ribs.

"Is something wrong Cody?" She bit her lip, eyes large with panic. "Is Randy hurt? Or Ted?"

I shook my head, still trying to catch my breath. "I just really wanted to talk to you before we both left again."

"Why didn't you call me? You didn't need to go through all this trouble. You must be freezing."

"Not freezing… hot…" I still panted. "I wanted to see you; I didn't want you to get away. Please tell me you don't fly tonight."

"No, I fly at eight in the morning, so I have to leave at six. I wanted to try and get some sleep tonight." Now she said it, she looked exhausted. She had bags under her eyes and she was pale as death. She radiated nothing of her usual energy, nothing of her usual happiness. I hoped it wasn't all because of me.

"Oh, okay," I sighed, my shoulders hunching. "You look tired, you need to sleep. I want you to take care of yourself. I just hoped we could talk."

Her eyes brightened and for the first time she smiled. And I smiled back at her when I heard her answer. "No it's fine. I really want to talk to you too. I can sleep on the plane tomorrow. Why don't you get showered and dressed and meet me in the hotel later? I'm in room 2.16." I looked at her when she got into the car.

Just before they left, Jack opened the window, gave me a thumbs up and handed me a sweater.

* * *

Julia

I was exhausted; there wasn't any other word for it. Jack had to practically drag me up to my hotel room. In there I slumped down on my bed and closed my eyes. Jack lay down next to me.

"You can't go on Julia. You need to sleep. Call Cody, you can talk another time."

"No," I slowly shook my head, "No matter how tired I am, my head is running haywire. I can't sleep now, not until I speak to Cody. After that… I don't know…" I sighed, tearing up again. Jack pulled me close against him. "Have you seen Mike today?"

I could feel him nod, "This afternoon before he left. I won't lie to you, he looked terrible. I'm glad they believed him when he called in sick and could have that early flight. It might've been Raw tonight but no way could he have pulled off a match today. Not in the state he was in. You broke his heart, Julia." I nodded, crying quietly. "You love him, don't you?" Jack asked softly.

Again I nodded. "A lot… and still it's nothing like I feel for Cody."

"Love is a mess, isn't it?" Jack murmured. He couldn't be more right. He sat up and pulled me up after him. "If I were you I'd take a quick shower. That might make you feel a little better. Cody won't be here for at least another half an hour." I slowly nodded, he had a point, "Look after yourself girl, and call me if you need me later on. Anytime, I don't care what time it is." I hugged him tight before he left my room. Jack was a great friend, but he didn't make me feel safe as only Mike could.

By the time Cody finally knocked on my door, I was beside myself with nerves. I had repeated so many possible scenarios in my head that I was going crazy. I trembled when I opened the door to let him in. The warmth in his eyes as he kissed me on my cheek made me feel a tiny bit better.

"Look, do you want to take a walk?" Cody asked me, looking almost as nervous as I was. "I think it's easier to talk outside."

I nodded and went to get my coat. We walked silently through the hotel, both of us watching the other from the corners of our eyes, not knowing what to say.

Outside I noticed that it was storming. The weather matched my mood perfectly. I leaned my head back, enjoying the feeling of the wind pulling my hair.

"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't realize the weather was this bad. Let's go back inside."

I just shook my head, took his hand and pulled him along. "I love storms, they make me feel alive."

* * *

Cody

I could only smile when I saw her standing in the dark, her hair floating in the wind; arms spread wide, eyes bright and a huge smile on her face. She had never looked more beautiful. I chuckled, "Now I understand why they burned red haired woman back in the middle ages; if they acted anything like you, that is. You look like you could fly away any moment."

"Sometime I wish I could," She said softly. "Just lift off and go where ever I want. Leave everything behind."

I took her hand and pulled her close. "Please don't do that, beautiful. I don't think I'm a very good flyer." She looked up at me. I could see the insecurity in her eyes. They must have matched mine. "Julia, please tell me how you're doing. I've asked Jack but he's kinda evasive." I was really worried about her. I hadn't liked one bit of the answers that Jack had given me and the accusation made by Randy that I was destroying her still rang in my ears.

She was silent for a while, looking at the ground. When she finally met my eyes, I cringed from the pain inside. "I don't know what you want to hear? I can tell you I'm fine, that I'm just stressed out."

I shook my head. "I want you to tell me the truth."

She sighed, thought for a moment and then looked at the ground. "I'm a mess, Cody. I can't describe it any other way. I don't sleep, I can hardly eat. I'm terrified. I have no control. It feels like you hold my heart in your hands and that I'm just waiting for you to crush it."

I was shocked to hear this. It hurt me to hear how much she suffered and knowing that I had caused her to feel this. I also understood Randy's anger a little bit better. Although I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and kiss her pain away, I needed to explain how I felt about things. I pulled her close for a moment. I could feel how tense she was.

"Look," I let her go again and put my hands in my pocket as we started to walk. "I've done a lot of soul searching the last few weeks and I wanted to say I'm sorry for what I said to you the last time we talked."

She made a small sound; I don't think she understood what I meant. "I said to you that I didn't know if you were good for me, that you almost destroyed me. But it's not like that, I see that now." I shook my head, not knowing how to explain it.

"I understand why you said those things to me, Julia, why you tried to hurt me. I kinda deserved it and you couldn't have known how much your words would affect me, you couldn't know how much I cared for you. How could you? I didn't even know that myself.

"What am I saying? I didn't even want to know that I loved you. It wasn't your fault that you could hurt me that much, that you have that kind of power over me." I shook my head. "But it scares me to death that you have.

"I've got major commitment issues. I never wanted people close, never gave them the chance... and then I met you." I looked at her, gave her a small smile and then looked at the ground again. "The first time I looked into those beautiful eyes of yours, I was lost. You immediately breached all my walls, coming closer than I ever wanted anyone.

"So I kept my distance, kept things casual and denied what I felt for you. Until that night, when I held you in my arms, I could very well imagine doing that for the rest of my life. So I panicked," I grinned, looking at her, "The rest you know."

Julia suddenly stopped walking and grabbed my hands. I could see her thinking, going over everything I said, trying to figure out which question was the most important.

"Why don't you want people close? What happened? Was it your dad being away that much?"

I shook my head. "My mom thinks it's because I lost my best friend when I was very young." I told her about Izzy. Julia had tears in her eyes when I was finished.

She pulled me into a hug. "That's so sad. I'm so sorry for you, Cody."

"It's ok, Julia, I hardly remember. I didn't remember anything before my mom told me. I just had nightmares sometimes. But it's good to know I'm not plain crazy." I smirked at that. I wiped the tears from her face. "Come on beautiful, don't cry, I can't bear to see you this sad. It makes me wanna cry too." I pulled her close again and kissed the top of her head.

She leaned against me, relaxing for a moment. "Cody? What does this mean for us?"

I sighed, pushing her back, so I could look into her eyes again. "I don't really know. I've been trying to figure that out for weeks. I want you to understand how much I love you. The problem is that I love you so much that I can't handle it. It scares me to death."

She nodded. "I know; it's all been so intense between us. The last six or seven months everything was difficult and strained. Every time we talked, we both got hurt. I can't take that anymore. It's destroying me," She sounded soft and tired. "Do you think we can work things out? Do you even want to Cody?" There were tears in her eyes again as she leaned her head against my chest.

"Hey?" I bent my head to whisper in her ear. "I'm sure we'll make it work. I can't stand to think anything else. But we have to turn things around. Look at me, Julia. Tell me what you think."

* * *

Julia

I felt hope hearing these words and met his eyes again, "I just want us to be together. But you don't think we can?" He shook his head and I felt all my hope disappear again. "Then what _do_ you want, Cody?"

"I think we should take it slow."

It felt like a blow to my stomach. "You mean be friends?" My voice trembled and I tried very hard to hold back my tears.

"No!" He shook his head furiously. "No, not friends. To be honest, I don't even think we can be friends. I think we should date."

That was so unexpected, my mouth fell open. "You think we should… _date_?"

Cody nodded. "You know, it's like this. You and I, we have some sort of crazy soulmate thing going on. I never believed in that, but I don't have another way to explain it. We have all these feelings and there has been so much pain and I think that if we would be together right now, we would probably get in a fight about nothing and break up. I don't think we would stand a chance."

He looked at me to see if I followed him. I did; I nodded and I waited for him to continue.

"The stupid thing is that I want nothing more than to be with you, but the thought scares me senseless. I just can't take that now. There's no way that will work. I think we only have a chance if we slow things down, get to know each other a little bit better and have some fun again."

He smiled at me. "So, what do you think, do you want to go on a date with me?" He looked a little insecure now he had said everything he wanted.

"Fun?" I grinned at him. "That sounds good. We used to be pretty good at that."

He grinned back, happy that I understood him. "Yeah, let's date." I hugged him. "So where are you going to take me on our first date?" I looked into his laughing eyes and I really wanted to kiss him.

He must have seen that in my eyes, because he bent his head towards me to meet my lips.

Suddenly he pulled back and chuckled. "This isn't really taking it slow, is it? No beautiful, no kissing before the first date."

I pouted. "I don't like that rule. But okay, if you want me to play hard to get, I can do that." I smirked. "I've had a lot of practice at that with Jack."

He looked curious. "Did you ever sleep with him?"

"I don't think that is any of your business." I smiled sweetly and the look in his eyes changed to intense jealousy. I didn't want to leave this hanging between us, so I decided to answer his question. "No, Cody, nothing ever happened. I was tempted a few times. Jack can be very persistent when he wants something. But in the end, he's just my friend, nothing more."

Cody grinned now, but the jealousy remained in his eyes. "I will kick his ass if he ever tries anything with you again. Please tell me nothing happened between you and Mike either. Jack I might be able to handle, but you and Mike?" Cody shook his head. "You know that he's in love with you, don't you?"

I nodded, trying to hold back my tears as I was remembered of last night. "I know he is, Cody, but that's something I can't change. Mike's my best friend and he knows how much I love you. I need him, Cody, but I don't feel for him what I feel for you." I felt a stab for avoiding his question, I felt like I was lying to him. But explaining everything to Cody would destroy any chance we might have had to be together. He already said it; he wouldn't be able to handle what happened between me and Mike. He definitely wouldn't understand the way I felt about Mike. I could only hope that Cody would never find out about Mike and me.

I punched him on his arm. "You haven't told me what our first date will be. Have you even thought about it?" I needed to get him off the subject of Mike. Luckily he took the bait.

"Yeah, I did plan something, actually. I kinda hoped you would say yes, so I already arranged for us to have a day off together. Since we are in Florida next week, I wanna take you to Disneyland." He looked insecure now. "I hope you like that? It sounds a little childish now I say it. We can do something else if you want?"

"Disneyland?" I smiled broadly. "Cool, I haven't been there since I was ten. I love roller coasters."

His smile matched mine. "Good, we will go this Friday okay? I have to be back for the show that night, but we have all day. But now, beautiful, I'm gonna bring you back to the hotel, because you have to be up in four hours and I want you to get some sleep. You look like you need it."

"Cody?" The entire walk to my hotel room I had to try to find the courage to ask this. "Normally I never ask this before a first date, but since it's us, I really need to know. This dating, do you want us to be exclusive? Or do you want us to date other people too?"

He stood really close now, his eyes intense and almost angry as he spoke these words. "I can't stand the idea of you being with another man. I can hardly take it that you spend so much time with Mike or Jack, though I believe you if you say nothing ever happened. I hate them for being so close to you. I want to kill them for wanting you, for thinking the things about you that I know they must be thinking. So no! I definitely don't want you to date other men. Yes, I want us to be exclusive. But I can't stop you if you want otherwise."

I softly stroked his cheek to calm him down. It felt really good to hear his words. "Calm down, Codes. No need to get angry. I don't want to date anyone else. I was just afraid you wanted to. To be honest, I can't stand the thought of you even looking at other women. I want you to be mine."

He smiled, visibly relaxing when he heard my words. "Don't worry girl, I don't see anyone but you. There's not enough room in my head or heart." He kissed me on the cheek. "Goodnight, Julia. I'll call you tomorrow."

* * *

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	24. What friends are for

**A/N: Ok, it's good that I have some chaps ready for this one, 'cause I got completely distracted by writing slash. Right now I'm writing a JeriMiz story (Dirty Little Secret) and a joint fic with LegacyChick (Sex, Drugs and Real Love). The last one contains about everyone we love and some we really hate and A) The most fun I ever had writing B) a lot better than anything I've written on my own. So if you like a little bit of slash, AND don't mind things like bad language, violence, sex, drugs, etc. check it out. **

**I wanna thank **_LegacyChick, YouCantSeeMe.x, miamitravel, MagdileanaO, hardycenagrl, VolcomStoneBabe, BellaDaydream, xoxoMarieDiBiasexoxo_** for reviewing the last chapter. I love you all. Right now I'm in that kind of mood that I hate everything I write/wrote so I really appreciate some reviews about this chapter.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own no-one, only some of my muses. I only own my Mike-muse, my Jericho-muse (the best in the world at what he does), my Carlito-muse (anyone want him? he's up for adoption), my Regal-muse (I got myself a butler) and co-own the Swagger-muse. I also had a Evan-muse and a Dolph-muse but already gave them away. **

Chapter 24 - What friends are for...

We didn't speak to each other until the day of our date. He did try to call me, but got my voicemail since I was still in the air. When I tried to call him back, he was on a plane. The next few days I was in meetings most of the time and to complicate things even more we were in different time zones. I was so tired that whenever I wasn't working, I was sleeping. So, instead of a real conversation, we talked to each other's voicemails and we texted a lot.

I felt really nervous about our date. It would be the first time we would spend an entire day together and I realized a lot depended on how this day would go. We had agreed to meet for a drink the night before. I really hoped that this would take some of the tension away. But his plane had been delayed, so he texted me to say that he would pick me up the following morning instead.

Instead, I spend the night hanging out with Randy, who I met in the hotel bar. Since I had told Sarah everything about me and Cody and I had texted Jack to give him the headlines I had assumed that Cody would have told his friends as well. I was surprised and a little insecure when I found out Randy knew nothing.

"Look Julia, I had a fight with Cody. We're not speaking right now," he said, looking uncomfortable. "You look pretty happy, so I'm afraid I owe Cody an apology."

I raised my eyebrow at him, "Please don't tell me that the fight was about me? Again I might add…" Randy looked away, the guilt on his face was obvious.

"So it was," I sighed, "Why do you keep doing this, Randy?" I put my hand on his. "It's not that I don't appreciate you standing up for me, but I don't want to come between you and Cody every time."

"I don't know what it is Julia." His blue eyes met mine, the emotion in them unreadable. "But when I think that someone's going to hurt you, I snap. Cody has hurt you so bad this year. I won't allow him to destroy you and I certainly don't want you to leave. I know I should stay out of it, but you mean way too much to me."

The look in his eyes was so intense now that I couldn't break the gaze. His hands were on my upper arms. I had no idea what he was trying to tell me and I wasn't so sure I wanted to know. I swallowed; I needed to get this conversation on safer ground.

I might have dreamt about a moment like this in the past, but that was before I even met him, when he was only a secret fantasy, before he was one of my closest friends and not to mention a close friend of the man I loved. Things like this weren't supposed to happen in real life. I knew I had to put a stop to this, but I was still captivated by him. He lifted a hand to caress my face.

"You are so beautiful Julia. I wonder if you understand the effect you have on me. If things would have been different…" He was silent for a minute, still staring into my eyes. "You're such an amazing woman. If I had only met you earlier, but now… I know we can't, we shouldn't, but still… I can't stop myself from wondering, from dreaming…" I swallowed, my heart hammered in my chest; was he saying what I thought he was saying?

He continued, "I asked myself, what's the thing about you that has inspired such love in Cody that he would give up everything for you? But now, I see it." He shook his head, "But I wish I didn't… Cody is an idiot if he lets you get away." Mentioning Cody seemed to help him collect himself. He sighed, leaned away from me and finally broke eye contact.

I realized I had been holding my breath and exhaled slowly. I didn't know what to think of this. Things with Cody were complicated enough without Randy adding this kind of confusion into the mix.

To make things even worse, I noticed Ted on the other side of the room, staring at us with an unhappy expression on his face. I waved at him, but he just walked away. I cringed at the thought of how things probably had looked just a minute ago. I had to talk to Ted. I wouldn't let Randy come between me and Cody. Randy might have been a secret fantasy a long time ago, but Cody was the man I loved.

I stood up. "I'll talk to you later Randy," I said to him, without even looking at him.

I quickly ran after Ted. I looked around the lobby and saw Ted entering the elevator. I dove in after him. I startled him for a moment. Luckily we were the only ones in the elevator.

His expression was angry as he stared down on me, "How long has this been going on? I must say, it explains a lot. But how can you do that to Cody?" he asked with a hard edge to his voice.

I was confused. "What do you mean by that, Ted?"

Ted smirked. "Do you think I didn't see you two lovebirds acting all cosy? I'm not stupid you know."

I cringed. "I know how that must have looked, but I swear to you, nothing is going on between me and Randy."

"It didn't look like nothing to me. Quit the lying Julia. Stop thinking about yourself for a moment and think about Cody. Think about Randy's wife, his kid."

I nearly exploded with anger. I stopped thinking and hit the emergency stop button. The lift came to a sudden halt.

"What? Are you crazy?" He screamed at me, "Get it going again! I wanna get out!"

"I am not crazy and I am not lying. I only want you to listen to me. Randy and I were just talking. Or to phrase it all a little more accurately, Randy was talking and I was listening, although I wish I hadn't been."

I suddenly felt tired and slumped down on the floor, tears in my eyes. "And whether you believe it or not, I want Cody, no-one else. I don't need Randy, or anyone else, to mess that up," I glared up at Ted.

Ted sat down next to me. I could see he didn't believe me, but at least he was listening.

"But that look in your eyes. It didn't look like nothing," He still sounded angry.

I sighed. "I won't lie to you Ted. I'm attracted to Randy, but it's not like you think it is. When he had just started wrestling and I was about 16 or 17 years old, it had been his posters that hung above my bed. He was the guy I dreamt about marrying, I completely idolized him. I had a huge crush on him, even when I grew older. Can you believe that I cried when I heard he got married? I fantasized about meeting him and him ditching his wife for me in an instant." Ted smiled, amused at my confession, probably realizing there must be 16-year old girls thinking the same things about him now.

"But that was a long time ago. When I got the job with WWE, I realized that I had to grow up and get over it. I had expected to develop a huge crush on him anyway, but instead I met Cody. I barely noticed Randy; or you for that matter, that day I met the three of you. I only saw Cody." I smiled to myself now. "I do still feel attracted to Randy, but it's only a physical thing and I would never, ever do anything with that, even if it had nothing to do with Cody. He's married, Ted, and that's a line I won't cross. I need you to believe me when I say how much I love Cody and that I don't want to be with Randy," I begged him, my eyes pleading.

He slowly nodded. "But what was going on between you in the bar?"

I shook my head. "I don't really know. I don't want to read too much into it. But it looked like he confessed he has feelings for me. I don't know what he wants from me. I just need him to be my friend. He is the one who always takes care of me... but I'm not in love with him. He isn't Cody. What you saw was just my old schoolgirl crush playing up. As for Randy? I don't know what he wants, and I don't want to know. He has to figure that out for himself. It has nothing to do with me."

Ted looked like he had a headache. He held his head in his hands. "What the hell? Why are things always so complicated with you and Cody? I believe you, but I still think Cody needs to know. I don't think I can keep something like this to myself. You need to tell him."

I started to cry, "I'm so afraid I'm going to ruin things between us. It's all so fragile. Telling him and not telling him may both prove to be the end of us. But you're right. Not telling him might be even worse. I just don't know how or when. It would be best if Randy talked to him. Can't you talk to Randy, please?" I hugged my knees, laying my head in my arms.

Ted put his hand on my back for a moment to comfort me. "I'll think about it. Cody and Randy need to sort things out between them and I don't think they can do that without my help, so I need to talk to Randy anyway. I'll see what I can do. Don't worry about it now ok? Just worry about your date tomorrow. I know Cody is really looking forward to it."

He stood up, helped me up and pushed the button. He seemed relieved when the elevator started moving again.

"Thank God," He said. "Don't tell anyone, but I think I'm claustrophobic. Please never trap me in an elevator again."

I was still crying as I walked through the hallway. Ted had been right; I needed to be honest with Cody, no matter what the consequences were going to be. He had a right to know what happened, even if it would break us up again. The main problem was that I wasn't so sure that Ted had really believed that nothing was going on between me and Randy. Damn it, why had Randy sprung this on me? He was the last person I expected this from. He was one of the few guys who had kept faithful to his wife... at least that was what I had thought.

"Asshole," I spat out, getting angrier by the second.

"Excuse me?" I sprung when I heard a voice right next to me. Blushing fiercely, I didn't want to look in his direction; I didn't want to show him my tears.

"Sorry, I was just talking to myself." I was walking away again, when a hand curled around my arm, pulling me back, turning me around. A finger was put under my chin to lift my face,

"Fuck, Jules, what has happened to you this time? And why are you running away from me?" I looked up into the concerned eyes of my best friend. I couldn't resist stroking his face as I saw how terrible he looked. I couldn't help crying even harder when I saw the pain on his face.

"I don't expect you to be here for me now. I have to learn to stand on my own two feet someday, right?" I tried to sound tough, to keep my distance, but the tears that still fell from my eyes ruined that look.

He sighed, biting his lip, closing his eyes for a moment, his shoulders hunching, "Aren't we friends anymore? Damn it, Jules, I need you in my life; even if it's not the way I wanted you to be in it. Or… don't you want me in your life?" His insecure blue eyes stared into mine, begging, bracing himself for another blow.

"Of course we're still friends, of course I need you in my life. Nothing can change that… no-one will change that… ever… I just… after last week… I wanted to give you space…"

A slow smile formed around his lips. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. He pulled me close for a tight hug, and in his arms I felt comfortable and secure and safe and incredible guilty. I didn't deserve a friend like this.

"So you'd better tell me what happened. Come in, my room is right here."

He didn't wait for my answer, but opened his door and walked in, expecting me to follow him. I felt really uncomfortable, being alone with him like this. In the past, even before we slept together, we always cuddled up together. That was something that had to change, even if I didn't really want it to. I needed to give him the space to get over me, and I needed the space to do the same thing. I couldn't have it all; I couldn't spend my entire life both Mike's arms _and_ Cody's, though in a perfect world I would. He must've felt the same way, because he pulled out a chair and sat on it the wrong way round, his arms leaning on the back of the chair. I sat down on the bed, uncomfortable with the distance between us, but I had to get used to this.

He rubbed his neck, looking at a spot behind my head. It took a while before he spoke, "So you and Cody…?"

I looked at my hands, "We're gonna date… take things slow…." I peeked at his face, a flash of pain visible, before he met my eyes with a fake grin.

"Is there any change you're not exclusive?"

I forced my lips into a smile, before looking at the floor again. I wondered if we would ever be the same again.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'm just trying to cope, you know."

I didn't want to look at him, because I had started to cry again. I could hear him stand up and feel the bed dip when he sat down next to me. We sat like this for a few minutes, not talking, not touching, until he sighed and wrapped his arm around me. I leant into him.

"Don't cry Jules, you don't have to cry for me." Of course, that only made me cry harder.

"So I guess you weren't crying about Cody?" I shook my head. "So, what's wrong?"

"Randy…" I sniffled, "Ted… he thinks… Randy and I… didn't believe me… will tell Cody… Randy said… stupid asshole… he should've shut up… oh… why did he do that to me, Mike?" I looked up to Mike to give me the answers, but he looked bewildered and pulled me close again.

"Calm down Jules… please calm down and tell me what happened, from the start… I've got absolutely no idea what you're talking about."

Fifteen minutes later I sat on his bed, leaning against the headboard with a cup of tea in my hands and Mike sitting cross-legged in front of me. "So let me get this straight, Randy told you he has a crush on you, Ted saw you talking and now he thinks you're having an affair with Randy, and you're afraid Ted will tell Cody and that Cody will believe him?" He rubbed his face, "I really don't want to ask this, but…"

I glared at him, furious again. What did everyone think I was? "Don't, Mike… don't you dare think that… where would I have even found the time to sleep with Randy? I've spent every free minute with you, both day and night… don't you dare think that I would do something like that to you, don't you dare belittle what happened between us."

A look of relief flowed across his face, "Sorry Jules, I'm just seizing up the competition." A real smile formed around his lips and I couldn't help smiling back even though his words hurt me.

I sighed, "Don't Mike, don't joke about that… it's not funny… it's so not funny it hurts."

"I can't help it, Jules. Joking is the way I cope; joking is what makes me feel better. Right now I need Miz to take over. I know that can be annoying, but I need him to keep me standing."

He lay back with his hands under his head and continued almost dreamingly, "Jack warned me about this, you know? He told me you would destroy me, but I told him to shut up, told him you would be worth all the pain. But I never expected it to hurt so much, I never thought you would pick him over me, I thought you loved me too. I'm such an idiot…. I never wanted to fall for you in the first place, I told myself I wouldn't. Friends with benefits, you know? Jack knew I couldn't, he knew I'd fall for you... and boy, when Jacks right, he's really right. That first night, that first night that you fell asleep in my arms, I knew I was lost. I don't blame you Jules. You've been honest the entire time, but still, I thought you'd love me too…. I wanted to rescue you from the villain, be your hero, your knight in shining armor, but I never expected you to make the wrong choice."

Silent tears formed creeks on my face; I didn't know what to say. The only thing I could do was to pull his head in my lap and stroke his hair.

"I'm sorry, Jules. I know I shouldn't tell you this, but you're my best friend, and I need you when I feel like this, even if you're the one who broke my heart. Kinda ironic isn't it?"

I hung my head, the pain in my chest almost too much to bear, but he needed me, he needed me to talk to and he needed me to hold him. So, I would be here as long as he needed me. Countless times before, Mike had put his own pain aside to comfort me and tonight I would do the same thing for him. That's what friends are for. So, I crawled next to him and held him as long as he needed me to.

* * *

**Reviews, please?**


	25. First Date

**A/N: I'm sorry for the late update. I've been completely wrapped up in my slash. The other problem is that I'm starting to fall out of love with this fic, that I have no idea what to do with it and the lack of reviews isn't helping either. It's been two months since I've written something for this thing, I've still got one chap done after this one and after that... I hope I can motivate myself to continue it. I don't think I need to tell you that reviews will help with that. **

**Chapter 25: Like a rollercoaster**

Cody

I was really nervous about our date. Disneyland had seemed like such a good idea, but now I thought an entire day together would be too much, too fast. Dinner and a movie might be unoriginal, but it would have been a lot easier. Not to mention that I didn't feel like being chased by fans the entire day. I hoped sunglasses and a baseball cap would be enough to give us some privacy. I felt like a freaking teenager the way I hesitated in front of her door, so I pulled myself together and knocked.

I didn't have to wait long for Julia to open it up. She looked stunning. I couldn't stop myself from checking her out in a rather obvious way. She wore dark grey shorts which showed a lot of leg and a tank top in the exact same shade of electric blue as her eyes that clung to her body. I loved it how she could look that gorgeous, even when she was dressed casual.

"Hey," I said while kissing her cheek. "I shouldn't have worried about being harassed by fans today. No-one will notice me next to you."

She blushed and looked at me from under her eyelashes. She looked so cute, that I had to stop myself from kissing her. I still didn't want to rush things, but that would ask for a lot of self-control.

"So are you ready to go?"

Julia nodded. "I just have to get my bag." She went to get a backpack.

"What the hell are you bringing along?" I asked curiously. "I told you I would take care of everything. Please don't tell me you think I expect you to carry a heavy bag the entire day."

She just handed me her bag to check it, raising her eyebrow. "You're a man and I've never met one who is practical in things like this."

I grinned. "Don't underestimate me, girl. Don't forget that I'm on the road most of my life. I know how to pack for a trip." I emptied her bag, spreading everything on her bed. I looked at her stuff for a while, then handed her her sunglasses. "I have everything else; it's all in the car." I smirked when she look impressed.

She looked even more impressed when she saw my rental car. I had managed to talk the rental company into giving me a beautiful convertible instead of the usual crap. She walked around it tracing her fingers over the car. I could imagine how her fingers would feel on my skin and I had to restrain myself again.

"Will you let me drive it, Cody? I love fast cars."

How could I say no to that bright smile, so I tossed her the keys. I would never have believed that her smile could get even brighter, but it did. Julia jumped in the car, quickly braiding her long red hair so it wouldn't get in the way and immediately started the engine.

"Come on Codes, let's go. I hope you can read a map," she said with another huge smile.

Ten minutes later it was my turn to be impressed. She was an amazing driver. She beat Ted or Randy at this, that's for sure. I was happy to let her drive the entire way. I could see how much she loved it.

It gave me the chance to relax and to admire the view. By view, I obviously meant the beautiful girl sitting next to me. I softly sang along with the radio. She looked at me, tossed me another bright smile and told me to turn up the volume. Soon we both sang along at the top of our voices. The fact that neither of us could hold a tune didn't ruin the fun.

* * *

Julia

The rest of the day went just as great. We had loads of fun and for the first time in a long time we really talked. I liked the Cody I saw today. I had seen both his sensitive side and the cocky, almost arrogant side of him, but never at the same time. Now it was like the two sides of him had melted together forming a funny, charming, caring guy, with a confidence that made him stand out in a crowd. I felt at ease with him now. I couldn't believe a guy like this could be in love with me.

Although we didn't talk about our feelings for each other today, he still showed me how he felt about me almost the entire time. He touched me a lot; his hand on the small of my back, an arm around my waist, holding my hand when he noticed I was scared on one of the roller coasters.

We had a run in with some fans, but nothing really annoying. He was kind to all of them, convincing them to take a picture of us as a trade for his autograph or a picture with him. The first time someone recognized him he looked a little uncomfortable afterwards, asking me if I minded but I didn't, he was who he was and I loved him for that. Anyway, if we were going to be together I had to get used to it... I had always managed to accept it when I hung out with Mike or Jack.

The day went by too fast. Before we knew it, it was time to go back. I asked Cody to drive back since I was so tired. I fell asleep on the way back. He woke me up with a soft kiss on my lips when we had arrived at the arena. I felt a little embarrassed for sleeping the entire journey. I told him I was sorry.

"No need to be sorry. You looked real cute. I think I can spend all day watching you sleep. And it's obvious that you're exhausted. Didn't you sleep well last night?" He sounded worried.

I tossed him a weak smile. "No, I hardly slept. I was nervous about today and…" I didn't know how to continue. I was afraid to ruin an amazing day, but I had decided to tell him everything before I saw Randy again.

Of course Cody noticed something was wrong. He pulled me into his arms. "Hey? What's the matter, Julie? You can tell me anything."

For a moment I leant against his chest, I loved being this close to him. I really hoped that this wouldn't be the last time I was in his arms. Although Cody and I were on the right path, we were still far from being stable... and this… this might ruin everything. I could think of so many ways how this might turn out bad. If he didn't want to hear me out, if he didn't believe me that I had no real feelings for Randy, if he found out about my earlier infatuation with Randy, if he would just give up on us, because it was too hard. My stomach ached from the stress. I swallowed the lump in my throat and willed my tears away.

Now I pulled back to meet his eyes. "I don't really know how to tell you. I don't want to make too much of it. It hasn't got anything to do with us really, but I can't keep this from you."

He looked a little curious, but I could feel him tense up. I trembled from my nerves. I felt stupid for bringing it up. I should have waited for Ted to talk to Randy. But there was no going back now.

"Yesterday I had a drink with Randy. He was acting really strange and I think he told me he has feelings for me. I'm not really sure. He wasn't really clear, he just hinted at things," I spoke soft now, blushing. It all sounded so stupid and immature now.

Cody looked confused, his eyes guarded. "You're telling me you think Randy's in love with you? And he told you? That fucking bastard! What the hell does he want from you?" His mood had switched from confusion to intense anger and I was glad it wasn't pointed at me. "And what about you, do you have feelings for him?" His eyes bored into mine, trying to get out the truth. He let me go now, taking a step backwards to get some distance between us.

"No, Cody, I don't, I swear. Maybe I shouldn't have told you, but I didn't want to lie to you and I didn't want you to hear it from someone else."

"Who else knows?" He snapped at me and I cringed now that all his anger was directed towards me.

"Just Ted, he saw us last night and he thought there was something going on. I think it might have looked more than it was. Randy held me and I was so amazed by what he said that I couldn't break eye contact or push him away. So I talked to Ted, because I didn't want him to tell you something that wasn't true. But nothing happened between me and Randy, I swear, it just looked more than it was," I was babbling now trying to explain everything at once. I heard my own words and hoped he wouldn't take them the wrong way. I was explaining myself as if I had done something wrong, as if I was trying to lie my way out of this.

Cody turned away from me and he looked down to the floor. He was silent for quite a while. I tried to figure out what to say, what I could do to make him see that this didn't really have anything to do with him and me, that Randy's feelings shouldn't affect anything between us.

"You really feel nothing for him?" he spoke softly, his voice small and insecure and so, so sad, "You don't want him instead of me? Am I your second choice, because Randy is married?"

I couldn't stand to hear how much I hurt him again. I started to think that it might be better for him if I would just disappear from his life. I didn't care that this was not my fault. Cody had been right; I had too much power over him, everything I did affected him so much. So little was needed for him to go from being happy to being broken again.

But that was also true the other way around and there was no escaping this. The way we loved each other was too strong, too powerful, and I didn't know how much more drama between us I would be able to take. But I couldn't live without him, that was a fact. I just hoped it wouldn't end in us not being able to live with each other either.

It looked like Cody's plan to take it slow and have fun again wasn't working out. It might have, if Randy had kept his fucking mouth shut. If he had only acted like the friend I had thought he was, if he would've just kept acting like my brother. Big brothers I could handle, I had loads of them.

I had to make this right; I had to make Cody listen to me, to believe me, to realize I wasn't the one who hurt him now. I took a step towards him again and put my hands on his upper arms. His face slowly turned towards me, but he still didn't meet my eyes. He was crying. Now I was sure we were over. He had decided that it had been enough and he would end it right now. I couldn't stop the tears that started to fall from my eyes too.

"Cody… please listen to me Codes…" He focused his eyes on me now. "You're my only choice. You have been from the moment I met you. Randy is just a friend, at least I thought he was. I don't want him, Cody. Even if he had told me he'd leave Samantha for me, it would not matter. I would still choose you over him, over everyone. I don't even have to think about that."

It was my time to look away now. I waited for the blow, waited for him to say that it didn't matter anymore, that this wouldn't work out. But Cody just hugged me tight, clinging me to him.

"I was so afraid that you would tell me that you wanted him. I was so afraid that you would tell me that you didn't know who to choose."

"I thought you would end things now, no matter what I want. I don't know how we are going to make this work. It's like a freaking roller coaster."

He shook his head resolutely. "I will not allow Randy or anyone else to mess this up. If we can't make it through something like this, we can't make it through anything. And if Orton thinks I will just hand you over to him, he's wrong. You don't have to be afraid July, I don't intend to give up this easy. I don't intend to give up at all."

We were silent for a while, holding each other close. Then he spoke again, "It's good that you told me, thank you for that." He kissed me on the top of my head then rested his head there. I could feel his breath flowing through my hair.

"But I hope you don't mind if I kick Randy's ass," he spoke between clenched teeth, "I can't believe he has tried to come between us."

I just shook my head. "You can do whatever you want."

He slowly released me from his grip. His hands traveled from my back to my face and he played with my hair for a moment. Love blazed from his eyes, the pain in them completely gone. I closed my eyes, savoring the feeling his touch gave me. Suddenly his lips covered mine, for a kiss that was so incredibly soft and tender, it blew my mind away. My eyes flew open for a moment then closed again as this kiss deepened. He laid all his love for me in this kiss and I gave him the same thing back. Everything else disappeared. It could not have been more than minutes, but it felt like hours before we let go again. We were both grinning like idiots. It seemed incredible that just a moment ago I had been sure we were over. Now I felt safe and secure again and truly happy. Roller coaster was a perfect description, but this feeling, this kiss, had just made it all worth it. Not just today, but everything that had happened between us before.

We leaned in to kiss again, but just before our lips met, he pulled back and kissed my forehead instead. I looked at him bewildered. He raised an eyebrow at me and he shook his head.

"One more kiss, and we can forget about taking it slow. I never expected it to be so difficult." He smiled his crooked smile, his eyes filled with love and desire. "You're way too tempting for your own good. No wonder every man in sight falls for you. I shouldn't really blame them."

He checked his watch. "Damn, I need to run. My match is up in half an hour. Will you meet me for a drink afterwards?"

I nodded. "I'll come and find you at your locker room after the show. I don't have to work tonight and I hope I can be in the crowd, if there are some seats left. Give them hell for me!"

He winked. "I'll win this one for you Julia, though I can't really remember if I'm actually supposed to win tonight." He kissed my cheek. "And do me one favor. Please stay away from Randy for now. I still have to figure out what I'm going to do with him."


	26. The big green monster called Jealousy

**A/N: **

**This chapter is so long overdue I feel ashamed. So dear reader and even dearer reviewers I'm sorry. The only reason I have is not being inspired whatsoever for this story. For a while I was thinking about stopping it altogether, but I can't leave it unfinished so I will keep writing it. I will be wrapping it up in the next few chapters, I actually already wrote the last chapter and it was the idea about the ending that finally gave me some inspiration. I hope you all like the direction I'm gonna take it in, and if you don't, well… Tough luck, because I'm gonna do it anyway. **

**This doesn't mean I don't your opinion about it because reviews - especially long reviews that have ideas or questions in them - give me inspiration for this and that means there's less chance of my muses trying to distract me from this and make me write more slash.**

**As you have probably already noticed I don't hold myself to any timeline and I just use the story lines I liked and some I make up and none of them I use in the order they actually happened in. This chapter has DX in it. Why? Because I wrote the first scene somewhere in february when there still was a DX and I was too lazy to change it into a different tag team. I also ignore the draft even though my Jeri-muse is bugging me to write Chris Jericho in it. **

**DISCLAIMER: Not mine, but I want Mike, I want him, I want him, I want him and I want him now *holds breath until I get what I want* **

**In the meanwhile please leave a review while I try to will Mike into my house by sheer will. If he's not on Raw tomorrow I have done it. And no, I won't share him! *evil laugh***

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* * *

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**Chapter 26: The big green monster called Jealousy:**

Cody

I was steaming as I hurried through the arena. How could Randy do that to me? He had to keep his filthy hands off of my girl. I wanted to find him and make him pay. I wanted to make him hurt. For one moment the idea of calling Samantha came into my mind, but I didn't want to take this out on his family. I loved Alanna; she was the sweetest little girl I had ever seen.

Since I was running really late, I had to get revenge out of my head for now. I hoped Randy wouldn't be in the locker room, because I would spring him the moment I saw him. I shouldn't have worried. Ted was the only one in our locker room. He had brought my bag and I quickly changed, telling Ted everything that had happened today. He asked me if he needed to talk to Randy for me, but I told him no. I wanted to beat the crap out of Randy first, and maybe, just maybe we could talk after that. Right now I wanted Randy gone. If I could think of a way to get him fired I would do that without looking back. I was completely done with him.

"Oh Ted," I asked just before we walked through the curtain, "are we scheduled to get a win tonight? I forgot all about the script."

Ted grinned at me. "That's so cute Code, young love is so adorable. How could you forget? We face DX and yes, we'll win."

Ted and I had an amazing match that night. I called up all the anger and frustration I had in me, which made me even more aggressive than I usually was. This also caused me to accidentally knock out Shawn Michaels with a drop-kick that was a little bit too well aimed. It was a good thing that we were supposed to win, because anything else wasn't possible considering the state of mind I was in.

After I had showered and changed, I went to DX's locker room to apologize. Luckily Shawn was alright. I talked to them for a few minutes and when I left the room I ran into Randy.

"Cody, I was looking for you. We need to talk," he said calmly.

I saw red before my eyes. "I think you have said enough Randy. There isn't anything I want to hear from you," I hissed, "but you'd better listen to me; you'll stay away from me and you definitely won't come anywhere near Julia again."

And then I hit him. I hit him with all my strength and I put all my anger behind it. It felt really good. I should have done that ages ago. Randy slumped down on the floor. I had knocked him out. I hoped he had already had his match, otherwise I would be in trouble. I knocked on DX's door again. Shawn opened up.

I pointed at Randy and said, "Can you take care of that for me? I seem to have gotten the habit of knocking people out today. I don't know if he has had his match yet, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered." Shawn looked at me and then at Randy lying on the floor. He opened his mouth to ask me what was going on, but I already started to walk away grinning.

I waved my, now painful, right hand to him. "I have to find someone to take care of this for me. It hurts a little. See you later," I called over my shoulder to a bewildered Shawn and Hunter.

Julia was waiting for me at my locker room. She looked beautiful again, now wearing an amazing green dress. I walked up to her and put my hands on the wall on both sides of her, capturing her between them. I looked at her for a few seconds, silent, then crashed my lips on hers. I was still pumped up with adrenaline and I didn't think, I just acted. She didn't seem to mind. She answered my kiss with the same hunger.

We couldn't break apart. We kept on kissing, standing in the same position, my hands still on the wall at the sides of her face, her hands in my hair pulling me close. Her hands and our lips and tongues were the only parts of our bodies touching. Still, it was the most erotic kiss I had ever shared with anyone. It held a promise for the future. Apart from turning me on, the kiss also calmed me down. This thing between us was the only thing that mattered and it was finally going the way it should. So when I felt the choice between taking her right here right now against this wall, or ending the kiss, I chose the latter and slowly pulled away.

"Hi," she said, smiling sheepishly. Her lips were swollen from our kiss, her eyes radiating love and lust. I loved how I could see every emotion on her face and how I could make her feel that way.

"Hi," I grinned back at her, "Are you ready to go?"

Julia blushed. "I just need a minute to come back to myself. What did I do to deserve that kind of greeting?"

"You being you is enough to make me want to kiss you like that. But being pumped up from hitting Randy helped too." I smirked. I could still feel the impact of my fist against his face.

"You did what?" We both jumped at the sound of Jack's voice behind us. We turned around and I automatically put my arm around Julia's waist to pull her close.

"Sorry for the interruption, guys. I would have said something sooner, but you looked kinda busy. Man, that was one hot kiss." He grinned.

"Jack," Julia blushed, it was so cute. I rested my head on the top of hers, taking in her smell. "How long have you been standing there?"

Jack shrugged. "Just for a minute or so. I came to ask you if you wanted to come clubbing. A group of us are going downtown. But what's going on between you and Randy, Cody? I heard he was completely knocked out right before his match. John Cena had some major improvising to do to fill the time before Randy could make it to the match. Good thing that guy is a genius with a mic in his hands."

I just shrugged, "It's a long story Jack. We'll fill you in later."

* * *

Mike

I tried very hard not to think about what was happening right behind me. Instead I focussed on the whiskey I was pouring into my throat. She chose him and now she was rubbing my nose in their happiness. It made me sick. I made the mistake of looking behind me. She was dancing with him, pushing closely against him. She rested her head against his chest, he leant his head on hers. She was mine to hold like that, mine to dance with. Cody opened his eyes and stared right into mine. He grinned widely and winked at me, he _fucking_ winked at me. I clenched my hand around my glass so tight that I was surprised it didn't break. I turned around again and with one huge sip I emptied my glass. I slammed it back onto the bar and signaled the bartender to pour me another one.

"Are you okay Mike?" Jack asked as he sat down on the stool next to me.

"Do I fucking look okay?" I pulled a face. "Have you seen what they're doing? They're practically dry-fucking on the dance-floor. How do you think I'm doing? And that fucking bastard winked at me; can you believe that he freaking winked at me? I'll kill him, I'm gonna kill him now." I stood up abruptly. I couldn't wait until I had my hands around his scrawny neck; that would wipe the smile off his face for sure. But Jack pushed me back onto my stool.

"Mike, picking a fight won't help you now. You're right, she made her choice. I know you think it's the wrong choice, but we'll just have to see about that. Do you really want to become the pathetic, jealous guy? What happened to being only in it for the fun?"

"That," I said bitterly while I took a large sip of my whiskey, "blew out the window the moment I started sleeping with her. Look at her," I started to turn around, but thought better of that, "Just look at her. She's just… you know… everything. She's my Jules, Jack. She's supposed to be mine, and now he has his dirty hands all over her." I drained my glass again. A few seconds later the bartender put down a new glass in front of me. "Thanks man." I said.

"Don't thank me, mate. Thank that pretty girl over there. She said you looked like you needed cheering up. She also wanted you to know that she'd be happy to help you with that."

I looked in the direction that the bartender was pointing to. On the other side of the bar a beautiful creature smiled at me. Automatically I smiled back and raised my glass. "Thanks," I mouthed.

Jack whistled, "You're getting lucky tonight, Mikey. She's hot."

"Then go for it Jack. I'm not in the mood," I stared down into my glass and twirled the liquid inside.

"Nope, she's not my type. But she's yours, you dig rock chicks and you're crazy if you don't go and do her. That girl just handed you the perfect opportunity to get your mind off things. No better cure for a broken heart than a good fuck," I looked at the girl again. She sat with her eyes closed, singing along with the music. As if she felt my glance on her, she opened her eyes and the look she gave me went right to my crotch. Maybe Jack was right about needing a distraction. My attention snapped back to Jack when he added, "And… don't forget Julia always wants what she can't get." He raised an eyebrow, "Have fun Mikey, I see some girls that desperately need my attention."

The next few minutes I spend alternatively looking down into my glass and studying the girl. She had short, messy, jet-black hair and incredible intense, catlike eyes that stared openly curious into mine when she caught me looking at her. She looked wild and interesting and when I noticed she was wearing a Hollywood Undead tank-top my decision was made. She _was_ just my type of girl and ironically the complete opposite of Jules.

"Hi," I said when I sat down next to her.

"Hello," The girl said as she turned towards me, "I didn't think you would come."

"How could I not?" I chuckled, "Getting pissed on my own isn't really any fun."

"I couldn't agree more." She raised her glass and I touched mine to hers, "Here's to getting pissed together." I took another large sip of my drink and smiled when I looked into her green eyes. I felt better already.

"What are you drinking?" I asked her when I saw her glass was empty.

"Same thing as you," Wow… I couldn't believe I just found a girl with great taste in music and in booze. My luck had turned.

"But," I pointed at her glass, "If that's scotch, why does it have a paper umbrella in it?"

"Because everything tastes better with an umbrella in it," she grinned widely.

"Interesting statement," I signaled the bartender and ordered two more glasses of scotch with umbrellas in them... And the umbrella did improve the taste. It also turned my mood completely and soon we talked like we were old friends. Cat had travelled as a roady with several bands and now she worked as an agent for a record label. She had some crazy tales to tell and she was leading a very interesting life. The girl was almost on the road as much as I was. She was living a dream life and if I wasn't already living my own dream, I would see green of envy.

As the night went on, we were sitting closer and closer until she practically sat in my lap, my arm had settled around her waist a long time ago, and the flirty remarks flew over the bar. Every time she touched me it felt like an electric current ran through my body.

"I wonder," I spoke as I put an umbrella in her hair, "if you'd taste better with an umbrella as well." She smiled and leaned towards me to meet my lips halfway. Man, that girl knew how to kiss; slow and sensual, taking the time to explore, to taste, to suck on my lower lip, turning me on big time, until every thought of Julia was blown out off my head and I could only think about how fast I could get Cat naked and into my bed.

"Let's get outta here," I said. I threw some money on the bar to pay for the drinks.

"Sure," she answered, "Your hotel or mine?" We walked through the crowd, my hand on the small of her back. Jack, who had a blond girl in his arms, raised his thumb. "Mike," Cat asked, "Why is that red head with Cody staring at you and me as if she wants to kill us?"

I turned around to face Cat. "She's the reason I was feeling lousy earlier. But now I don't wanna talk about it, because you're the reason I feel amazing right now." With those words I pulled her in to my arms and kissed her again. Cat made me feel amazing. If Jules was jealous now, all the better. She needed to realize what she had lost. But going home with Cat had nothing to do with Julia, I did this for me.

* * *

Julia

I was having trouble focussing on Cody, instead I was staring at Mike who was getting it on with some emo-chick at the bar. I had what I wanted; I was where I had wanted to be for almost a year, so I should be happy, right? I shouldn't be insanely jealous of the girl in Mike's arms. I should be happy that he was finding a way to distract himself. Men did that. Men who felt bad, got drunk and screwed the first bimbo they met in a bar, while the women sat at home crying and eating family packets of chocolate ice-cream. I couldn't help wondering if Cody had done the same the last few months. Could I ask him? And would he tell me the truth if I did?

"A penny for your thoughts, beautiful," Cody said as he smiled down on me. We sat in a booth in a corner, tired from dancing. We were joined here by Evan and Zack at the moment. He had his arm around me and had been talking with the guys, meanwhile stroking my arm.

"My thoughts are worth a little more than that, mister." My smile felt fake and I hoped I fooled him with it. But as I stared into his eyes, I forgot about everything around me, I only saw him and everything I felt for him flooded me again. I was so happy I thought I would burst. Cody stared back at me, a big smile on his face, his eyes mirroring the same happiness I felt.

"What are you suddenly so happy about?" He murmured.

"Because I'm here with you, I just can't believe this is really happening."

"I know, me neither…" His hand travelled to the back of my head and he pulled me close for a quick kiss. At least it was supposed to be a quick kiss, but that first one led to more and then to another and another, until we were firmly locked together, completely oblivious to the people around us.

"Ouch! What the fuck…?" Cody suddenly let me go and rubbed his head.

Evan lay doubled on his seat, his head on his arms, shaking with laughter, Zack leaned back with a very satisfied grin on his face, juggling with an ice cube. "Told you I could make them stop, Ev?" And to us, "Get a room guys. I'm glad you're having fun again, but I don't have to witness all of it."

I giggled, blushing fiercely, hiding my face against Cody's arm. Cody pulled me close and kissed my temple and said to his friends, "We won't be getting a room, because we're taking it slow."

Zack threw his head back and roared with laughter, "Yeah I can see that," and to Evan, "I'll bet you a fifty that he'll do her tonight."

"You're on, but I think they'll last a little longer. Tomorrow, maybe Sunday."

"Hey," I glared at them, "we're right here guys."

"Oh, sorry Julia," Zack smirked, "we have ladies here, so let me rephrase that, 'I'll bet a fifty that Cody'll_ make sweet sweet __lurve_to her tonight.' That's what chicks call it, isn't it?"

"No wonder I've never seen you with a girl…," I smiled sweetly, batting my eyelids at him, "Anyway I would really appreciate it if you didn't bet on my sex life at all, no matter how you call it."

"What? Are we betting on how long you'll last in that taking-it-slow nonsense?" Sarah put the drinks on the table and sat down next to Evan. "I give it a week, where do I pay up?"

"Hey, it isn't nonsense," Cody finally added something to the conversation.

"It is," Evan replied, "I understand where it comes from, but it has as much chance to last as Jack keeping a vow of abstinence." Yeah, I had some great friends and alcohol made them way too honest. Well, we would prove them all wrong, we would take it slow and we would last.

With that thought I zoned out of the conversation and stared straight ahead, right in time to see Mike kissing his bimbo. I tried to look away, but I couldn't. I couldn't help remembering how it felt to kiss him, and I wondered if he had looked this happy kissing me. Minutes later I still couldn't rip my eyes from them and I saw Mike dragging her out off the bar. Well, wasn't she easy? I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to Sarah, who whispered in my ear, "Quit staring at Mike like that, it's obvious. You've got what you wanted, haven't you?" And with those words she dragged Evan with her to the dance floor.

I wondered if Sarah would ever get over her dislike for Cody. The only ones of my friends who were happy that I was with Cody were Jack and Randy. Well, who knew what Randy really wanted? And Jack would be just as happy if I was with Mike. I closed my eyes, leaning my head against Cody's shoulder. I was suddenly exhausted, as much by my own thoughts as the long day it had been, and the previous nights that I had spent virtually without sleep.

"You're exhausted, Jules. Come on, I'll take you back to the hotel." I opened my eyes to smile at him, feeling grateful. I wanted my bed and truthfully, I wanted Cody in it as well. Not for sex, but just to feel safe in his arms. But we couldn't, taking it slow meant a lot more than not having sex, we needed to be careful not to rush into a relationship.

On the way back to the hotel we were both silent. Cody had his arm around my shoulder and I leant against him. My thoughts were running haywire again. I was worrying about… well… everything. I looked up to Cody; he looked a little worried himself. I hoped he hadn't caught me staring at Mike earlier.

He saw me looking at him and pulled me a little closer; nervously he bit his lip, "Why does Sarah hate me so much?" Well, that was something I hadn't expected. I wasn't even aware he noticed it and I was positively surprised that he cared.

"Same reason Ted hates me."

"Teddy doesn't hate you…" Cody stopped and pulled me into his arms.

"Ted doesn't like me very much either. He didn't before and right now he thinks I'm having an affair with Randy. And he blames me for how depressed you were and he was damn right about that. He thinks I will only hurt you again. Sarah thinks the same way about you, without the affair with Randy I guess, though I think she wouldn't put it beyond you. Basically she thinks you're a jerk." I shrugged, "They'll get over it in time. They're our best friends, so it's their job to butt into our lives… don't worry Codes, we'll prove them wrong."

He still looked strained, "Sarah I can handle. I'll prove to her that I'm worthy of you… anyway, I'm way too cute to resist."

"You sure are," I stood on my toes to kiss his lips. "But quit frowning, you'll get wrinkles and that will ruin the cute look."

But he didn't let me distract me from his troubled thoughts. "It's just… you know, you're so close with Mike. You call him your best friend, too," he sighed, "and I'll never win Mike over… not that I want to, I hate him, you know that…"

"Believe me, he hates you too," I mumbled.

"I'm just afraid that Mike will come between us. I can't stand you spending time with him and I guess it's the same way around. And I can't be around him without wanting to knock him out…"

I bit hard on my lip; this wasn't something I had thought about before. I hadn't considered how difficult it would be to keep them both in my life. "We'll just have to work that out. Listen to me Codes," he looked into my eyes, still frowning, "He won't come between us, I won't let him…but, I won't let you come between me and Mike either. So don't force me to choose between the two of you… I love you, more than I had ever imagined possible… but that would be a choice I couldn't make. I need him Cody; he's the one who kept me standing the last few months. I don't expect you to like him; I won't even ask you to be nice to him… but I'd like to be able to spend time with him without you making it impossible." I shut my mouth; this was not the speech I had wanted to give. It wasn't really a fitting speech for a first date. But it needed to be said, so better now, than worrying about it later. If he couldn't take it, well… that was his problem, Mike had already showed me that we still were friends, and that was after I'd broken his heart.

Cody had completely tensed up while I was talking. He had stepped away from me and his hands were clenched into fists. I could see him thinking very hard. I could not read his expression; it wasn't sad, more like angry. No not angry, he was jealous. At the same moment I realized that, he wrapped his hands into my hair and crashed his lips against mine. He completely blew me away with that kiss and when he pulled away the only way I could keep standing was to grab his collar and hold on for dear life. Cody must've noticed that, because he put his arms around my waist and pulled me close.

His lips went to my ear, "Okay, you can hang out with him if you want to."

I started to nod, but changed my mind, "You can't tell me who I can be friends with, Codes." To take the sting out of my words, I pulled his head towards me for a slow and sweet kiss.

"Hmm… fair enough," he murmured, "But I can tell you not to kiss anyone else, right?"

"Fair enough," I grinned. He pulled me close and we stood like that for a few minutes, until I had to stifle a huge yawn and he pulled me along back to the hotel, up to my room. There I leant against my door, uncertain of what to do. One part of me screamed at me to invite him in and rip his clothes off, the other part screamed 'take it slow' and a third part yawned and didn't care about anything if it could get some sleep.

"So, did you have fun today, beautiful?" he had his hands in his pockets like he was insecure of what to do, too.

"Yeah, I've never had a first date like this."

He rubbed his neck, "I must say I had planned it with a little less drama."

I shrugged, "I guess there'll always be some drama when it's us."

"We'll just have to get used to that then. At least, if you want to go out with me again." I could only smile when I saw the insecure look on his face.

"Hmm… let's see, I might be able to put up with you again."

"Haha, funny…" He cupped my face in his hands, bent down and kissed me real tender, "I'll see you tomorrow, beautiful."

**

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Review! Please! Now! **


	27. Mood swings

**A/N: Another update that is way overdue. Mostly because I thought I posted it already. I found out that I didn't just before I went on vacation, more then three weeks ago, decided to post it when I was on vacation since I was taking my laptop anyway and the stupid thing crashed about 5 minutes after I first pt it on. But here it is, I hope it was worth the wait. I really do. There are two more chapters after this one, that I have already written. They will both be up the next few weeks. After that it's over. I'm sorry. i could've done a million more things with it, but I simply didn't have any inspiration left. I came to that point in the story that I just wanted to kill them all and the thought of having them all die in a plane crash to stop the drama. Don't worry, I didn't (or did I?). **

**Thanks to everyone who had read and reviewed and put it on fav or alert. Please don't stop reviewing just because I'll soon finish it. I live for reviews. Special thanks to my beta-reader tiffyxox, without who this story would've totally sucked.**

**Disclaimer: I own no-one, only my muses. Apparently (I checked wikipedia on copyright) I do own my ideas and my OC, but well... I'd rather have Mike. This is for you birthday boy! Not that you care or will ever read it (hopefully, because that would also make him read all the slash I wrote about him and somehow I have the feeling he won't appreciate it). **

**Also check out my banner on my profile. It's beautiful. My good friend Legacychick made it for me. I love her for that and many other things. **

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* * *

**Julia:

The annoying beeping of my alarm clock woke me up from a deep and dreamless sleep. I had slept well for the first time in ages and still I felt like I hadn't slept at all. It took all my self-control not to slam off the alarm and stay in bed for the entire day. It was only a two hour drive to the next city and I had promised to go shopping with Sarah once we were there.

I almost fell asleep under the shower and again when I couldn't resist falling back on my bed before I got dressed. All in all it took me over an hour to get ready to go. It wasn't just the tiredness that kept me dreaming, it was also the constant memories of my date with Cody. I couldn't get the way he looked at me, the way he touched me or the way he had kissed me out of my head. Little bits of our conversations floated up in my thoughts and everything together made me drift off more than a few times. I hadn't realized how horrible I had felt until I didn't anymore.

When I opened my door to go downstairs, Sarah came bouncing through the hallway, probably to drag me out of bed. She had taken over some of Evan's hyperactivity and constant happiness and that had annoyed me senseless the last few months. But not today, today I was happy myself.

"You missed breakfast, lazy. Evan is waiting downstairs with coffee and a bagel. We need to be quick before he eats it himself."

I grinned and hugged my friend. "Please don't feed him coffee. He's bad enough without it."

Sarah grinned. "Don't you think I don't know that? I love him and all, but sometimes he reminds me of a Duracell bunny."

I covered my ears. "Too much information, Sar."

We looked at each other and collapsed in giggles.

Still giggling, Sarah shook her head. "I didn't mean that and you know it. It's about time that you get your own sex life so you won't be bothered by mine."

"Cody and I are taking it slow," I said with a stubborn look on my face, while I picked up my bags.

"So you're not hiding someone in that room?" The look in her eyes was curious and inquisitive.

I only huffed and marched off with my stuff, forcing her to practically run after me. Cody and I could make this work and we would prove everyone wrong.

In the lobby we found Evan waiting with my breakfast and I eagerly grabbed the coffee out of his hands, almost burning my mouth on it.

"Thanks Ev, this is what I needed."

"No problem. I know how cranky you get without your shot of caffeine," he replied with his usual grin. "You go check out and I'll bring your bags to the car so we can get going. I know Sar can't wait to empty my credit card."

"I don't get cranky; you are unnaturally cheerful all the time. It just isn't healthy. By the way, Sarah isn't the only one planning on emptying your credit card."

Evan didn't take the bait and with an amused grin he took my bags, leaving me no choice but to join the line for checking out. Most of the crew and talent had probably already left, but a few late sleepers remained. Before me Eve and Gail were gossiping about Zack among others. Zack had been trying to persuade Eve to go on a date with him, but she wasn't sure yet. She wanted someone a little more mature, someone a few years older. Gail was giggling and going through several single superstars. When she named Jack, it made me snort. The girls looked back with surprised looks on their pretty faces.

I blushed and quickly explained, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to listen in, but I heard you mentioning Jack and maturity in the same sentence and that just doesn't make sense. I think it will take at least ten years before he's ready for more than a one-night stand."

"Well, I guess you'd know that," Gail replied snippily while turning back again.

We didn't get along very well. I would much rather hang with men than with women, Sarah being one of the few exceptions. I tried to ignore them further on, but Eve's next words made my head spin.

"Well, she has a point. Jack has a different girl every night. Too bad, because he is cute... but you know who I wouldn't mind getting to know a little better?" She didn't wait for Gail to answer that. "Mike... he's really cute and loads of fun. I heard they are thinking about putting me in a storyline with him and Cody."

What? Did they? It made sense. Eve was getting a push right now and being paired with Mike would give her a lot of air time. I had not liked the diva-angle in the feud between Mike and Cody before, but now I did even less. Mike was mine and not some brainless model's. Only he wasn't mine and Eve was anything but stupid. She could just be what he wanted. My good mood magically disappeared and this became even worse when I heard a familiar deep voice next to me.

"Julia? Can I talk to you please?"

I glared up at Randy who had a very noticeable black eye where Cody had knocked him out last night. He looked tired and uncomfortable but I didn't care.

"No! I don't want to talk to you now. I don't know if I ever want to talk to you again."

"Don't act so dramatic, Julia. You know I didn't mean to say those things. It just slipped out. Can't you just accept my apology?"

"No, I can't! I don't care what you didn't mean to do. I care about what you did and that is complicating things between me and Cody again. I can't even describe how pissed I am at you. So leave me alone now!"

Randy shook his head but walked off, sighing deeply. I didn't care that I had hurt him. He was a big boy and he would survive. I glared in the direction of Gail and Eve giggling, throwing sneaky looks in my direction.

Ten minutes later I had finally checked out and I stomped out the lobby. Evan saw my scowl and whispered something in Sarah's ear. I could see her sigh even if I was still about 20 yards away. She was not the only one who was getting sick of my mood swings. At that moment my phone rang and I couldn't help but smile when I answered it.

"Hey!"

"Good morning beautiful, did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, I slept great. I wish I could have stayed in bed all day, but I promised Sarah to help her empty Evan's credit card."

Cody chuckled. "Poor guy. He doesn't stand a chance between the two of you. Well, I'll leave you to it. Ted is whining that we need to get going again."

I giggled when I heard Ted's angry reply in the background.

"Apparently he's not whining. But it sure sounds a lot like it. Anyway I just wanted to say that I had a lot of fun yesterday."

"Me, too."

"Good! I wondered if you wanna go out again tomorrow. I'd love to take you out to dinner, but that's nearly impossible with my schedule right now, so I thought we might make it lunch if you'd like that." The slight nervousness in his voice made me smile even wider. It was so cute.

"Okay." I hit myself for that reply. "I mean, I'd love to go to lunch with you tomorrow. Let's see if we can make it through a date without drama."

He sighed. "No drama... that would be great... will I see you at the show tonight?"

I shrugged, but of course he couldn't see that. "I think so, but I probably won't stay till the end, because I wanna make it an early night. I don't even know how I'm gonna make it through an afternoon of shopping." I giggled. "Who'm I kidding; I'm never too tired to shop."

"You have fun today and I'll look for you tonight. I really have to go now, or Teddy will leave me standing here at this dirty gas station. He's a little hung-over and really, really cranky."

"Bye, Codes."

"Bye, beautiful."

I grinned like an idiot when I hung up and I practically skipped towards Evan and Sarah. Sar shook her head at my - again - changed mood.

"Happy again I see?"

I nodded. "Cody called, we have another date tomorrow."

"Good for you. No more mood swings today, I hope?"

"As long as no-one mentions Randy or Mike I'm fine."

I could see that neither of them really understood, but I didn't care. This was something I didn't want to get into today.

* * *

Mike

I was whistling as I walked to the car where Jack was already waiting for me. Waking up next to Cat this morning had felt terrible wrong and fantastic at the same time. The moment she opened her eyes and turned around to kiss me the wrongness had been gone. It felt easy and was immediately fun again. I couldn't remember a morning waking up next to Jules when it hadn't been drama or became drama very soon.

No matter that she was still my best friend - but no matter how much I loved her, she wasn't good for me. Maybe she had done me a favour choosing Cody over me. It hurt to think that, but it also felt like a relief. Yesterday I had decided to fight for her, to do anything I could to make sure things didn't work out between them, today I only wanted to get over her and move on.

"Morning," I said cheerful as I put my bags into the car.

Jack only grunted in reply. He was pretty pale and even looked slightly green.

"Hung-over, buddy?"

"Dunno... I didn't drink that much, as far as I can remember. Might be food poisoning."

I chuckled, "Trust me; if you can't remember how much you drank, it's the alcohol. I'll drive so you can sleep some more. But do me a favour, if you gotta hurl, warn me in time."

He threw me the car keys and got in groaning. "Look who's cheerful today. I don't get that. No matter how much you drink, you're never hung-over."

"Good genes, my friend, we can't all be awesome."

"Haha... I think someone had fun last night with his rock-chick. Told ya that getting laid cures everything."

"It was sex that got me into trouble in the first place. Although I'll admit, you're right, but it's not only the amazing sex, it's more the reminder that there are women without drama out there."

"So all those ridiculous ideas about stealing Julia from Cody are history now?"

I nodded, "I'm gonna leave them to their own drama. Did you see Randy? I heard that Cody knocked him out last night and surprise, surprise, it had something to do with Jules. No, I'm gonna have fun for a while, get over her and move on."

"Good... we can chase girls together. It will be fun to have you as a partner in crime once again. It's always easier to pick someone up if you scare them off first."

"Really? I always thought it was the other way around. You do that dumb grin of yours and then they come running to me for protection against that big, blonde monster. And of course I'm a champion and you are just that annoying guy that is losing to Santino."

Jack glared at me. "Says the guy who's gonna lose three titles in the next few weeks, the guy that's gonna lose to a 50 year old. I'll just ride this Santino thing out. I'll get my push sooner or later."

"I'll get my title back again and then I'll probably lose it to Cody." I pulled a face. "I'm gonna feud with him over MY title and a diva. Last thing I heard it's gonna be Eve."

"Something I wonder if Vince is psychic." Jack chuckled. "You and Cody and a girl. That sounds familiar. But it could be worse, Eve is hot."

"Yeah, it could be Jillian or Alicia. They are annoying. Eve is fun. Well, as long as it'll end with me having the girl and the title, I'm happy. I probably will cause no matter who Cody's daddy is, Vince likes me more." I grinned happily.

Deciding to leave Cody and Julia to their own drama had cleared my perspective on life already. I felt happy and positive all over again.

* * *

Julia:

"This is great!" I almost jumped up and down with excitement. "When you said lunch, I expected a restaurant, but this is so much better."

We were on a small, deserted beach, bordered by cliffs. The sand was white, the palm trees and the azure blue sea made it look like our personal bounty island.

Cody grinned, amused. "Glad you like it. I was thinking of a way to minimize the drama and it being just us seemed the easiest solution."

"Hmm... in the past we could managed drama on our own pretty good. But that is all in the past, from now on, it's gonna be all happily ever after."

"Let's hope so, Julia. Do you want some champagne?"

I nodded. "Wow... you made a high-class picnic!"

"Well... to be honest I ordered it. I'm not exactly a cook. I might be able to manage a sandwich or mac n' cheese, but when I'm at home I usually go to my mom's for dinner." He blushed. "That sounds so pathetic."

I shook my head. "Not that much, I hate cooking, I don't have the patience. I usually burn it because I get distracted by a book or some idea I need to write down that very minute. Sar mostly cooks, or even better, Evan does when he stays with us."

"Do you like Evan?"

"Yeah, I like him a lot. He's great for her. She can get overly serious sometimes and he brings her fun side out. It's sometimes a little tiresome to be around him. He's so hyper and always happy and I'm more like mood-swing girl."

Cody chuckled. "I know you are. Tell me about your family."

"Hmm... changing the subject now?" I laid down on my stomach, head in my hands and I stared out over the sea. "Well, I've got 3 older brothers. They're all way older than I am. My mother was the career type and when I was young she was only around some weekends. So I was raised by my father and my brothers and the occasional nanny when dad had to go away for work."

"It must have been hard, with your mother being away all the time. I had the same thing with my father."

I shook my head as I looked up to him. "I never really missed her. Things were different when my mother was around. Her expectations were so high; she always told me what not to do and how I should behave, how I should strive for the best and never settle for anything less. My mom mostly left my upbringing to my father, but when she decided to step in the pressure tripled. No wonder I get along with men so much better than with women."

"Are you close to your family?" Cody looked at me with curious eyes.

"My parents are divorced now. I barely speak to my mother, she doesn't really approve of my career choice. She thinks I should've gone into advertising, follow into her footsteps, not take a soft career like writing. 'You'll never be truly independent with an unsure career like that, writing is a nice hobby, but get yourself a real job,' that is the kind of thing she always says. She's a true feminist and never really understood that being happy with what you do is so much more important than making tons of money. But I will show her. I will show her that writing is a true career."

I sat up now and hugged my knees. Cody pulled me close and kissed the top of my head.

"It sounds like you still want her approval."

I sighed. "In a way I do. Most of all I want to show her that she was wrong and I want her to accept me for who I am. I would never be where I am now if it wasn't for her and what she taught me about life. In so many ways I am like her. Maybe that's why we clash so much. And this sounds a lot more dramatically than it is. I only see her twice a year and this is fine by her."

"But she is still your mother."

"She is. What about your family? You are pretty close right?" I didn't really want to think about my mother right now. There were so many conflicting emotions when it came to her. I would tell him about it later, but for now I had shown him quite enough of my craziness.

Cody nodded. "We all live pretty close together and I spend a lot of time with my parents and my sister at the days that I'm at home. My father and Dustin were my heroes growing up. For a time we had no contact with Dustin, because my father was fighting with him, but once they solved that, we grew close again. I wish I could spend some time on the same show as him, maybe feuding or even teaming together."

He paused for a moment, staring ahead. "Even with my father being away all the time and me having a half-brother, we were still a normal family. It's all been pretty stable, not like all the craziness you hear when you talk to other people who had wrestlers as fathers. I'm a real family man and that grew even stronger once Kirsten had children. I love my nephews and I spend as much time with them as possible. This sounds pretty boring, I guess."

I denied this, but it made me think nonetheless. Cody sounded like a guy who craved stability and the way he spoke about his family and later about his hometown Marietta, made it obvious he had no intention to leave there. I knew better than to bring it up right now, but what I knew of Marietta, it was even smaller than Stamford and Stamford was already too small for me. I had grown up in New York City and I had every intention to return there or to Los Angeles where I had gone to college. I tried to put this out of my mind right now; we would solve this when it became a problem. We would encounter a lot more boundaries on our path, that much was certain.


	28. A night out

**C****hapter 28, A night out**

One month later:

I sat with Mike, Randy, Jack and Sarah at the hotel bar. Cody was off watching some ridiculous action movie with Ted, Evan and a few other guys. They had invited me along, but I had refused politely. Excuse me if I enjoy my movies to actually have a plot. Randy was still fighting with Cody, even though the sky had been cleared between us weeks ago when I realized how stupid I had been acting. It was not like Randy would come between me and Cody. To be honest, the only thing that could come between me and Cody was the crush I still had on Mike and the threat of Cody ever discovering what had happened between the two of us.

To my surprise, Mike seemed to be over me already. He joked about it sometimes, when it was just us, but otherwise he kept a distance. Well, unless Cody was around to witness it. At those times he enjoyed hugging and touching me. This seemed to be more to piss off Cody than having anything to do with me. My friend had taken over Jack's habit of screwing around and most nights they were out on the hunt together. He seemed happy, happier even than I was. A better person would be glad for him. But I had never considered myself a particularly good person and I'm not ashamed to say that I was seeing green with jealousy. It hurt me to see how quickly he had gotten over me, when I was having no such luck. It bummed me that I couldn't simply enjoy my life and be happy, like everyone around me could. For some reason I always found something to pine about.

"Earth to Julia?" Randy waved his hand in front of my eyes.

I blinked, confused, and saw that my friends were staring at me. "What?"

Mike sighed. "In case you missed the entire conversation, we're trying to decide what to do tonight. Randy wants to hang here and go to bed early, like what's expected for a guy his age..."

"Just wait, Mikey. Just wait. Thirty in october right?"

"Don't remind me."

"Let's go to a karaoke bar!" I suggested happily.

"What?" Jack shook his head furiously.

"Ow, karaoke... I haven't done that in ages." Mike replied nodding.

"And for a good reason. You can't sing." Jack mumbled, grumbling.

"That never stopped me from doing anything I wanted. Randy? You're in?"

Randy shrugged. "Why not? It's not like anyone can force me to sing."

* * *

Mike

Boy, was he wrong. A few hours later Sarah and Jules had coaxed him on the stage and he was bellowing out 'Hotel California' with the girls as background singers. Unfortunately they had no such luck with Jack. There was no amount of flattering and eyelid batting that would get him to make a fool of himself in public. As he said, he had to make a fool of himself everyday in his still insane storyline and he refused to do so on his day off. In some ways, Jack was a bad sport.

No matter how big the town was that we were in, there were always some co-workers in the same bar you went to. Tonight was no different. The door of the bar opened and Melina and John came in. I waved at them and watched as they made their way through the club. My eyes widened as I saw the girls they met. I wish I had seen them before I made an ass of myself by singing 'pokerface'. I don't think Eve had ever seen me acting normal. We had had some appearances together in preparation of the storyline we would have together and during our last, I had been so caught up in the Miz that I hadn't even let her talk. I pointed them out to Jack.

He just shrugged. "Told you that nothing good can come out of karaoke. This stuff is gonna be all over the internet tomorrow, including the rumours that Randy is cheating on his wife with Julia, Sarah or both."

"What's wrong with you?" This grumpiness was not Jack.

He took a huge sip of his beer, draining his glass. "Nothing, I hate karaoke, this is a horrible place to pick up girls and to make matter worse, I have no beer."

"Well, I can solve that last problem."

When I made my way to the bar, Cody, Evan and Ted entered the bar. Ted and Evan waved at me, Cody gave me a glare. I gave him the same look back and resisted the urge to stick out my tongue. I sighed and sat down on a bar stool. There was no way I would go back there. Not while it still cost me anything I had in me not to punch him in the face. I hated to see them together; I hated how much it cost me to get over her, and most of all I hated to see him kiss her like that, like he had every right. Which of course, he had.

"Hey, Mike," I felt a soft hand on my arm. "Are you doing okay?"

"Hey," I smiled at Eve. "Are you here to make fun of me because of my performance?"

Her smile lightened up the room. "I don't think I have ever laughed that hard. And I like it when a man is confident enough to make himself look like an idiot."

"I'll take that as a compliment. Being an idiot seems to be a bit of a specialty lately." Involuntary I glanced in the direction of Julia sitting on Cody's lap.

"I think that she's the idiot," Eve replied softly.

"Is it that obvious?" I hid my face in my hands.

"Only to people with eyes in their heads. Come on." She started to drag me with her.

"What? Where are you taking me?"

* * *

Julia

My eyes almost popped out of my head when I saw Mike making his way to the podium with Eve. I hadn't even noticed that bimbo was here. When they started a very, very off-key version of 'I will survive' I cringed, especially when I saw how much fun they had. I glanced at Cody and noticed he had the same scowl on his face, but his was directed at Randy, sitting across from us.

"Codes, can you please stop fighting with Randy?"

"No!" he snapped. "Friends don't do that to each other."

"Cody, please. He apologized a million times already. I'd hate if I killed the friendship between you."

"You didn't kill it. He did."

"Cody..." I sighed. It was annoying that Cody was just as stubborn as I was.

"What? Is it that bad that I hate that you hang out with guys that have the hots for you? I never say anything because I don't want us to fight, but I hate it when you hang out with Mike, I hate it when you hang out with Randy. I know I can't stop you, but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Don't you trust me?" He was quickly crossing a line now. I slipped off his lap and sat back on my seat. If I had expected him to back down now, I was wrong.

"It's them I don't trust." He crossed his arms and leant back, watching me.

"And what do you think they will do? Come on Cody, grow up please! Do you really think I'd be with you if I had wanted Mike or Randy?" I didn't succeed in keeping my voice down anymore. Around us, our friends shifted uncomfortably.

"I have no idea what you want! You blew me off for tonight, but here you are with them!"

"I didn't blow you off! I hate stupid action movies! So excuse me if I wanted a night of fun with my friends. FRIENDS Cody! Nothing more! You are impossible!" I stormed off, with Cody in pursuit.

He caught up with me just when I jumped into a taxi. I had expected him to continue the discussion where we left off, but instead he leant over to me, wrapped his hands in my hair and pulled me close for a mind-blowing, earth-shattering kiss.

"I... What? Why?" My brain had just turned to mush.

"I'm sick of taking it slow. It's turning me paranoid. So I'm gonna take you to my room and do something about that." Intense, azure eyes stared down on me; the look on his face was almost grim, like he expected me to protest.

But really, why would I?


	29. Another impossible choice

**Chapter 29 Another impossible choice**

6 months later.

Life was pretty good. Some things had changed, other things never would. Cody and I were still together and - in a way - still taking it slow. We didn't talk future, we didn't even think future, we just enjoyed being together and tried to keep the drama to a minimum. That didn't always work out the way we planned it, but making up our heated arguments in the best way possible compensated for a lot. It worked out like this, for both of us.

Yeah... life was just as it was supposed to be, just as I planned it.

Until I got this letter.

I stared at the white piece of paper in my hands, the ABC-studio logo swimming before my eyes. For the sixth time I read the letter. I couldn't believe that this was happening to me right now. Another impossible choice. It was beginning to look like the story of my life.

Without even thinking about it I picked up my phone and searched for the number of my best friend, the only one who could help me think this through before I would even think about talking about this with Cody.

"Hello?" Mike's sleepy voice made me cringe.

"Oh... sorry, I forgot about the time difference again."

"It's okay... I'm getting used to it." He stifled a huge yawn. "Wait a minute..."

I heard soft shuffling in the background and I could just make out Eve's sleepy voice, "Who's that, Mike?"

"It's Jules... you go back to sleep. I'll be right back, okay?" A white hot flame of jealousy flared through my stomach when I heard the unmistakable sound of a kiss. No matter how much I loved Cody, Mike still owned a piece of my heart. At those times when I fought with Cody, I hurt myself with the could-have-beens and cried myself asleep from shame and regret.

"So... I'm all for you now. Tell me... you sound upset."

I sighed, "Well..., not exactly upset. Just really, really confused. I just got a letter..."

"Yeah... you gotta open it and read it. You know how to read, right?"

"Your joking is off at this time a night. I read the letter, Mikey. It is an invitation for a job interview."

"What? I didn't know that you were thinking about leaving."

"I'm not... but do you remember that I was a while ago, before I got together with Cody?"

Yeah, vaguely... So what's the job?"

"ABC has an opening for a writer with Grey's Anatomy."

He whistled. "Your dream job right? You always wanted to write television shows. So what's the problem?"

"The job is in LA... and Cody hates LA. Last time we were in LA he said he'd rather eat his own hand than live in that hell hole packed with brainless fakes."

"That sounds like Cody, he probably means me by that. But LA is not that bad, if you know the right places to go. I love it here and I know you do, too."

"I know, I know... I went to college in LA and I would never have left if it wasn't for the WWE. But Cody is more of a small town guy, the place where everyone knows everyone."

"Boring and so not like you."

"Also true... I've been putting off this conversation with Cody. I didn't want a fight about something that might not happen for a long time."

"Are you still fighting that much?"

"Kind of, we learned how to avoid those subjects that we disagree on."

"I'm not gonna give you relationship advise, Jules. You know my opinion about this. The main question is whether you love him enough to give up your dreams."

"If you really love someone, you won't ask them to give up his dreams, right?" I softly sniffled, feeling incredible sorry for myself.

"You can answer that question yourself. But it's also the other way around. If you really love someone would you ask him to do something that makes them unhappy? I'm sorry, Jules, but it seems like you have to make a choice. Have you even talked to Cody about this?"

When I denied this, he snorted. "Why doesn't that surprise me? Talk to him, but I tell you this; you would be crazy if you didn't at least go to the job interview and honestly if you get the job you would be crazy not to take it."

I pouted. I hated it when he was right and didn't just tell me what I wanted to hear.

"I have to choose between the love of my life and my dream... great.

Mike chuckled. "Love of your life? Really? Come on, I used to think that Maryse was the love of my life. I know you hate it when I say it, but you are still so insanely young and you still have to learn so much about yourself. Your problem is that you try to live your life like it's a book and you're looking for that one prince charming. Well, Jules, prince charming doesn't exist, there's just us regular guys who try our best to please our girls and fail miserable most of the time."

"I hate you, you know that."

"Yeah I know... sweet dreams, Jules... and talk to Cody. The guy might surprise you."

"Bye."

* * *

Mike

I sighed when I hung up the phone. It might have been bad of me to say it, but at times like this I was glad to be released from the drama that was her life. Not everything was her fault, but one way or another everything always turned into trouble. It would be a full-time job to steer her away from it and once I had gotten over her, I had never looked back. Knowing Jules, she pondered over what could-have-been, but I always stayed clear of those conversations. She made her choice and in the end, I was better off for that.

I went back to bed and looked at my beautiful girl who was curled up in a ball at my side of the bed. Eve opened her eyes as I sat down on the bed and smiled that radiant smile that still made me feel a little giddy whenever I saw it. She might be just as young as Jules, but so much more level-headed, stable and simply more mature.

"What was it this time? Another fight with Cody?"

I shook my head while I climbed back into bed and pulled her close against me. "No, but there probably will be." I quickly explained what was going on. I had no secrets for this girl.

"So she'll dump Cody and move to LA?"

"When she gets the job, she probably will. Not that she already knows that herself, but in the end she'll always choose herself over others."

"You want her to do that, right?"

I sighed, "I dunno... I think she can do a lot more than writing for the WWE."

"That's not what I meant, Mike."

I searched her eyes for a clue of what she meant, frowning at the hint of uncertainty I saw there.

"Then what do you mean, Evy? You're not jealous or something? I've no intention to run back to her if she decides to dump Cody. She's my friend, but you are the one I love."

That bright smile lightened her face again and I couldn't resist brushing a kiss on those sweet lips.

"You always know the right thing to say, don't you Mike?"

"Of course I do, I'm awesome." I chuckled before I was serious again. "I mean it, Eve. I'm not with you because I couldn't be with her. I'm with you because you are an amazing woman and you made me fall head over heels for you. What I felt for her is nothing compared with what I feel for you. With you I see a future, I wanna grow old with you, have a family with you." I blushed slightly after I said this. We hadn't been together for that long and we hadn't talked future yet.

Eve cupped my face and made me meet her eyes. "I love you, Mike." Our lips met for a sweet kiss. When we pulled away there was an amused sparkle in her honey-coloured eyes. "So, how many kids do you want?"

I chuckled. "Six! I was an only child and I always wanted to have a big family."

"Six?" Eve giggled. "That's a lot. We'll just take them one at a time. But not yet, okay?"

I nodded, "In five years or so, when I'm securely in the main event and can afford to take some time off."

"You really thought this through already."

"I did... that's what you do when you turn 30 soon. I wanna start my own wrestling dynasty. But right now, I thought that maybe we could practice a bit, you know, for those six kids we need loads of practice."

I winked at her, before kissing her passionately. Her protests that it was the middle of the night and that at my age I needed my beauty sleep were ignored. Yeah, I was more than happy with my life.

* * *

Cody

I sat on my bed with my head in my hands. Julia had just left for a meeting and I was glad to have a few moments to myself. Last night she had heard she got the job with ABC-studios. She had said she wouldn't take it if I wanted her not to; she said there would be other jobs and that I was more important than some job. But I saw how her eyes shone when she talked about it, I had seen her excitement when she answered the phone and got the news. She wanted this, this was her dream and no matter how much it hurt, I stood in the way of that.

I could never live in a city like LA or New York. I didn't mind spending a few days there. Well, I didn't mind spending some time in New York, but LA? I hated it there. I hated the city, I hated the people, I had no particular love for the entire state California and most of all I had no intention of moving away from my family. In all honesty, I was a small town guy and I never had found a reason to change that.

If it would be temporally, I could have tried. Maybe, for a few years... if I had too. I rarely spend more than two days a week at home anyway. But I highly doubted that this would be something temporally for Julia. This was her dream job and there would always be new shows or new movies to write. There would always be another challenge. Not to mention that Julia loved Los Angeles.

Six months ago I had believed that after what we had gone through, we could survive everything and now it looked like a simple change of jobs would drive us apart.

I hated how fate always managed to come between us and force us to make a choice. For most people, this wouldn't be a problem. Take Evan and Sarah. If Sarah had the same opportunity, Evan would simple move with her. Same went for Randy, for Ted, for most of the guys I knew. Why did it matter so much to me where I lived? Was I really that narrow-minded?

Maybe we could try. I wanted her to take the job and breaking up with her because I didn't like the city she would have to move to, was immature and not to mention really, really stupid. Because in the end I loved her like crazy.

So we would try and we might even make it.

**THE END**

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**I'm really glad I finished this. And most of all i'm really proud that I didn't give up but that I finished it after all. Thank you all for staying with me along the way and I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. ****I'd really appreciate if you let me know what you think about the ending. So even though it's over, please review this last one :)**


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